The past few weeks have been terrible, I have no one to talk to over here. I miss my friends and family so much I don't think I can stay in England anymore. My boyfriend and I are fighting more and more each day and it's always my fault even when it's not. Because I have no one to talk to and all the fighting that is happening in my relationship I'm becoming more and more depressed as each day goes by. I've been depressed before so I know what's happening but I just can't seem to stop it from taking over, I haven't thought about cutting myself in about two years but I feel like it's the only thing that will make me feel better. I know I need help but I can't talk to my family back home because they'll only worry, same with my friends, I want to talk to my boyfriend and tell him how I've been feeling but he works so much that I barely see him and when I do we're usually fighting. I just don't want to feel like this, I want it to go away and never come back, I miss being happy, I miss enjoying things like everyone else. I've been stress eating because I'm fighting the urge to cut, I've gained weight and my face is breaking out which makes me stressed and insecure and more depressed. I need help but don't know where or who to turn to, I can feel my life slipping through my hands once again but this time I don't know if i can stop it.
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