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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
forgive me please.

Submitted: May 30, 2008

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Submitted: May 30, 2008




You know Iam very much annoyed with women. Right from my childhood there are many instances, where I needed small but critical help but the adjacent ladies never chose to help me. Therefore I made it a point not to help women when they require help. I even did it on many occasions. Once in a family chat, I told this and my mother who was listening to me from the kitchen came and stood before me with a smile on her lips and hands on her hips and said, ”Dear, Iam a woman, have I not done anything useful to you so far?” It was then my grandfather introduced a wonderful concept to me. Im writing now to share that idea with you.

According to him, when something bad is done to a person, they carry it with them to deliver on somebody else. He believes revenge is instinctual. But when there occurs a situation where the victim could not revenge back, may be due to social reasons, reasons of power, worrying about further consequences, worry about further loss of energy, time or money, due to more important other issues or for that matter any reason of his own, he carries the trouble done to him with him. But the problem is people don’t just carry them for ever. They will release it on the earliest possibility they get on somebody and get relieved of their burden.

Say when a lawyer cheats us & we are not able to revenge back, then our anger becomes generalized. We think all lawyers are bad and when we get a chance to relieve our burden on another innocent lawyer, we may happily do it. But the real problem starts here. That lawyer is victimized and he now carries a burden to deliver on somebody else. This chain will progress unless somebody intervenes. Do we know how many such progressions are on flow around us right now? Can we prevent ourselves from tripping over one such trouble progression? Actually, believe me, we all are tripping over such problem sequences everyday. It may be experienced as small as a denial of a smile or a small insult without reason or may be as large as refusal to help at a critical moment. Most people don’t actively do anything to deliver their burden. They usually remain passive when somebody similar to the trouble maker is in trouble.

This sequence has the tendency to spread in geometric progression ie when a family member is troubled and no revenge back, all the members of the family take the burden and start a trouble sequence and eagerly wait for an opportunity to deliver their burden. For eg. When a doctor cheats a person, the whole family hates all doctors.

Is it dangerous? Is it of any social significance? The answer is, if not always, may be.

If we misbehave with a doctor & if he is not able to retaliate, he may show that on his next patient. And if he is critically ill, it may even cost his life.

If a passenger misbehaves with a bus driver, he may show it on driving.

If a factory worker is troubled, he may decrease the quality of the product a little bit which may have further consequences.

As the population is more, the numbers of trouble sequences are more because each single person has the potential to initiate a trouble sequence. And every deliverance decreases the sovereignty of the society a wee bit.

We can see this when we go outstation. In some cities people are benevolent and in some cities they are indifferent. There is a single overall behavior prevailing in any group of people because when one behavior is shown to people they reflect the same & in due course it becomes the general behavior of that society.

People also carry the good done to them with them. But carrying benevolence is not a burden. So we forget them easily and fail to deliver them on others. But carrying a trouble is a burden which has to be delivered on someone to ease our heart.

Now is there a solution to this problem? The options are either the problem should be solved or the problem maker should be eliminated. The latter option is meaningless and ludicrous. The former option is possible only if somebody breaks the sequence & stops its progression ie somebody has to forgive all the trouble done to him for a greater good.

Is it possible for all of us to forgive all the trouble done to us for the betterment of the society so that we and our loved ones don’t have to trip over any trouble sequences? When I asked my friends their opinion, they said, “It’s easy to say”.


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