Just breath Gheeps. Life has thrown you some curve balls. Being diagnosed with schizophrenia, a name you knew enough about to scare the hell out you was intense.. He told himself. Try to think back and remember the good things now, You made it man. The rollecoaster it's been.
Gheeps was extremely peacable, a gentle soul. His reality a was out of touch with the worlds. Or maybe he just wasn't as conformed to the rest of the worlds views, and thinking.
Gheeps lived a normal life, socially ,and he was always had a job. There was no shortage of his sense of independence, and though he never asked anybody for anything he often naively helped friends when they asked him. See, in Gheeps mind, being right, being what he thought was the right thing to be was all that mattered.
He was so in touch with that, that even when he saw a hand reach into his life and pull something out, he let it go. He was numb to it. He didn't care. There was a shield he had that protected him from darker fates, and it allowed him to be different. To be oblivous of the dark side of human nature He felt he had all that he needed. No one was able to take it away from him, and he was happy. All the people and friends Gheeps met in Taos N.M were not bad people. In fact most were decent. I guess human nature will take advantage of someone if they let them.
I just wanted to apoligize that i took advantage of you Gheeps Jonas said
Him and Gheeps were on a dirt road out in the middle of the desert. Jonas wanted to check out some of the green houses they build out there.
O' come man, you didnt take advantage of me. said Gheeps
But i did Gheeps said Jonas.
The only reason im even saying it is because i dont think you'd care.
Thats how Gheeps companions new him. He lived in another world. The schizophrenia he was diagnosed with three years ago had turned into some kind of blessing. His thoughts allowed for his happiness.
Gheeps moved into a new cottage after Jonas, a realtor friend urged him. He was really a drunk greek guy that thrived off stress, and was always into some kind of business deal, or scheme involving realestate. He came from a rich family. He was still a good friend to Gheeps, and took to him like a litlle brother with a big heart.
This was after about a month of knowing Jonas, and Gheeps was to say the least niave of human natures dark side. The dark side of human nature was taken place by a delusion. in Gheeps mind It all made sense. He just saw things differently.
The cottage was small, and shared with Jonas and another new arrival to Taos. The place was often filled with new age hippies, and peace pipes. These are the kind of people you can only find in the town of Taos, N.M. Gheeps slept in a corner of a room on the way to the bathroom. Only a curtain gave him privacy. He slept on a recliner he bought out of the sears catalog. It was ben in the middle with a bump. He like the idea of it. Only take what you need, only be resposible for your basic needs. That's how he felt free. In that sense he was.
Gheeps soul was like a water balloon. It was full of good intentions, and naive ideals.Life was going on around him, vibrant, and colorful. Hot springs with naked woman, which was the custom there. Late nights with guitars and people trying to learn how to play congo drums.
He felt free. That was all he ever cared about feeling. As long as he did he was happy.Gheeps never enjoyed the darker aspects of life, he didn't know how. His experience of life was as a unfienged soul.
Half a year went by like mollases . It had been about half a year since Gheeps hauled his stuff up there from florida. Working at the ski resort up the mountain, odd construction jobs, and cook job at the Taos Inn restaraunt.
As was the routine Gheeps would use his truck to pick up Todd, Jon ,and Jonas from work. He was always strecthing himself for anyone no matter what favor they asked of him. His friends knew he wasnt stupid, and one night Jonas found his medications. He must have looked up the uses for Zyprexa, because later he brought up shcizophrenia to Gheeps.
Schizophrenia can either be worse or better than reality. Said Jonas as they drove up the mountain to Gheeps.
My sister had it. said Jonas
Really? asked Gheeps.
Yeah. She did. Thats it buddy. Jesus aint gonna save from there.
Jonas and Todd had put a downpayment on this old house with 6 bedrooms in hopes of turning it into a hostel. They were the two owners, or potential owners of the house Gheeps and five other people all stayed in. You were always meeting new and enigmatic characters in Taos. It was like a hippie commune. Gheeps, had met most of them at the Snow Mansion on arriving in Taos. It was A hostel down the road on a little street with a few mexican bars , and green chilli pepper stands on a dirt road. Thats where Jonas and Todd got the idea for the hostel.
You little weasel! Jonas proclaimed to Todd.
You are such a little weasel.
Don't call me that!…Todd said.
Jonas was angry because Todd was trying to cut him out of the deal with the hostel. So, Gheeps and Jon watched the drama unfold in the commons area. Jon handed them a few pillows and suggested instead of bloody fists , that they have a pretty intense pillow fight. It was the best entertainment of the night. Only these two guys would resort to a pillow fight..Life was full for Gheeps, but he lived like a person having a part of his brain cut out. He did every thing in his own way. Most people got used to it. After about a year, for some reason life had pulled Gheeps into a depression.Probably becuase his life was starting to drain him,and he was loosing what secure footing he had on his reality. With new experiences on the horizon he decided to head back to florida.,
"I'll probably be back one of these days" ..Gheeps said to Todd.
"It'll be good to see you again Gheeps".. said Todd.
Gheeps said goodbye, and headed out for the 16 hour drive back to Florida.
By the time he got back to florida he had lapsed into a nervous break down.
This was the end of being satisfied. Reality had finally caught up to him. Years went by as Gheeps learned to acknowledge his false reality, and adapt to the real one. Life was an intense rollacoaster. He did level out after years of merciless torment.
A lot has changed , and after Gheeps moved back to florida he never talked to those friends again. His niave views of people changed. He became sharper, and a vibrant opponent to this dangerous world. Gheeps looks back knowing how his big heart allowed for some of the people he met to take advantage of him , but he still wouldn't change a thing. He is thankful that he got to experience something most people never will. To be so oblivious of the worlds ways, and dark side that you rise above the world. It was a moment on a cloud with no regrets.
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