Love or Sex Obession

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
I was excited to loose my virginity. Perhaps something more.

Submitted: April 17, 2010

A A A | A A A

Submitted: April 17, 2010



Wednesday August 12th
I'm so riled up fortomorrow! My stomach was sick all day seen I told mom I was gay yesterday. I just don't want to go to bed feeling sick again.
What if I loose my virginity tomorrow? Is it wrong to loose your virginity before you even start dating?. There are others who have sex on first time basis. Hornybastards. There is simply nothing wrong with sex when 99% of the population participates in it. I'm so nervous fortomorrow. I want him to come for me and not his ex. He is so gorgeous and probably fun to be with. I question if I should get a hair cut. Would that make me more attractive? I want him so badly.
This is ridiculous. I found out today that I'm the living dead. My dad committed suicide. I moved in my teen years. I'm a gay male and want to be a shrink. It's nice to know I'm bound for the grave.
I always forget there are others out there. Other than Brandon. But, what a rarity, there is only one of him. I hope he texts me when he gets off work. If he does I will feel happy. I forget anything could happen, but I'm such a visionary. I like to think ahead, but I get sodisappointedwhen things don't go my way.
Life means nothing and everything. What a vacuum. Till 11:00, Brandon will be off then. Chow
It took some time to identify my liking for Brandon as a sex thing instead of a true love. I guess we both said we were totally into each other a lot but the truth of the matter was we were lusting. I think this is true on both parts. I was probably more guilty of this than he but that is very difficult to tell.
I have proof that I was being more sexually obsessed than in love because I had planned on losing my virginity that summer. A good friend of mine agreed with me that we should lose our virginity's. Granted we both failed at this seemingly impossible task, however my friend and I have both learned that maybe having sex isn't the only thing involved in a relationship.
To read more by Jacob Woods check out his blog Good as Gay at

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