To my not-so-dearest, not incredibly loving Husband

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Leaving a horrid relationship...finding closure.

Submitted: October 05, 2010

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Submitted: October 05, 2010

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Oct 5, 2010


To my not-so-dearest, not incredibly loving Husband.


It has been over 2 weeks since that day. I still have bruises on my arm and can hardly move my neck or lift anything very heave because of the pain in my shoulder. Your son cries daily because of all the changes in his life. Our oldest thought is really pulling through and helping me around the house a hell of a lot more than you ever did.

I'm picking up the pieces of my life that you so thoughtfully scattered every which way but Sunday. I am finding all the holes in our (or should I say my) finances and mending them back together. I know it will take a while but without you in my life I know I can fix the shit you left me in.

Packing your things right now, kind of a bitter sweet feeling. I realize how much of our life was not about me and our kids, it was about your hobbies. Don't worry, I won't destroy what you worked so hard to put together in your own interest....even though you did destroy what I worked so hard to keep together. If your not sure, I'm talking about us...as in You, Me and our two wonderful children.


As an insurance matter so to speak I have told everybody about our relationship and your controlling abusive ways. I have full faith in my real friends and family that they will yell at me or kill you if I ever let you permanently back in my life. It is amazing all the people who I have in my not immediate life that are supportive and happy that I am getting out of this relationship.


Please know that this is my final decision and it is nothing against you. It is more of a life change for me. My kids need me, and if things escalated to far and I wasn't around anymore....I don't think our boys would be able to take it. I know my family and all my friends wouldn't be able to take it. I wouldn't be able to see my kids growing up and their first girlfriends, their wedding day, my grandbabie's...It just isn't something I want to chance. I can't take that chance.


I honestly hope you find true help. I honestly hope that you are able to find someone that makes you happy. Know though that I truly and Honestly believe that NOBODY deserves to be treated the way that you treated me. .


I am, with the help of some wonderful people, beginning to realize that I am a wonderful person, that I am smart and beautiful and that I am not worthless or lazy or a bad mom. This has been a huge eye opener for me. I am still trying to adjust to feeling good about myself. I am still in the process of finding myself again since you consumed and molded me into what you wanted to be I lost sight of myself.


I will move on...I will find eternal happiness rather you think different or not. You will not control me or my thoughts anymore.


So, I must finally thank you. In the 10 years of our relationship you have truly gave me two of the most wonderful little men in the whole entire world. You have shown me the real meaning of the phrase "listen to your heart" . I'm telling you now I should have listened to my heart or followed my gut instinct...however if I did that then I wouldn't have those two boys in my life. Because I wouldn't have been with you.


My only regret in this WHOLE situation is that I didn't put an end to US a long time ago.


with my warmest regards

Me


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