Sayonara

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
This story is my own gloomy experience of parting with my little sister...

Submitted: May 13, 2011

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Submitted: May 13, 2011

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She was still beautiful. A little more soft, a little more gratifying. I saw her angelic wet eyes as she waved me a goodbye. She was my little eight year old sister, Nishi. She was going away from me, again. As, I saw her departing, I became confused, unconscious and got drowned in a flood of memories. Memories of my past, my childhood…when she was with me. Close to me. Close to my heart.
I remember all of it vividly. It was the 5th of July, 2003. The sun wasn’t bright and beautiful like it always appears to be. The birds weren’t singing their best songs. The grasses weren’t moving as if doing a dance. Everything was buttoned up. It seemed as if Nature had had a fight with God. Everything at my home too was offbeat and bizarre that day. I was feeling low watching all this weird stuff. Then, on a spur of moment, I saw my mother crying. I went to her and tapped on her shoulder. I looked at her tear-stained face and asked her the reason for the same. She didn’t say a word and walked away. I felt my eyes wet. I went to my brother and told him what I saw. He, unlike my mother, pushed me away and dictated me to go. I, brokenhearted and confused, went to my sister, Nishi. She was five months old and was sleeping like a fairy. I gazed at her and touched her to make sure that the beautiful piece was my sister, my little sister. And soon, I started of how I would dress her when she grows up or how would we go to the mall for shopping or how we’ll fight over petty things. I felt good...and content. I fell asleep.
“..I don’t know how I’ll be able to live without her. And, what will we say to Honey? Oh God, help me. I am doing well for someone else, aren’t I? I should not be crying.”I woke up, startled. I knew that voice. It was my mommy. But, why was she weeping? I rattled out of my bed and went to her. She looked at me with her big panic-stricken eyes. She knew that I heard what she was saying to my dad. I just scrutinized her. She got hold of my hand and took me to my room. She initiated, “Baby, now listen to me very carefully. As you know very well that your Kalpana Aunty has no child. She is deprived of the world’s most exquisite feeling, which is to have a baby. So, we must help her, right?” I nodded with my perturbed face. She smiled and continued, “Look Honey, you have an elder brother and I have two lovely children. So, we should…we can…um…give Nishi to your Aunty...” Silence crept in between us. I looked at the broken tiles of my room. The walls appeared to be grey. “Why?” I finally spoke. She held my hand and explained, “Honey, God has given us a fascinating life. While we live for ourselves, we must also try to live for others. We must help the needy-they teach this to you in School, right? So, don’t you think that God will be happy and add a plus point for us in his register if we help Aunty?” I stood up, looked at her and ran away.
I ran away to my little sister who would be going away from me in a few hours. I took her into my arms and caressed her. She opened her stunning eyes and took my heart away. I melted. I smiled. I cried. I touched her delicate fingers and she intertwined her fingers with mine. I touched her little feet which would learn to walk…without me. I had planned so much and I saw it all going waste. She closed her eyes and I fell into deep thoughts. I was only 10. Was I allowed to think so much? I gulped. I closed my eyes.
Finally, my Aunty came. She was looking happy and her eyes were glittery. I had never seen this part of hers. She always appeared to be strict and coldhearted to me. I saw my mommy with Nishi in her arms. Kalpana Aunty looked at Nishi just like a starving child looks at a piece of cake. My mother kissed Nishi and controlled her tears and handed her to Aunty. I hated mommy at that time. I hated Kalpana Aunty. I hated my family. I hated God. I saw Nishi splitting away from me. It felt that she would never return. I knew that she would return soon but she wouldn’t be my real sister anymore. She will be my cousin, and that’s the worst part. Soon, she was gone. I cursed myself for not hugging her. I lamented, but no one listened. I just imagined what my life would be without her. Barren. Loveless. Purposeless.
Days passed and I learnt to live life. Everything became normal soon. One fine day, while I was writing a verse on mothers, something struck me. I realized, my mother is not a bit less than God. She gave her own little doll away for my Aunty who had no child. My mommy has a soul which lives for the happiness of others. She rarely thinks about herself. She is a true human being and God must have taken ages to mould her into a person so perfect. She has a heart which beats for her family and her loved ones. She has taught me how to live, laugh and love. She is my angel, my miracle. And, I thinking about this ran to her and hugged her tight. I whispered into her ears, “Mommy, you’re exceptional. I love you”. And, as always, her magnificent eyes got wet. “I love you too, my girl”, my angel said.
 


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