As I Am Also Forgiven

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Religion and Spirituality  |  House: Booksie Classic
grace writing

Submitted: December 27, 2009

A A A | A A A

Submitted: December 27, 2009



As I Am Also Forgiven

By Jeff Shumate © 2009


I sat and replayed the tape in my head.  How can she keep doing this to me, I wondered.  It was nothing more than unfaithfulness, hidden behind a lifestyle of business.  It seemed she was on a personal quest to put everything ahead of me, her own husband.  It was an avoidance at all costs to deal with the problems of our marriage, our lives.  I have experienced many different types of pain in my life; this one surely ate away at the core of my soul.  As my hurt deepened, anger was born.  Fueled by hurt and rage, I tried day after day to shed light on our dilemma.  She needed to know we couldn’t go on like this anymore.  We were in a ship, which sank daily, soon to end up cursed at the belly of the sea.  No matter what I tried nothing seemed to work.  Whether talking or yelling, kindness or cursing, it didn’t matter.  Left to my own devices, I always ended up with the same results—bewildered and alone.  I felt our days were soon to end.


Frustrated with my failures as a man, a husband, I fell to my knees and cried out to the Lord, “Why? What must I do? Please; help me!”  It was at this moment God decided to shed His glorious light upon me, a light these darkened eyes so desperately needed.  For some time now I had set aside my God, my Savior, for the lusts of this world.  Not all at once, but ever so slightly, a little at a time.  From my job to my personal life, things became more important to me than God did.  I had been unfaithful to the Lord.  I had abandoned Him for pleasures turned pain.  Traitor I was!  I cried out to God, I needed Him now more than anything, and He was still there for me.  Though I had been unfaithful to Him, God would never let me go.  I was forgiven in Christ the day I placed my faith in Him, and now, I was still forgiven in Christ.  That day I realized my God loves me and always will, no matter what my failures may be.


Trusting in the Lord, I had been given the answer I so desperately sought.  Just as my wife had abandoned me, I had abandoned my Lord.  I needed to forgive my wife as I am also forgiven in Christ.  I needed to do this daily, if not even moment-to-moment.  I must walk in Christ, loving my wife, even when I am not loved, and I needed God’s power to do this. There was going to be no one shot deal, no miraculous one-time healing in our marriage.  It had to come through trusting in Christ, a day at a time, no matter what happened. I needed to let God work in her just as He was working in me.  What the future would bring, I did not know, but whatever was to happen, I would continue resting in Him.



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