Simply Put

Reads: 568  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 1  | Comments: 0

More Details
Status: In Progress  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
Yes its cynical, and yes it needs work please chop me up. No I don't like capital "I" what makes me so special.

Submitted: October 20, 2016

A A A | A A A

Submitted: October 20, 2016



Simple, it's a funny word isn't it. The way we use it to describe so many things in life. It can be both derogatory and appreciative all in the same sentence if that's what one chooses.

Someone once called me a simple guy and I nearly blew a fuse, i'm almost positive she didn't mean any harm by it, and yet it still threw off my composure. Truth is that i am a really simple guy, i like my coffee black and taking showers as soon as i wake up, i like to read a book a week and play videogames for hours on end. With that being said i’m also very complex in a way, i'll never show my true feelings because i like to keep a calm and cool composure for no reason in particular. I change my mind on which direction my life is headed nearly fifty times a day, because i'm young enough to have such luxury. I read somewhere once that people get to a certain point in life where it's obvious the years behind them outnumber the ones ahead, and that they must start living no longer for themselves but instead for someone else such as; children, family, friends. It’s funny because i can never see myself being so selfless despite my age, because i am quite the opposite. I choose to take the more challenging path in life to prove to myself that i'm strong enough to persevere. For example i chose to move out of my mother's house at the age of 16 when i could have easily apologized to her for being an absolute shit, and lived worry, and debt free. When i was in a major car accident that totalled my car at age 17 i decided to buy a new 2012 honda, with a heavy car payment instead of a junker all cash.When i get major tickets i opt to pay in full, instead of payments like anny sensible member of society would choose.

There is a certain glorification in solving difficult situations that others my age would certainly run to the hills, or even worse their parents about. I can't help it, i love to struggle, it makes me feel like i am living life on my own terms, when really i desperately hope for some underlying structure. It's a vicious cycle and yet the instability is what keeps me from falling of the deep end.

I guess on the outside i like people to think that i am a simple guy, because that allows me to avoid developing reasons as to why i do the things that i do. However some aren't so easily fooled, and expose the man behind the curtain controlling the great and powerful Oz. They say things like “I think you just play stupid, because that's what you want people to think when we both know that's not true”. Its funny though because despite how right those individuals are they only make such accusations right before they walce right out of my life for good. As if their last words to me were supposed to mean more than the average farewells and goodbyes most others shit out towards each other.

Life is a game and some are just worse at it than others, not because they had the wrong hand dealt but because they never knew it was a game in the first place. Some choose to live it simply and others choose to live it on their own terms, and most live the only way they know falling in line, waiting for the next season of sports to come around. Right on schedule.

© Copyright 2019 Jacob_resendez. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments: