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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic


Beautiful dream

I saw a dream last night
IT was beautiful,
But the scene was white,
Much I tried to make it clear
But it was stromy,
and I felt fear
Though it was blur,
I raised my head,
I found my foot stepping ahead,
There I saw a lady in white,
She made me close,
and I felt so right,
The moment I tried to speak a word,
I felt she weeped and I was stuttered,
Suddenly my eyes flew open,
and it was a dream,
I need my mother,
But she is dead
I remember the last words that
she said,
"I love you my dear,
and I'll always stay,
Whenever you need, I'll make a way,"
Now I love her more than
I did before,
Yet! remember the tears that will rolled,
She will there in my heart,
cause I've hold,
And all my memories will never fade
cause this was my lovely dream
I've ever had.


Submitted: October 19, 2011

© Copyright 2023 FAHMIDA. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments:



I do understand the pain of losing a dear one and living without that person

Sun, May 12th, 2013 5:52am


Ok thanks.

Mon, June 10th, 2013 10:59pm


I know the pain of losing someone you love. It isn't easy and the grief never ends, it just becomes more bearable. I too have had dreams with the one I lost and they hurt more than memories because they seem so real. Good job!

Sun, June 30th, 2013 8:18pm


Thank you for your comment.

Mon, July 1st, 2013 12:28am


Awwh such a sad and emotional poem. I understand what its like loosing someone you love. Very beautiful and powerful poem. Good job!

Mon, July 1st, 2013 5:39pm


Thank you

Mon, July 1st, 2013 11:07am

Elizabeth Smit

It's a beautiful poem!Here and there a couple of grammar errors, for egg. "she *make me close" should be *made. But keep on writing, you have real talent.

Mon, December 9th, 2013 9:13pm


Thanks a lot...I'll take care of it next time.

Mon, December 16th, 2013 7:32am


Aw, this is a sweet poem. Is this from experience? This is a wonderful piece and I will definitely read more of your work. :) -Fantasy

Sun, March 30th, 2014 10:04pm


Aww thank you so much. Well I can say both imaginary as well as experience.

Mon, March 31st, 2014 12:13am

Sahar Ahmad

A great and emotional poem. It was warm and relaxing. I enjoyed it but noticed just a few mistakes in the end. Read it and you will find them.

Sat, May 17th, 2014 8:49am


Ok thanks. I'll see to it.

Mon, May 19th, 2014 2:17am


So lovely poem. Heart touching!

Tue, April 14th, 2015 12:56pm


Thanks a lot.

Sun, April 26th, 2015 11:17am

Miss Melodramatic

Hi Fahmida. There are a few mistakes I found: firstly, when you're describing the dream I think you should stick to either past or present tense, 'much I tried to make it clear' doesn't make sense, 'I found my foot stepping aside' doesn't really make sense either -it sounds like the protagonist doesn't have any control over their own body. If that's what you mean then I think you should say that the person's body is moving on its own before that. It should be 'Though it was blurred', I think 'She make me close' should be something like 'She pulled me close' instead, it should be 'wept' not 'weeped' and 'I stuttered' instead of 'I was stutter', I think 'Suddenly my eyes got open' should be 'Suddenly my eyes were open' or 'flew open', 'that will rolled' should be 'that rolled' and finally, 'fed' should be 'fade'. Now that that's out of the way, I really love the tragedy of this poem. You set the scene well for this theme as well. Well done. -Danni

Sat, April 16th, 2016 7:15pm


What a sad and emotional poem and I know and understand what this feels like. This is a really nice and beautifully written poem that so many can connect with thank you for sharing :)

Mon, April 18th, 2016 10:11am


Thank you so much . Happy to know u liked it.

Mon, April 18th, 2016 7:32am

Bella Writing

Well done :) sad, emotional but also hopeful. I like it! :)

Sat, June 11th, 2016 9:53am


Thank you so much :)

Sun, June 12th, 2016 2:31am

Sahar Ahmad

Good poem. I like it that you always use realistic themes. Just noticed a few mistakes. In the 11th line, I think it should have been she brings me close instead of she make me close. I think the beauty of a poem is its flow. However, I noticed a change in tenses. I feel she weeped and I was stutter. You are using feel (present tense) and was (past tense) in one verse. I think it could be I saw her weeping and I stuttered. Next verse: suddenly my eyes got open. I think you can make it; In a moment all was lost,
For my eyes did decide to open.
It was a dream, such a beautiful one
Or it can simply be: in a second, I opened my eyes/ my eyes got openED.
Later, you have written so beautiful dream, where I think such a beautiful fits better. Then I think instead of last word, it should be last words. And in the third last line I think you meant fade instead of fed. In my opinion, the last lines should be : Because this the best dream, I have ever had. Other than that, I noticed that in many places you have changed the tense. Do not change it unless it is a requirement. Choose on tense and write the poem in that, so, pl proof read it. However, I loved how you wrote she is dead. Like you deadpanned it. That sounds so real and smart. A bold touch to a sensitive poem made it a billion times better. I felt the poem and related to it. I lost a brother and my best friend too. :( Great poem, though. I hope you do not take offense that I pointed out the mistakes. xoxo

Fri, July 29th, 2016 5:45pm


U knw this is my very 1st poem , I wrote it 4-5 yrs ago I think and I do point out those mistakes before but didn't got time to re edit it and thats all ..thanks anyway I have to edit it as soon as possible..and let me tell you I'm not that good in writing but still write coz I love to....have a good time..

Fri, July 29th, 2016 11:01am

Sharfaa Adams

I just lost a family recently so I can relate to these words.
Absolutely beautiful

Tue, August 30th, 2016 6:28pm


Thank you. And sorry to hear that.

Tue, August 30th, 2016 10:57pm


Great poem!
It's sad but it's amazing at the same time, I liked it too much
well done ^^
~ sW 12 ~

Thu, July 27th, 2017 11:58am


I gave it a like and cherished it :)

Mon, June 18th, 2018 12:55am

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