Waiting for Life

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Monologue trying to answer, or at least pose, one of the questions of life.

Submitted: September 28, 2007

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Submitted: September 28, 2007

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I spend most of my life waiting. Waiting for someone to do something. Waiting for something to happen. Waiting for a moment of joy, pleasure, or pain, some emotion. I'm a reactionary. I do not act on things. I only react to things that have already happened. I spend an hour waiting for a second of emotion. I'm going to waste away waiting. It'll be the death of me. But waiting is not living is it? If I'm not really living then am I really dead? I'm breathing but does that really qualify as life?

I'm dead. I want to live, but I'm waiting for the moment that I can start. Waiting forever in death to begin life. Wonderful paradox, isn't it?

I've been searching for myself. Trying to find the thing that can make me live, but I can't find it. There's no place, no object, no ideal, no person to live for. I'm drowning in waiting and lost in a search for something that cannot be found. What am I missing that everyone else has? Or does anyone really have it? Am I just the only one who sees that its missing?

What are you living for? How long can we wait? What can we do instead of waiting? Can we do something to distract ourselves? Is all this a distraction? A temporary object for our attention?

I can't wait any longer to live. I have to live, or make my death a reality. I need something to fill this empty waiting.


© Copyright 2018 Jonathan Childers. All rights reserved.

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