Once upon a time, Rachel Lynn Steffen was picking her nose in the middle of the street and everyone saw her and laughed at her. Then this one handsome guy named Shane Nathan Hale saved her from humiliating herself. He cleaned her face so it wasn’t so snotty any more. Turns out Shane was a prince and fell in love with Rachel and Shane asked Rachel to marry him. Unfortunately Rachel said “HELL NO, I LOVE LIAM PAYNE FROM ONE DIRECTION”. Shane had a confusion look on his face and said “what”. Rachel said “I’m joking with you Shane! I want to marry you and have sex with you and make babies with you. We will name them LouLou and SouSou. They are going to be the most beautifulgirls I will ever give birth too!” Rachel got married on February 31st and they lived in a HUGE castle! Rachel helped take care of Shane’s parents. She helped them because she’s Shane’s bitch and everyone loves a bitch.
One night, Rachel’s friend Gabriella came over for a sleepover! Gabby and Rachel went mattress surfing and afterwards they ate all the ice cream that they could eat, they ate so much of it that they looked like they were prego. (Well most likely Rachel!) We ate Cheetos, well, Rachel shoved them up her nose and she had bacon strips hanging out of her mouth making herself look like a walrus. Shane came into the room and started laughing his ass off. Rachel started dancing around like a baboon (OOH OOH AH AH!) Shane ran into his room and put on a Teletubbies costume and he started to dance, and he ran into a door and broke his eye. Rachel started laughing her ass off, she went out to the kitchen and grabbed the bottle of champagne and chugged it until she threw up rainbows. Rachel ran outside and picked up a medium sized rock and screamed “SPONGEBOB… PATRICK… I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE.” Gabby and Shane looked at Rachel like she was crazy. Gabby went to go get the sponge and cut a little square off of it and put it in the place the rock was and Rachel looked down and yelled “FOUND YOU SPONGEBOB!!! WHERES PATRICK???” Right after that Rachel wiped out, Shane and Gabby got sharpies (mine was light pink, Shane’s was hot pink). I wrote across Rachel’s forehead “LOSER”, Shane gave Rachel a huge hairy mustache and a goatee. I drew Harry Potter glasses around her eyes. Then we all of a sudden wiped out.
The next morning, Rachel gets up to go to the bathroom and she screamed. Shane and Gabby go running to the bathroom and we come in to her sitting on the toilet. Shane says, “What’s wrong babe?” Rachel screamed again and said, “What are you guys doing in here?” I said, “Rachel… you screamed…” “I screamed because there’s a new pink dress on sale and its fabulous!” Rachel said. “Oh” said Shane. Shane and I walked out of the bathroom snickering. “Lets give her five more minutes and then she should scream. She really loves her toilet.
soon to be updated (: ****
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