By: Hannah Engle
There are so many times we just need to hold on… or at least try to, it may be hard but it is the best thing to do. I’ve had many times I have just needed to hold on and keep going.
I have grown up in a good home, I think I am a good person, at least I hope. I have an autistic brother who is 16 at this time and a mom and dad I live with. It’s hard sometimes. School is just a whole different story…I know school is supposed to be a benefit. But, sometimes it’s not. It can get hard at times and you may just want to let go. I know how you feel. I just remember so many times that is been hard with other people and getting older and having more problems. Don’t worry, just keep going. Most people don’t really like me. I have a group of friends I hang around with- where I feel comfortable. I’ve tried many times before to try to join in different groups but sometimes it doesn’t work.
At school I will walk down the hall and smile to people who pass by and maybe say “hi” but I am never mean. People will come by and cuss at me and I just try to keep walking. I always try to find the best way to get through things like this. I go to my homeroom class, and then there is a fight when the teacher isn’t looking and people have started fights with me before but, I try my best not to say anything and to do the right thing.
Usually lunch is bad for me, it’s less supervised and who knows what’ll happen. I talk to my best friend in school, Erin. She is sort of going through the same things as me.
At home, I feel so over protected, I can’t even have a phone, or text people. It sucks. I am a teenager, and I don’t feel like a normal one. I have had quite a lot of depression and anxiety about everything and its hard to live with—and no one seems to quite understand.
? ? ?
I am walking down the hall and I suddenly bump into my crush. “Oh, sorry” I say and I never would have thought of a worse comment back “bit-“then he right then stopped suddenly. “Sorry, I really didn’t mean it…i…just.. I am sorry”. He seemed like he meant it so I just said “ok, see you soon” my face then turns bright red right in the middle of the hall. I hate it when everyone just looks at me like I am a dumbass. Now, his locker is right beside mine and its pretty awesome.
I run into my friend in the hall. “Hey” she says fast and madly. “oh…uh.. hey…are you like…mad at me”? I say. My hands are sweating and the bell just rang and everyone just scatters across all the halls like crazy people yelling stupid things and teachers saying “guys, stop and be quiet”! I am like I really don’t give a crap what you say. “well, I will talk to you later…a-“ “would you stop that right now, I don’t wanna hear it”! I rose my voice to her and she shut her mouth… that’s for sure.
Chapter 2 coming soon.
© Copyright 2016 Hannah Engle. All rights reserved.