The Unwanted Secrets

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

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The Unknown Secrets

Today was a sunny day, children laughing and playing. A boy named Josh Bennett was looking outside of his bedroom window, with his lovely blue eyes and blondish, brownish hair. He kept on staring at this girl who was me; I have brown hair and brown eyes, I’m called Hayley-Jade Smith. I started to walk to school with my twin sister Lorna-Kay Smith who has same colour hair, but different coloured eyes. Her eyes are hazel.

The school uniform we had to wear was; plain black trousers, with a white blouse, any type of flat shoes (even trainers) and a black/blue cardigan. As we got to school, we both went to our group of friends and waited for the bell to ring, for us to go inside. Although our form teacher was always late, we still had to be at school on time.

I and Lorna-Kay are both 15 years old, we live with our mum Phillippa Smith who is 35 years old and our step dad Shane Wolfe, who is engaged to Phillippa and is 36 years old, and we also live with our older sister Carla-Louise Smith who is 18 years old.

Josh Bennett is 18 years old, and first got himself in prison when he was 16. Josh still lives with his parents; he has no qualifications, and cannot get a job due to his criminal record.

When it was dinner break, I and my sister headed home for dinner. The boy Josh was still staring at me. I felt like someone was watching me, so I looked up across the other side of the road and saw that it was a boy, in his window. He smiled at me; I smiled back and carried on walking.

‘Lorna-Kay, look that boy keeps looking at me, but he’s cute and he smiled at me.’

‘Who look at you, hey looks like you have got a crush, maybe you should ask him out.’ Lorna-Kay said pushing me in a kind of teasing way.

‘No, I think I will wait for him to ask me out.’ I said with a big smile on my face.

‘Fine, whatever.’ my sister didn’t seem very interested or bothered about it. As we sat at the table I couldn’t stop thinking about that boy. I wanted to know more about him, and who he was and what he did. We had a tuna sandwich for dinner, with a glass of water and strawberry yoghurt each. When we opened the door to go back to school, I noticed that the boy was still in his window. I smiled at him and made my way to school. Lorna-Kay thought it was weird how he kept staring all the time. Afterschool on our way home, Josh bumped into me on purpose to meet me.

‘Oh my god, I am so sorry, are you okay?’ He said, just looking into my eyes.

‘Yeah, it’s okay and I’m fine thanks.’ I said just gazing back into his eyes.

‘My name is Josh Bennett by the way, what’s yours?’ He asked, putting his hand out ready for me to shake.

‘I’m Hayley-Jade Smith; it’s nice to meet you.’ I shook his hand and glanced at my sister who was talking away with our mates.

‘Can I have your number please, if you don’t mind that is and maybe we could go out sometime?’ He asked getting his phone out.

‘Yeah sure, it’s 07794852137, what’s yours?’ I then asked, also getting my phone out.

‘Its 07766165352’ He put his phone away and started to walk me home. On the way he held my hand, and said that he would like to take me out for a meal at his house. I said,

‘Yeah sure, why not.’ I said with the biggest smile ever on my face. When we got to my house, we said goodbye to each other, until later tonight when we were going to have the meal.

‘Guess what Lorna-Kay’

‘What’ said Lorna-Kay looking confused.

‘I have a date tonight with that lad and it’s at his house.’ I said jumping up and down with excitement.  

‘You should be careful, you don’t know what he will be like or what he will do, and is he going to be on his own or his parents actually going to be there, seriously you have to be careful.’ Said Lorna-Kay worrying.

‘Your only saying that because your jealous, and yes I know it seems weird how I’m going to his house on my own, but he’s really nice and I like him.’ I said, but this time I was thinking more about it and what would happen tonight if it was just me and him, what he would do, what he would want. I was a little scared now, just thinking on what he would do.

I went to our room to get ready, into my nice jeans, and white blouse, and white trainers. I also straightened my hair and put make-up on. I looked proper nice. It was 7 o’clock and time for me to go to his house. Before I went I said bye to my twin sister, but my parents and older sister wasn’t home, they never really are because they are always working. I was nervous and scared on what might happen. I knocked at his door. No answer. I knocked again.

‘Hello, Hayley-Jade, wow you look proper nice, I can’t wait for tonight.’ I was wondering what he meant by that.

‘So what you got planned for us tonight then?’ I said smiling at him, for complimenting me.

‘Erm, just for us to have a meal and get to know each other, that sort of stuff and don’t worry we is on our own, so you don’t have to worry about my parents.’

