All he loves He loves alone

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
A poem about my ex fiance who loved loneliness more than anything.

Submitted: January 22, 2013

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Submitted: January 22, 2013

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He couldn't be more special
more different then anybody
he got those magnificent movements
as he sits
as he's asleep
a man you got to love
by only one look in his eyes
his name i remember forever
he not takes me halfway
only whole
 
never stopped believing i could make him love me
inside i know he wants
also know he can´t
and all he love,he loves alone
 
more then a morning kiss
more then a hug
more then together
more then me
 
afraid for the leash of commitment
the fear against colder nights
decision well taken
sometimes believe he's right
love worth the pain of forever?
the hurt of missing 
is it?
or ain't it?
Yes!
 
i can´t imagine life without love
a kiss without feeling
passionless sex
sacrifices need to be taken
even for just a minute
he
he can´t do it
made a promise to himself
that his heart would never be broken
and all he love,he loves alone
 
by hisself he watch the sun rise while making his morning tea
he doesn't mind
its all he ever knew
no place in his life for missing
already not in the earliest of days
i wonder 
would he ever cry?
cry for the things he miss
missed
cry for all the things he pushed away
carried away
for him for me
 
i wonder
would he really be so happy there all alone?
does he never think what if?
what if for one day i wasn't on my own
no! 
he's too busy with the daily rush
to ask himself questions
even if he find some time to think
he's too proud 
too strong to admit he need someone
he doesn't! 
it feels good to be free
he can sail in the wind
without someone telling him anything
and all he love,he loves alone
 
from the birds that fly across him
the music he listens
only one thing seems to touch him
a light reaction as my lips touch his
guess it makes him forget for a moment
forget about fear
forget about his self written rules
 
if only i could reach him
deeper then i already did
i can´t!
tried the best i could
gave him ´Me´
all i had left
spended so much time trying to rescue what cannot be rescued
i failed 
how easy would it be
if love could be brought to him by just my touch
well nothing is as perfect as i wanted it to be
giving up 
the only thing i need to push myself to
no! 
refuse to do this
never truly never i let him slip through
 
one year 
past like a painful day
sometimes i call him
moments he picks up
find myself standing in that room with him again
he's away i can not breath him in
´I think of you´
he says briefly
all i need
all i need to make the rain go away
i ask him how his life go's
of course he never answers
he lives life day by day
and all he loves,he loves alone
\"\"


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