I still wake up every morning reaching for the top of your head.
& Remembering all over again that you're gone forever and dead.
& Knowing it wasn't your choice but the choice if someone else.
& There was really nothing I could do about it.
'Cuz if I could rewind the sands of time I would've stayed up all night that night.
Just to make sure you didn't go out of the front door of that house.
Because even though you would've died anyway , maybe, it might've bought me some more time just to sit you down and REALLY EXPRESS to you how MUCH I loved you.
Because even though I told you it everyday, every second, I NEVER said it enough.
& Losing someone as precious as to were to me was really tough.
& I had a leak I the pipes of my eyes for years.
Sitting around thinking the repairman would never come to patch up MY tears.
Checking at your grave everyday hoping somehow we made a mistake and you were still alive down there.
Praying to god that this was just a nightmare and you'd get to see me get to highschool.
But you didn't and this is reality.
& In a way you were my first love and I lost you before I had you.
And now I'm a sophomore and I'm glad you,
Got to move on to the next stage of your existence,
Even if you,
Didn't get to see me move on to mine.
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