blah blahs of a pretty damn day

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic

crazy, silly self... don't forget stupid

after writing blah blahs last night.  i feel refreshed. woke up late in the morning and felt quite good... i did my morning rituals, ate and went to work. i walked all the way to work. hahaha, need to loose major pounds.. 

at work, sat on a chair, had my cofee..... hahaha.. fuck this, i need to get thin. well it was a nice morning, but was lonely. my workers are still asleep, they finished work at  6 am so i let them sleep. excused... as i was in front of my laptop, one of the boys, i call the workers boys as still they were quite young, turned on the radio and listened to these silly songs.. damn.. the feelings i felt last night was slowly creeping up on me... those bastards. oh fuck.. need to stop this, need to gather my thoughts and forget about last night.

but i can't stop thinking of her... i don't know if this is healthy for me, am i being a stalker? or i just love her really.. stupid. asking silly questions i can't even answer my own silliness.. is that a word?? silliness?? 

sometimes she comes here to visit, when she's bored at home. we chat, talk mindless topics. well at least i know i'm entertaining her. i'm happy when she comes here to visit, i always look forward to the next visit. .. but, as i said, she only comes when she's bored. most of the times my stupid self always glances on the window, waiting for her to come... wahahha... i stole again a glance at the window as i'm writing.. hey, she might come. ... cheesy stupid fuck... wahahha

when i come home later, i wish i can see her and invite her over to the house for some chit chat. that's enough to make my day. just 5 minutes will be enough, though after that five minutes i'll be wanting for more time... lol. wish we can talk later, tell silly stories or stupid jokes.. just a laugh will be nice, damn even a smirk will do. i wish she will hug me cause damn as hell want to hug her and cuddle her, whisper to her that i love her and answers that she loves me too, or tell me to go fuck myself wahahah.... wishfull thinking.. stupid me... 

well, over all its been a pretty damn day, at least for now... this writing helps me.. i can express my feeling with ease. why did i not thought abou this when i was younger. it helps a fucking lot... i think.. wahahah. i like it writing it here where strangers can read my blah blahs. the thought of people reading my shit as if they were listening to me. get some fucking symphatizers or haters or "i don't care what you write" kind of people to listen to me. this feels's a pretty day, it could be perfect if i see her now or later.. whatever... loving someone makes you crazy, pretty damn crazy and stupid.... but it's a nice day.. i love her.. that's all that matters...

Submitted: January 12, 2014

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