Coercive Control

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

Coercive Control -- a crime in at least three countries now.
Cover image: pixabay.com

Coercive Control

 

Coercive Control is formerly defined as psychological abuse in intimate relationships that causes serious alarm or distress that has a substantial adverse effect on a person’s day-to-day life, manifesting in a pattern of intimidation or humiliation involving psychological or emotional abuse.

On the second day of January 2019, a new law was established, designed to tackle the more pernicious and far less obvious effects of this type of behaviour. Ireland is the third country in the world, following England and Scotland, to introduce such a law.

This is very much about repeated behaviours rather than those of one or two instances. Some things that on the face of it can appear very small, when suffered continuously can have a huge impact on the victim. The most common areas of attack are in freedom of movement and freedom of association, but are by no means confined to these two aspects.

 

"If somebody knows you well, they know your ‘crumple zone’ in a sense and they know how to put you down." Margaret Martin, Director Of Women’s Aid in Ireland.

 

Weight and body image are a frequent target, as are family dynamics. Anything that can undermine one’s self-respect and self-esteem. Public humiliation is an action that is often put in to play, the abuser if called out claiming it was just a misjudgement in humor.

It is also worth noting that not all abused are female. Also, not all abusers are husbands or partners; children over the age of eighteen can also be guilty of this crime.

It can be hard to spot, even harder to acknowledge, when you are the victim of Coercive Control. As behaviour worsens and each iteration becomes the new normal, low self-esteem is just one factor that can stop the victim from seeing the reality of the situation, and instead accepting the abuse as being true.

Should someone decide to confront an abuser, they might be met with threats of murder, or more likely that should they report the behaviour or leave the victim would then be responsible for the abuser’s suicide.

The law is a step forward to those that dare to pursue it. Not easy to prove though, and like reports of rape can be exceedingly painful on a personal level to go through with. It is also worth noting that the very people that this law is set up to help are the least likely to make a report in the first place, especially if the acused is their own child.


Submitted: June 09, 2019

© Copyright 2022 hullabaloo22. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

Mike S.

Sounds like what Trump's doing to America and the world, excellent, Hull!

Sun, June 9th, 2019 5:55pm

Author
Reply

It's a bit more on a personal level than that, Mike. There's another word, I think, that describes Trumps actions...I allow anyone to fill in their own.

Sun, June 9th, 2019 11:33am

AdamCarlton

How many cases have been highlighted objectively by cameras secreted in apparent clocks and other paraphernalia? Easily obtained from online retailers.

Can make the case unarguably.

Sun, June 9th, 2019 6:44pm

Author
Reply

That is very true, I guess.
The problem with this law, and a lot of similar ones, is that the ones that need to for the most part won't report a thing, even when they know that they could, maybe even should.
I put quite a bit of research in to this so thanks so much for taking the time to give it a read, Adam.

Sun, June 9th, 2019 11:48am

Sue Harris

As you say, Hully, if its the child who is abusing the parent, it is far less likely to be reported.

Sun, June 9th, 2019 8:05pm

Author
Reply

Definitely. And then there are times when there is more than one abuser simultaneously, and the conflicting demands are impossible to meet.
Thanks so much for giving this a read, Sue.

Sun, June 9th, 2019 1:39pm

Mike S.

Certain people could use a nanny to keep them from sounding idiotic.

Sun, June 9th, 2019 9:11pm

Author
Reply

Thanks, Mike!!

Sun, June 9th, 2019 2:14pm

LE. Berry

What you are addressing here hullabaloo22 is a very subtle space of active, dynamic emotion which affects many people. Your point of self esteem is important; how can someone can meet it outside of the immediate family? I believe school plays a crucial role in that development when we are children, where teachers as mentor can help someone get beyond this type of up close and destructive abuse...

Mon, June 10th, 2019 12:26am

Author
Reply

A lot of people that suffer from this kind of abuse had very negative school experiences too, so maybe you have a point, at least for some.
Thanks for reading.

Mon, June 10th, 2019 12:28am

ratwood2

it would seem to me that jealousy was the most common form of coercive control all done in the name of love. I have never know anyone to justify jealousy except by saying that it is only because of love. I feel that extreme jealousy needs to be added as one of the markers for coercive control. When will other countries accept and create laws of this type to at least provide an option for the oppressed.

Tue, June 11th, 2019 3:38am

Author
Reply

Jealousy would certainly be the cause of a lot of this abuse, you're quite right. The problem with this law, especially when applied to grown children, would be that most abused this way, even when they realize it, are the very ones who won't use it.
I thought it was kind of unbelievable that so many other countries have no laws against this truly pernicious abuse.
Thanks so much for giving this a read.

Tue, June 11th, 2019 12:40am

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