‘Ok, well what we having?’ I said feeling a bit worried. He let me come inside and took my jacket and hung it up.

‘Just my favourite Spaghetti Bolognaise, and also I find it romantic from that Disney film Lady and the tramp.’ We both laughed. After a while we both sat on the settee watching a film. It was called The Reaping. He kept putting his hand on my leg. But I didn’t like it. He then turned to me and said,

‘Can we forget the film and just kiss instead.’ He said putting his arms round my waist and pulling me towards him. I didn’t know what to do because I wasn’t really ready for something like this. He didn’t give me a chance to answer and started kissing me and putting his hands all over my body. He started to take my clothes off. He started with my trousers and then my top.

‘Stop, I’m not ready for this, I’m sorry, I’m just not ready.’ I said pushing him away. He wouldn’t let go of me. I tried to get away but he had a firm grip on me.

‘Please let go of me.’ I said trying to get away from him.

He shoved me down and forced his body on top of mine. I wanted to scream, but I couldn’t because he put his hand over my mouth, as he shoved his self more inside me. I started to cry. Hours had passed. After he had finished, he left me there crying my eyes out. And said,

‘Right you can go now, but tell anyone, I will kill you, do you understand.’ He said grabbing my arms really hard. I found it hard to speak to him.

‘I said do you understand.’ He said shoving me.

‘Y....yes.’ I said stuttering.

‘Good, now go before my parents get home.’ He said pushing me out the door. It was now 11 o’clock. When I got home everyone was in bed, so I quietly went to bed and changed into my pyjamas. I just laid there crying my eyes out. I felt used and felt like no one cared for me.

The next day, it was a Saturday. Lorna-Kay went into my room and woke me up.

‘So, how did your date go last night?’ She asked looking at me intriguingly.

‘It was fine, but I don’t want to see him anymore.’ I said turning over to the other side. Lorna-Kay looked at me weirdly.

‘What happened like?’ She said looking confused.

‘Nothing happened, he’s just weird, that’s all, he even still watches Disney films, he’s right weird.’ I said, getting up out of my bed, to go to the window, to see if he was there. But luckily for me, he wasn’t. I turned to my sister, and just looked at her and thought should I tell her or not, would she even believe me, or would she be like, I told you so, I need my sister Carla-Louise with me. Where is she when I need her the most?

My sister said she had to go because she was going into town with some of her mates, I asked if I could go.

‘Can I come, please?’ I asked her, starting to get changed.

‘Yeah sure, have you got any money?’ She asked making sure I could get into town.

‘Yeah, don’t worry about it; I have saved up my pocket money since last year, I have £300 now, and I might as well spend it in town on some new clothes or something.’ I said, now finished from getting changed.

‘Oh my god, that’s a lot more money than what I got, I have only got a tenner, maybe that’s because I always spend it, Hayley-Jade, can you lend me a tenner please because I need £20 for this new dress I want for the dance next week .’ She begged on her knees for me to lend her a tenner.

‘Yeah, sure, just as long as you give me it back next time you get your pocket money which is next weekend anyway.’ I said looking at her, in a way to tell her that I want the money back.

‘Don’t worry, I will, and maybe in town, we will find a new boyfriend.’ She said, getting excited about going to town.

‘Ha-ha, don’t make me laugh; I don’t want to have anything to do with boys ever again.’ I said sarcastically.

‘Why’s that and does that mean you’re going to be a lesbian then?’ My sister asked teasing me.

‘Erm, no, just means that I have had enough of lads at the minute and if all lads are all dickheads when I’m ready for a relationship, then I just might, might become a lesbian, but it’s not for definite.’ I said laughing.

‘Well, that doesn’t sound like a bad idea actually.’ She said now laughing too.

‘Anyways should we get going?’ Lorna-Kay said now looking at her watch.

‘Yeah sure, let me just grab my money and phone.’ I said getting them out of my drawer. After I got them, we set off to the bus stop and waited. A couple of minutes later our mates joined us and just in time for the bus that came five minutes after they arrived. I didn’t want to get onto the bus. Josh was there.

‘Hey sis, look, it’s your lover boy.’ She shouted so that he heard.

‘Sis, stop it now, he’s not my lover boy and he never will be, ok, we kind of had an argument last night, so we aren’t going out anymore.’ I whispered so he didn’t hear me.

‘Oh my god, what exactly was the argument about, because one little argument shouldn’t stop you being together, I mean come on, you two would make a right good couple.’ She said, looking at me funny.

