No one seems to understand my pain,
Until you have cried in the rain.
Softly,
Silently.
Putting life on pause.
All of the lies,
I am glad I never heard,
All of the lies,
All of the nonsense.
Scribbles,
Fragments,
Softly,
Silently.
No one seems to understand my pain,
Until you have cried in the rain.
Swiftly,
Mindlessly.
Putting your life on hold.
All of the pain,
How much I felt,
All of the pain,
All of the regret.
Pieces,
Memories,
Swiftly,
Mindlessly.
No one seems to understand my pain,
Until your left in the rain.
Suddenly,
Painfuly.
Putting your life into focas.
All of the love,
I will always remember,
All of the love,
Burned into my brain.
Scars,
Flash backs,
Suddenly,
Painfuly.
hollydar
This made me want to give you a hug and tell you you are not alone - however you must feel that you are sometimes. I was an only child and always wanted a big brother and the relationship you had with yours sounds so very special, just the kind I always dreamed of having. Nothing or nobody can take all the special times and all the love you shared away from you, that will live on till you meet again. Be strong - he would have wanted that and keep writing your wonderful poetry in his honour. I, for one, feel privileged that you are sharing it with us. God bless. Pat x
Thu, July 8th, 2010 6:05amAuthor
Reply
Thank you so much Pat, you have no idea how much your kind, thoughtful words mean to me. I wrote this right after he died, and sometimes the pain is so bad that it is hard to bare. It comes in waves, some days are always going to be better than others though. I know that I'm not alone anymore, now that I have been to countless greif groups for teens and workshops for youth depression. No one is ever going to know exactly how I feel because no one had the same connection that I had with him, but I do know that there are people out there who know what I speak of and are here to help. You are a wonderful women with a kind heart. There are so many people, mostly adults, who I have tried to talk to about Nick who have just stared at me awkwardly, or dismissed the siduation. God bless you, people like you are my salvation. X
Thu, July 8th, 2010 2:40am