I Just Don't Think I Can Do It

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
These were some thoughts about a girl that I had the other night. I had plenty of time at hand and just began thinking and thinking and wondering 'what if's' and 'hows' and it kept running through my mind throughout the night and so, I felt that the best thing to do, would be to write these feelings I have down. That way, I'd hopefully be able to see for myself what was really bothering me and playing on my mind. I don't know if it will work, but writing always seems to make things better in a way. Sometimes... I just wish I had the courage.

Submitted: December 02, 2015

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Submitted: December 02, 2015

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I know that it is probably cowardly of me my love,

That I haven't the guts to tell you,

How I really do feel,

But what I feel for you just seems so true.

 

I see your beauty not only on the outside,

But also I see it radiate from within,

The things that you say and the things that you believe,

I love the fact that you are not one who likes to just fit in.

 

You seem so happy with the girl that you are,

You see the positives in life,

I admire your outlook and the goodness within your heart,

Whenever I hear your laughter, it's like darkness has turned to light.

 

You see the beauty in the simplicities of life,

You care little for money and material things,

I just cannot describe my feelings whenever I think of you,

If I didn't know any better, I'd have thought you were an angel without the wings.

 

So strange they are these feelings,

For when I think of you, I feel so happy,

I feel like nothing can bother me and away my woes fade,

If only I was certain, I'd ask you gladly.

 

But then my fears begin to emerge,

It is that fear of rejection that worries me,

I know that I should have the courage my sweet,

But when I think about asking you, my heart simply cries "run, flee!"

 

I really wish I could just tell you,

How I truly do feel about you my love,

But I guess I just cannot muster the courage,

Maybe I just need to man up and try my luck?

 

You are the sweetest girl that I know,

Thinking about you brings me such joy,

Maybe I'll end up missing my chance,

Maybe you'll end up finding another boy.

 

Maybe you'd think I was silly,

For having such feelings,

I ask myself whether it's just another phase,

Am I simply dreaming?

 

But they just feel so damn real,

Even as I write, my thoughts are on you,

I guess that until I ask the question,

I will never know whether you feel the same way too.

 

But I don't want our friendship to become burdened,

To become awkward because of me,

Are we merely destined to be friends,

Or is there more than what we simply see?

 

I guess that I'll never know my love,

My fears simply hold me back,

While I feel confident in other things,

This is certainly something where my confidence does lack.

 

I'm just happy that we are friends,

That you are part of my life,

That we talk and get on well,

Even though we don't always see eye to eye.

 

These feelings that I have may well fade overtime,

I have spent hours searching, I have even prayed,

For an answer or even guidance on what to do,

Maybe... Maybe just let come what may.

 -- James William Cooper


© Copyright 2020 James William Cooper. All rights reserved.

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