‘Look sis, I wouldn’t expect you to understand, ok, you know what I’m getting off the bus.’ Before she could stop me, I already pressed the bell, and made my way down to the doors.

‘Oh yeah, before I go here’s that tenner.’ I quickly went up to her and gave her a tenner. I said I was sorry, but I didn’t want to go to town anymore, so that’s what I told her. And then I just went. When I got home I just went up to my room. I started to cry again. No one was home as per usual. Next thing I know, I heard the front door swing open. I didn’t hear it shut. I quickly locked my bedroom door, and hid under my bed.

‘Hello, anyone home.’ I heard someone shout downstairs, it sounded like my sister Carla-Louise. I went to go and see.

‘Carla-Louise, is that you?’ I asked slowly walking down the stairs.

‘Yeah it’s me, will you help me get the shopping in please?’ She asked not even looking at me. I went outside to where her car was, and started getting the shopping bags in. When I had finished, my sister finally had a glance at me, and saw that I had been crying. I just didn’t say anything to her; she just looked at me, like as if she was waiting for me to tell her what was wrong.

‘What’s up sweetheart?’ She said hugging me. I felt safe in her arms, like as if no one could hurt me.

‘Nothing, well there is, but I’m not allowed to tell anyone or I will be killed.’ I said starting to cry even more. I looked up at her, and she just looked down at me.

‘What is it chick, I swear I won’t tell anyone, and why will you be killed, is it really that bad?’ She asked looking confused.

‘Yes it is that bad and how do I know you won’t tell anyone.’ I said hoping she would think of a way for me to tell her, so I could trust her.

‘Sweetheart, trust me, I won’t say a word, and what is this about, did you have an argument with Lorna-Kay and then hit her or something, did you rob a shop, did you kill someone?’ She kept asking loads of questions to try and get the answer out of me.

‘No, it’s nothing like that, to tell you the truth, I was sexually abused okay, and you happy now I have told you, and you can’t tell anyone at all, especially mum or Shane please.’ I just stormed off to my room. Carla-Louise followed me. She just came in and hugged me.

‘Don’t worry sweetheart, I won’t tell anyone, just tell me who did it to you, and answer me truthfully, don’t blame it on someone else.’ I didn’t know what to do because the boy that did it went to the same school as her and she would know who he was. And if she found out that it was him, she would say something to him and then he would definitely kill me for telling her. I just didn’t know what to say, she sat beside me and waited for an answer.

‘I can’t tell you who did it, or he will kill me for telling you, because you know who he is, because he went to the same school as you.’ I just sat there hoping she wouldn’t go off her head to tell her who it was. She just looked at me, and said,

‘Come here, look outside the window, have you noticed how that boy there, in his window keeps staring at you, he’s called Josh Bennett isn’t he, I went to school with him. He keeps looking at you; he might have a crush on you. He’s same age as me, but he seems to be interested in you.’ She looked at me and smiled. I think she thought she was making me feel better, but what she didn’t know is that it was him that did it.

I was supposed to of had my period today, but I didn’t, maybe I’m pregnant. I just kept thinking to myself, what if I am, what I would do with a baby, and to someone that doesn’t deserve to be a father. I have decided to go to the doctors the next day to get checked.

‘Carla-Louise, what you don’t understand is that I’m not interested in boys anymore, because most of them are dickheads and I’m not ready for a relationship.’ I said just thinking about what I should do. She looked at me and smiled. And said,

‘Oh, I’m sorry, I should of known, of course you’re not going to be ready for a relationship, sweetheart, I’m so stupid, I was just trying to make you feel better.’ She said coming up to me to give me a hug. I hugged her back, and we were just sat there hugging for ages. My twin sister just walked in through the front door and Carla-Louise asked if Lorna-Kay knew about it, and I said no, that I couldn’t tell her, because it was too upsetting.

‘You know what I will make your favourite tea, today, Spaghetti Bolognaise, yeah, will that make you feel better, sweetheart?’ She asked looking at me and wiping my tears away.

‘Actually, that’s not my favourite anymore, because that’s the meal I had with the boy which did this to me.’ I said starting to cry again.

‘I’m sorry chick, I didn’t know, well what’s your new favourite then, and I will make it for you?’ She asked trying to make me feel better and she was also trying to make herself not sound so bad.

‘My new favourite is tuna pasta bake, I just love it, and I hope you know how to make it.’ I said cheering up a bit.

‘Don’t worry, I know how to make it and yep sure, I will make it for you and would you like to come and help me make it?’ She said, holding onto my hand.

