secret box

Reads: 2276  | Likes: 4  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 14

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Booksie Classic

about a secret box

 

I have secret little box colored red under my comfortable bed. Every one dies to know about it, but no one ever could
 
When i feel sad, upset and especially hopeless I open it. I open it and fly to another world, to the dream and magic land!
 
 
I go to a place that I can fly, eat all kinds of food without getting fat, have a magic wand and have the most beautiful things that no one ever could imagin them.
 
Sometimes I decide to tell the world about my wonderful box,but I feel jealous, I just want to enjoy by myself and feel the test of the unique happiness by my own!
 
 
So, do you want to know about my red box?
Do you want to see the wonder of magic and the incredibly unique things!
 
It is called secret box
You can't know
 
 
You will never know


Submitted: May 24, 2011

© Copyright 2021 i.Reem. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

i.Reem

i had to re-do it again because it disappered with no reasons and i lost your comments XD

hope you like it (again) ;p

Tue, May 24th, 2011 5:51am

Frank Ramtahal

I like your story about this 'Secret Box'. The title is very interesting and it encourages the reader to read to know what is in this red box hidden under your bed. The flow of the ideas is great. This red box reminds me of the Wardrobe in the story 'The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe' by C. S. Lewis. Instead of a picture of a person, I am of the opinion that a red box would be more appropriate.

Tue, May 24th, 2011 11:29am

Author
Reply

yes you are right, I already changed it but it doesn't want to apper ;p

I'm so galde that you like my stories :)

thank you (L)

Tue, May 24th, 2011 6:45am

Frank Ramtahal

Check your mail box for the secret box.

Fri, May 27th, 2011 6:07pm

Author
Reply

yub i did ^^

thank you ;p

Fri, May 27th, 2011 11:50pm

arun

Ha ha. Ok ok, I'm not in the list of those who would die to know what the secret box holds. No, I'm not interested. Not. No. I don't want to know... I don't want... I don't... I don... I... hey maybe you can tell me...
Maybe I... I want to know.... ugh, Only if you wish...
Maybe,... No... Pls say it. I'm dying to know it...

I think you got what my comments mean. Nice work. All the best.
Keep writing.
Moreover you should have made it a poem rather than short story. Your other story rocks.

Sat, May 28th, 2011 8:05am

Author
Reply

lol ^^ don't try i won't tell you ;p

thanks for commenting Arun ;)that's soo sweet

Sat, May 28th, 2011 7:52am

Andrew Willey

Fantastic for being so short. Does this box have a lock that only you can open? I like to thonk it does

Wed, June 1st, 2011 5:16pm

Author
Reply

haha yea it does ;p

but it's not a key, it's something else, something magically !!

Wed, June 1st, 2011 10:26am

senior

OUTSTANDING job!!

Thu, June 2nd, 2011 9:22pm

Author
Reply

ouh thanxxx a lot :$

Fri, June 3rd, 2011 2:14am

Ona Whim

I don't want to know what's in it. I WANT one. Haha!

Well done.

Whim

Fri, June 3rd, 2011 10:51pm

Author
Reply

haha.. believe me you have one , and u will discover that one day ;p

thanks for the comment :)

Sat, June 4th, 2011 12:16am

patspoems

I loved this short story - my kind of thing. A bit on the lines of my poem "Come with me on a magical journey". Always wonderful to transport to a magical place even if it's only in our dreams ..... Pat

Mon, June 6th, 2011 5:42am

Author
Reply

yes you r right ;p

thanks a lot Pat

Sun, June 5th, 2011 11:10pm

EdwardJBradleySr

reemoOka:

Interesting, fanciful, imaginative, mysterious, unusual and well written. Excellent choice and treatment of theme. Enjoyable reading.

Gave it an "I Like It" vote. As with your other postings. All well deserved.

Presentation Issues:

1. Skip a line between intended paragraphs.

2. Start a new paragraph each time a character may speak, in quotes "", in his/her turn.

This will make your writing more inviting to readers. Increasing both your readership and popularity.

Hope this helps.

Thank you for becoming a fan. Appreciative and grateful. You are most considerate, thoughtful and kind.

Happy trails,

Ed Bradley.

Tue, June 7th, 2011 4:30am

Author
Reply

thank you so Much :)

you can't imagine how your comment means to me ^^

Mon, June 6th, 2011 10:29pm

kreeko0o

o0o0o0o0o0o0o i wanna look into it ... please let me ... i need it h3 .... you can trust me i wont tell anyone bout it ... we can be together ... h3 ...
sweetheart i loved thi story ... i really thought of it and i think it a great way to calm down ... your so bright honey ... keep up the good work ...
loved it hun

Tue, June 14th, 2011 5:16pm

Author
Reply

ouhhh thaaaanxxx !!! you are so0o0o sweeeeeeeett (K)(K)

Tue, June 14th, 2011 12:55pm

Wednesday

hmm very intriguing! Nice job!

Wed, June 15th, 2011 11:05pm

Author
Reply

thanks 4 the comment ;p

Wed, June 15th, 2011 4:39pm

Skyscraper

wow this was interesting :) I have a secret box? Well maybe... but hey I have booksie does that count? haha

Mon, August 22nd, 2011 3:00pm

Author
Reply

haha yes sure ;p

thanks a lot dear:)

Tue, September 13th, 2011 7:35am

Richmaggs

Great little story. Everyone has their own private little box - somewhere to go when they feel low! I enjoyed this ... thankyou!

Thu, December 15th, 2011 5:21pm

Author
Reply

you are most welcome :D:D

thanks a lot for the comment

Fri, December 16th, 2011 3:21am

Dean Talbot

Loved it!!!! The story captures your attention from the git go!! Outstanding!

Wed, October 3rd, 2012 7:56pm

Author
Reply

Thank you SO much :D!!!

Sat, November 10th, 2012 9:41am

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