Just do it.

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
I am Gen Y; delayed gratification is not something that comes natural to us, this is an exploration of my personal procrastination and lack of self-motivation that some might connect and relate towards.

Submitted: June 29, 2011

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Submitted: June 29, 2011

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Just do it.

Sounds simple enough, doesn't it? Imagine if you did 'just do it, wouldn't life be a whole lot better? Why in reality though, is this not the case? What is that invisible magnetic-like force that is nagging at your heels begging for your attention when really you should be focusing your attention elsewhere? Why does it control so many people, so well? Is there an easy way to breakthrough this invisible magnetic force, or dare I say; use it? What if you were offered an answer to each of these questions and an opportunity to say yes to the last question? Surely you would jump at it? But what if this force stops you from that very opportunity? Sounds like a ridiculous predicament that is easily defeated by 'just doing it'. Here we are again, at the start.

Don't laugh at me, but that is exactly where I am right now, the start of the circle (where the fuck is that?). I am being pulled by that force away from the very thing that will teach me to control it and very easily change my life. I can break free from the force if there are other people involved, other students that are taking the same opportunity that I am. Even teachers with due dates will do the trick, grades or deadlines, but if I am alone and self reliant for punishment and sacrifice, then I fail. No, fail is the wrong word. Fail implies I tried. Sure, I have actually put some action in, but ultimately, for the most part, inaction is the prime reason for writing this and not a failure in action.

I keep telling myself that the start is the hard part and once I get over the speed bump that is standing at my feet then that's it. And it honestly feels that way. After three days of working on my goal exclusively then I am on top of the world, I am happy with myself and I am striving to become someone greater than I ever imagined I could or would become. And then it comes crumbling down. It’s that one moment; that lapse in judgment where you tell yourself you deserve one break, maybe some sport or other activity. The break is followed by  work or a night out with your mates. That's it, game over. I've gone from level 10 to level 0. Back to where I was before I even thought about starting; the start of the circle. And until I get a whack in the face again from the universe and start off on a tangent to the circle, then I continue around in the same fashion, waiting for something to happen. Waiting for either me or the universe to have one moment dedicated to revamping my motivation and push me to action. This has happened three times (in the last 3 months) so far and each moment is filled with amazing insight and a shift in perception. Each time I have realised the moment and refused to take it for granted and sprung to action like an impatient animal prowling its prey, often with unimaginable force and super-human strength that seemed to just spontaneously bring itself into existence (I will often combine my goal with the uberman sleep method (20 minute nap every 4 hours) and do up to 15 hours of my goal and sleep only two hours collectively per day to maximize my time for working on my goal and only one hour per day for free time). How many more of these kick-start moments will I get? Have I run out? Will they continue until I achieve my goal, getting stronger or weaker as they gain in number? I liken myself to an overweight dog with a goal of weight loss, who, instead of running, waits for his owner to throw him a stick, waiting so patiently and attentively for that stick to have its dance with gravity. How many more throws will the universe give me and how far will I have to run to get the stick? Will it be enough to push me to run farther, to run on my own? I should be saying; will I choose it to be enough to push me further. Should I begin to go out of my way to artificially create these moments somehow? No, that is impossible; it is not something that I can create. Although I feel I am once again close, nearing the event horizon; soon nothing will stop me; change within me will accelerate to those extreme speeds I have enjoyed before.

Or maybe I should just do it...


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