GROWING PAINS

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic


a satirical description of the life of a growing child

Submitted: December 22, 2017

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Submitted: December 22, 2017

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GROWING PAINS:
My son turned one a couple of sundays ago and like any other parent would be, I was happy for him, happy that he had made it this far, hitting a few milestones along the way, top of which of course is that he can walk (albeit with the raised arms and hunched shoulders). He can speak too, saying a few words but mostly uses sounds and sign language to communicate. What he is still unable to do however, is to control his bowels, so he staggers around (for lack of a better description), evoking destruction as he goes, always packaged in a diaper. Periodically his mom especially (I prefer to sort him when he hasnt gone), changes his diaper and just to introduce potty training expresses her displeasure by waving her hand next to her nose and making the "mmm mmm mmm" sound that signifies foul smell. After a while Ethy has caught on, sadly for him, the concept of discretion and unnecessary disclosure still eludes him. Even when he is on his own, when he breaks wind or some other, starts to furiously wave his little hand and make the now famous "mmm mmm mmm" mummy sound followed by peals of toothy laughter. This tickled me until last Sunday when, while chatting with his mom, I decided to catch a quick shower. As a lowered my shorts from underneath the towel, i had the "mmm mmm mmm" sound. I looked up to find the sight of a little man frantically waving his little hand by his nose......Now that's no longer funny...Am sure his little devilish mind had images of me being tossed onto a macintosh by mommy.


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