Something

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic


This is just a peek into my life. I hope you enjoy.

Submitted: January 29, 2018

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Submitted: January 26, 2018

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Ciera Rumbaugh 
Overcoming a Challenge 
648 words 
Mon Jan 29 2018, 9:42 am


Sometimes, events in your life come at you like a train. Maybe, sometimes, they tickle you like a feather would. When you do not understand something, you get mad, correct? You feel dumb and sad and you laugh at the things that do not make sense to you because you are blinded and ignorant to the cause of the feelings. You know the truth deep down and you do not have the will to bring it to the surface until it all hits you like a train.

 
Just because it was my biological mom and step-dad divorcing, doesn't meant it wasn't tough. My biological father left my sister, my mother and I when I was younger than two. Our step-dad was not too good to her in years past. Truth be told, my mother is the best person I know. She is amazing and I beat myself up every damn time I think about how I believed him over her. This challenge cane with many challenges. The main one being the divorce. There is so much more than just a split relationship. Double schedule's, two houses, messed up sleeping habits, stress, depression, anxiety, new, and the people that believe the wrong side of the story. Everyone has asked my parents how they feel about it yet no one has asked me. No one has came to me about the story and I know the story from a view they probably will never understand. The view of a breaking child. 


My parents decided to divorce the weekend before my 16th birthday and only recently got the divorce finalised the beginning of this school year. It's much different being a teenager/young adult experiencing these situations rather than being a small child and not knowing what is what and who is in the wrong. I know who is in the wrong and I have never seen my mom more happy than before. She had been sad and lonely my entire life. Seventeen damn years that she wasted on her heart to keep her children from being in the cold or not having food. Seventeen long years she had to be in pain to keep us out of pain. Seventeen years with the devil. 


Now, you might think I am being over dramatic and unrealistic, but look at it through my eyes. Think about spending your entire life blinded from the pain corroding inside of the heart that carried you for 9 months, raised you for 18 years, and that will love you for eternity. Imagine not being able to comprehend all of the pain after it is gone. Today, I am now just realising from my childhood that I have developed social issues because everyone was so blind. Except my mother who tried to get me to believe, but I didn't until my step-dad moved out and I went to his house on weekends. I saw his temper, his impatience, and verbal abuse. I saw it all and I see it to today. He talks over you and makes you believe he is the definition of the saint his mother was; but he is not. He calls you fat and acts like it doesn't hurt you but all you want to do is starve yourself and run until you pass out. You can't do that though, because you aren't what he says you are. 


I am happy. Sadness is such an inconvenience for someone with as much strength as I do. Sometimes I am just tired, but my mother had been more sad than I could have ever been. I just do not understand how any of this could have happened. I could have stopped my mother from having this pain. I suppose it is truly worth it in the end when you still have the people you love.

 


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