Dying In Your Arms Tonight.
We won't be missed
Once we're gone
_
So lets do it today
By tonight we'll fade
_
I'm feeling so blue
Nobody cares what I come to
_
Take this step with me
Baby, I know it'll set us free
_
Loving you shouldn't hurt so bad
It's slowly driven me mad
_
So tonight at the barn it'll be
Only when we're gone will they finally see
_
That our love was true
I was meant only for you
_
In hay blocks we lay
I get the feeling it'll be okay
_
As I take away your pain
And you take away mine again
_
You slide the knife across my wrist
Lean over and steal my breath with a kiss
_
Then cut your lifeline with the blade
Take me in your arms, together we fade
_
Your heartbeat fills my ear
We rest in peace, our end is near
_
Hand in hand we knock at deaths door
With wings we fly off the floor
_
Life's back on track, all went with plan
I couldn't have died in the arms of a better man
Submitted: April 03, 2012
© Copyright 2021 iola ried. All rights reserved.
Comments
This is tragic, star-crossed lovers; always a great plot line. It reads a bit like a song. I love reading the work of young writers, there's a lot of potential here.
Sat, April 14th, 2012 11:06pmooh you know if you die in hay the hay keeps your body warm and your finders are in hopes that you are still alive .. still I guess your lovers would have blood everywhere giving a slight clue all is not well
I liked it very much
this is amazing, very well written :)
Mon, April 23rd, 2012 7:52pmAh, nothing better than a dark love in a beautifully crafted poem.
Mon, May 7th, 2012 6:21ami like it, the flow was like a heart beat nice and steady. very good.
Mon, May 21st, 2012 12:22amwow... I love it.. so much emotion and love... a great write. you have talent :)
Tue, May 29th, 2012 12:30pmI love it as well. It is pure love so simple. Well written.
Sat, July 28th, 2012 1:19amif i was a girl i would've cried. but i'm not a girl. haha jk great job. I loved it. heaps of emotions in simple lines. great job
Mon, July 30th, 2012 11:03amamazing, what love can do:) beautiful poem
Wed, August 8th, 2012 1:08amSimple yet stunning!
I love the romance of this, the newest comparioson is a serious Katniss and Peeta but yeah, I would call this better than Hungergames.
Very well written. I could feel the emotion. I like it a lot!
Wed, August 15th, 2012 11:52pmWoah!!!! Tragic love...
Thu, August 23rd, 2012 3:48amThat's really good. Really sad though. Flows well and is very emotional. Good job, was moved by your poetry.
Mon, August 27th, 2012 8:53amI kind of held my breath and only realized that when i had come to the end.Think you can give a read to my poem "The demons inside my head"
This is amazing i don't usually read this kind of thing, but this changed my perspective.
Mon, August 27th, 2012 7:02pmYiour work has a sort of etherial feel to it weather its about love or death its just light and edgey
Thu, September 6th, 2012 11:03pmI like the way your works flow. They're eloquent, yet not too wordy. I enjoy them.
Tue, September 11th, 2012 3:15pmPrepare the ambulance cause i think im having a heart attack! or maybe its just my breath i cant catch hehe* Beautiful!!! I loved this!!!*
Wed, September 12th, 2012 2:07pmYet more of that special 'something incredibly real' that you bring to poetry, thank you again for sharing it with us
Sat, September 15th, 2012 10:26pmFacebook Comments
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Charles Mausolf
Nicely written. This has a rather mix of emotions, Kinda sad, but full of love.
Wed, April 4th, 2012 7:58pmAuthor
Reply
Thanks! And I'm glad you think so, it was what was intended =]
Wed, April 4th, 2012 2:14pm