Thoughts of my day

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Sometimes I just need to off load get things off my chest today is that day all the thoughts of the day put down in words.

Submitted: March 11, 2010

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Submitted: March 11, 2010

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Thoughts of My Day.,

The day begins and you get up without even realizing that the thoughts are starting to flow through your mind all the decisions you make hundreds subconsciously, there and believe me before the end of the day you will only think of one your head hitting that pillow and if you are lucky sleep, we dream we think we function on auto pilot alot of the time or at least I do I think a great deal and I think deeply it distracts me at times and instead of thinking of one thing millions of things are floating around in my head, all the things I have to do everyday it is the same for everyone I am sure, all the chores the household things the shopping the ironing the dinner juggling the bills and getting the kids to school and still finding enough time for yourself after college and exams work a couple of years ago I would have thought this impossible and now here I am doing some of the things I have always wanted to do.

I do wonder if I spend my time wisely it is more a question of doing something with the time I have like going to the gym or swimming reading something solitary that I can do alone, I like my own company it is peaceful but also rare, I have learnt though that if you want to do something good with your life you have to want to it has to be something you enjoy doing something you have a passion for the one thing for me is writing I have reached forty and I always thought I would know what it is I wanted out of life and that I would have it all figured out wrong still looking I envy those people who know what it is that they want from life the career path they have chosen like they wereborn to do it that raw talent that some people have where they don't even have to try it just is.

I heard recently that you can not have it all, well I am all or nothing so I guess I will always feel dissapointed which is something I am trying to change, it's just that if you are not that good at something why bother trying you are never going to be anything other than average, I never wanted to be average I always wanted to be somebody this sounds so stuck up which I am not, I just wanted to make a difference, and to my family I am sure I do but to change the world, I suppose if I change the way I think I can change the world for everybody who is in my life and be satisfied with that.,

I am still trying to find myself and I am fraustrated with the answers maybe I am not asking the right questions?

I have experience of life and maybe that is all I need really wisdom to make choices and live with them and have freewill to change my future and destiny should I so wish to and to live in the moment which do any of us really do this when I look at my children I am so blessed to have them so I revel in the glory of just watching them grow.


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