She forced you into the mould
You didn't fit.
Neatly disgarding you into
The waste basket of her mind.
Melliferous words
Rolled off her tongue
Hitting your ears
Like a thousand needles.
She pushed and pulled
Rending your soul
With every blow.
Pulled your heart
Through the bars of your ribcage
The gall of it!
The heart still persisted.
She squeezed it
Eyes brimming with eagerness
As the blood trickled out.
Her eyes searched yours
A bitter smile
Contorted her lips
Defiant heart beating
Returned behind bars.
She dismissed the rain in your eyes
Like she didn't just
Create the storm.
Why are you so hateful?
She asked.
The icy words stuck
To her wintery tongue.
Why are you...
You?
Why?
Submitted: April 25, 2017
© Copyright 2022 H D Cooper. All rights reserved.
Comments
amazing piece of writing - well done
Tue, April 25th, 2017 9:08pmThe imagery is stunning! I quite enjoyed it.
Tue, April 25th, 2017 9:23pmI like this. I also enjoyed the use of the word "maliferous." I feel like I can relate sort of on a personal level to this poem, as I'm sure a lot of people can. I really enjoyed this! I'm going to look for more of your writings, I can't wait! Great poem
Tue, April 25th, 2017 10:19pmThis was nice. Now I'm no good at interpreting poetry, I just kind of recently got into the whole world of it like less than a month or maybe a month ago I can't remember lol :) I'm rambling so....
I was trying to figure out exactly what the anarrator was going through. My mind was constructing this entire story for her in so many different scenario's that it excited it a bit reading it. I read through it at least 3 times I think. First I thought maybe she was being berated by a mother, or a family member. Like someone she trusted was destroying her inside and out and as the poem came to an end either the pain became so severe but she just could not find a way out because this person was her family, because they were always there and so she just ended up asking why. Or the abuse finally became physical.
After that I though maybe she was hurting herself, like the secondary person was not another person at all but maybe a personification of self loathing and hatred who the narrator really was and what she thought about her own image and what she thought about the fact that she hated herself.
I don't know why but my mind was raving when I read this. It was so much fun to read.
Thank you for the request.
XoXo
Kossettes.
Wow. Just wow ????
Wed, April 26th, 2017 2:58pmBeing forced to be what you are not by parental or friends expectations -- am I right here! And being put down, at least verbally, when you either can't or won't fit the mold....There are some brilliant lines here, too many to mention. So easy for me to relate to, and it's heading for my shelf!
Wed, April 26th, 2017 4:00pm
Author
Reply
Thanks so much for reading! I am so happy you liked it.
It was written about my narcissistic biological mother. She psychologically abused me for most of my life (I'm 34 now) and one day made the move to disown me...whether to make me feel guilty so that I would come crawling back?...I don't know. A few days later I decided we to leave it as no contact and have never felt better. The constant yoyo between her gaslighting, psychological abuse and then pretending to love me after almost 30 years had definitely begun to take its toll.
Thanks for your comment, Hullaballo. I am truly humbled that you shelved it.
Thank you so much. x
Good obviously i used an emoji the website turned it to bunch of question marks
Thu, April 27th, 2017 12:15pmAside from your impressive way with words, this is a very touching piece of poetry. Your ability to leave a reader without any option but to feel the emotion behind your written work is a great quality to have as a writer. Well done.
Fri, April 28th, 2017 2:28amI like it! What was the inspiration behind it??
Mon, May 1st, 2017 10:46pmVery deep. Excellent adjective use! Please check out some of my work and tell me what you think!
Thu, May 11th, 2017 3:59amThere is an abnormal instinct in a way someone ask why you did this to me. You ask all the time our narrator in this story gives space for living a life of hatred without the worth to care each other. It is said that there is a value dropped for its unusual conventions. I dont know where the whole stuff ends expect in desperate fulfillment of lust. May be the character here need to know what is love and ask why not now. To giveaway this feeling do not ask a heart why me as the episode chase an unworthy feeling of abuse all that must end for a betterment. I feel your next poem must illustrate how someone will come out of all such experiences. :)
Sun, May 21st, 2017 7:21amOhh Wowww marvelous ....
Tue, July 11th, 2017 3:02pmgood. very descriptive. no suspense really, just pain. Dramatic and interesting read. good job
Wed, November 7th, 2018 12:27amThat is such a trippy poem. So terrible how she treated him.
Fri, October 18th, 2019 10:58pmFacebook Comments
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its pretty good. :) you should join my publishing house.
Tue, April 25th, 2017 8:56pmAuthor
Reply
Ooh. Tell me more :-)
Tue, April 25th, 2017 2:21pm