‘Yeah sure, I would love to come and help make it.’ I said jumping up from off my bed. Me and my sister, Carla-Louise made our way downstairs to make our family tea. Lorna-Kay was downstairs sat watching T.V. She came into the kitchen and saw that we were making tea.

‘What we having then?’ She asked looking at what we were getting from out of the cupboards.

‘We are having tuna pasta bake for tea today.’ She said smiling at me. Lorna-Kay just looked at us funny and said,

‘Ok, what about Spaghetti Bolognaise, that’s what we always have on a Saturday?’ She asked looking confused.

‘Well we have decided to make tuna pasta bake, the new thing we have now every Saturday.’ Carla-Louise said looking at me. I couldn’t talk, because I was scared I would start crying again.

‘Why have we changed it?’ Lorna-Kay asked looking towards me. ‘Because we are getting bored of having Spaghetti Bolognaise.’ She replied starting to put the pasta into a pan. Lorna-Kay just said fine and went back into the living room. After about an hour of making the tea, it was finally done and ready for us to eat.

‘Lorna-Kay your tea is ready, come and get it if you want it.’ Shouted Carla-Louise, we all sat down at the dining table. It was very silent, no one talked. We hadn’t heard from our parent or parents, which was weird, they always gave us a call. Because of mum’s job she moves from country to country, so we hardly get to see her, because she investigates a lot of things for science and to find out what’s wrong with these certain people in the other countries, I forgot what you call it. My step dad is in the army, so we don’t see him anyway. We have only met him once, which was this year before my mum went to France, for her job. She’s so lucky to be over there in France, having a good time I hope.

‘So, when’s mum coming home Carla-Louise?’ Lorna-Kay asked looking across the table at her. Carla-Louise looked up.

‘I don’t know; I have heard she’s a meant to be coming back next weekend.’ She said starting to eat again. I looked across at Lorna-Kay,

‘So, did you buy that dress from town then?’ I finally got my voice back. She looked at me, like as if she was guilty of something.

‘I’m sorry I lied, I used it to buy mum a present for when she gets back.’ She said looking down, like as if I was going to shout at her.

‘What do you mean you’re sorry, I would of lent you it anyway even if it was for mum or not, just as long as you would pay me it back, so what did you buy mum then chick.’ I said looking at her and smiling.

‘Oh ok and thanks sis. I bought her something to remember me by, which is a necklace and a bracelet with mum’s initial on them both.’ She said looking up and smiling at me.

‘Aww that’s well nice, wished I stayed in town now, so that I could of got mum something special too, oh well I have got all this week yet, I will have to go a day after school or something.’ I said looking at Carla-Louise.

‘What you looking at me for?’ She asked confusingly.

‘Because I want to know, if you would take me one of the days of this week to town, if you don't mind that is.’ I said giving her a big smile.

‘Yeah, of course I will chick, I would never say no to that, because I wouldn’t want you to go down town on your own anyway.’ She said giving me a big hug and a big kiss. Lorna-Kay was giving me a dead eye like as if she was trying to figure something out.

‘So Hayley-Jade, why did you leave the bus, I know it’s just not because of me saying those things about you and that boy, come on there has to be another reason.’ She said laughing. I looked at Carla-Louise and thought to myself if I say why to Lorna-Kay that she would take the mess out of me like she already does.

‘I can’t tell you why and please don’t say anything again about it, because you would only take the mess out of me for it like you always do and it’s because I didn’t want to be anywhere near that boy, okay because he did something to me that really hurt me okay. And please don’t even mention his name.’ I shouted, I didn’t mean to shout at her like that. I stormed off to my bedroom, away from her. She looked like she was about to cry, I didn’t mean to shout at her like that. I just started crying and looked outside to see that the boy was still looking at me through the window.

‘What was she talking about?’ Carla-Louise asked Lorna-Kay,

‘On the bus earlier, we were meant to be going to town together, but we saw this boy that she had been seeing on the bus and I started taking the mess saying oh look Hayley-Jade it’s your lover boy and she was going on about how they wasn’t together even though she spent the night there and she said they wasn’t together anymore because they had an argument, and I took the mess again saying oh my god, just because you have had a little argument doesn’t mean you stop seeing each other. So I kind of really upset her and I can see why she’s mad at me.’ She said sounding really apologetic. Carla-Louise looked really confused and then realized it must of been the lad I was talking about earlier.

‘Do you know this boy’s name?’ She asked looking at the stairs to see if I was coming downstairs or not. &

Submitted: January 17, 2014

© Copyright 2022 HayleyJade. All rights reserved.

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