The only way

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
This story is at based on my life and experiences I've had but with a little twist.

Submitted: December 04, 2014

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Submitted: December 04, 2014

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The only way. 
It's junior year 8:56 am. I'm sitting in the right side of the room towards the back texting away. "This is the boringest fucking class" I texted my BFF Ming. She sat not even three seats away from me but if we talked in mr. Katrina's period 2 English class it was automatic detention. She texted me back almost immediately "ONLY 20 MINS LEFT????????????"  I was so excited thinking about what I was going to make in ceramics next period. The phone interrupted my train of though. Mr Katrina wobbled from his creppy corner to the phone and started talking quietly. After about a minute he said "sure I'll send her right down." Of corse every half asleep student in the room raised there head hoping to get out of class. "Jamie Camis the guidance office would like to see you" I was so excited I grabbed my bag slung it over my shoulder and scurried out. As I was re closing the door I saw all the envious zombie like teenagers staring at me. I was so happy and hopeful that I was getting transferred out of that god awful class.  I walked very slowly to guidance. It was missed match day at school for spirit week. I was wearing one boot and one high heel so I decided to take my time so I didn't faceplant. When I got there my principal mr. Bellini was sitting in this small office with this troll like lady. I noticed that the receptionist was on the phone with someone who was clearly upset. So I figured it'd be a while. I took a seat in one of those seats that you sink into so much that it's nearly impossible to get out. Once I sat I waved and flashed a quick smile to mr Bellini and troll lady. With a stern look on his face he motioned with his finger to come there. I wondered "what the fuck is this about. I'm a god damn honors student and I don't do anything wrong or illegal" what ever it was I was brave so I got up entered the tiny extremly overheated office and sat in the chair closest to the door.  Mr Bellini said "I don't beat around the bush, let's get right to it. there's rumors going around not only this school but the middle school too that your sleeping with your Spanish teacher". I was appalled. In my mind I thought "what the fuck that's ridiculous!!!" My face must of expressed that because he said "I know we didn't think so either but we have to do this little check when these things happen". I couldn't get over the way he said Spanish it was so weird. I had never even thought of mr Thompson like that. I mean he was cool but I was not tapping that. Mr. Bellini said he'd be right back he just had to talk to mr. Thompson to cross examine. I didn't really care I just didn't want to go back to class. I sat with the troll lady for a few secs in silence until she started talking " I'm mrs wills I'm the school psychologist." I politely introduced myself. We started talking about how it could be some nasty girls who started it. I didn't really care I just wanted her to know that I didn't like him. I was madly in love with seth paleman. After a few minutes of getting to know eachother mr Bellini returned with mr Thompson. We awkwardly sat next to each other while they informed us of everything that was happening. I felt bad that he had to leave his class to sit here and listen to this bullshit. I was jolted out of my thoughts of sympathy when I caught the last bit of what Bellini was saying "again, sorry for this misunderstanding we have a sub to cover your class you both should just go home and get a early start in the weekend" I thought " what the hell it's only Thursday" either way I wasn't gonna question time off from this hell hole. I smiled nodded and I was on my way. As I left the office to go get my jacket and books I noticed that it was pouring "that's just lovely" I thought.  I grabbed my stuff shoved it into my very messy bag and headed towards the parking lot where my raggedy old car was parked. I ran through the monsoon and quickly got in my car. I put my stuff in the back seat and checked my phone. "What the fuck that took an hour and 45 minutes" Jesus Christ. I was starving so I put the key in the ignition planning in heading for subway. I turned the key once, twice, then three times but the engine just wouldn't turn over. "Fuck this is just great" I yelled into the steering wheel I look my shoes off and got out of the car to try and fix it. I checked the basics and couldn't figure it out. That's when mr. Thompson came out of the back school door. "Need some help there?" He yelled over the rain. "Could you that'd be wonderful" I answered back trying not to make conversation rude or awkward between us considering what just happened. He looked for a few mins. I decided to break the silence saying "you look like you know what your doing". "Really?" He replied. "Not in the least" I said. "I suppose you know it all miss smarty pants" "well for one thing I know that it'll start with out power steering fluid and that's the chamber where your looking right now." I said all cocky. "Ow that hurt" he said grabbing his chest "that went right to the heart". I chuckled a little he was kinda amazing. "Hi I'm Ryan." He said. The question pondered my mind of wither not I should shake it or call him ryan considering the shit that just went down. I did it anyway. "Well Ryan I'm Jamie but you already knew that. Would you mind bringing your car over here and giving me a little jump start?" " it'd be my pleasure" he said with a little grin as he turned and ran for his car to get shelter from the rain. As he turned I thought 3 things 1) he's got a NICE ass
2)is he fucking flirting with me???
3) why do I like it?!?! 
I pushed the questions aside for the moment and went to get my jumper cables out of my trunk. "Shit I took them out last night after practice, I'm a dumbass" I said. He pulled up and jumped out of his red jeep. Shyly I asked "do you happen to have jumper cables???" He said "no... I though you would." "Damn it I did yesterday but I took them out. This is just a great day." I yelled turning in a circle seemingly shouting at the air at this point. "I'm sorry want to go get some lunch and we can pick them up and I'll bring you back here?" He asked me trying to calm me down. "Yeah I think something in my stomach and and a clear mind would be best right now," I replied as I climbed into his car. He asked where I wanted to go and my prior craving for a subway salad changed and to a big ass juicy burger. "Let's go to five guys" I said sounding like a five year old about to go to a toy store. "I was thinking the same thing" he started the car and we were on our way. I was so deep In thought. "Most of this year he's just been another teacher trying to act "chill". I never thought anything of him, I never really talked to him other than what was needed. Now we both got interrogated this morning to see if we were sleeping together and somehow I ended up going out with him for lunch not even fifteen minutes after we were released from the guidence office. How is that possible?!?!" I took myself away from my roaming mind by turning on the radio. Micheal bubles save the last dance for me came on. "I love this song" I thought to myself. " you can change it if you don't like it" I said out loud to try to accommodate him. " Actually I really like this song." He said shyly. "Omfg me too!" I yelled out in excitement. He turned it up and we sang together. Once we got the the resturaunt he held the door for me and we sat down and ate together. We talked about life we had never really gotten to know eachother on a personal level before but now I knew so much about him. In this short time it seemed to be like we knew eachother for for ever. We got back in the car and he asked "where to?" He had this amazing smile that I had never really noticed before. I smiled and gave him my address. "Why are you so smiley" he asked jokingly. "I don't know it  can't because I'm here with you because this has gotta be the worst part of my week." I said jokingly adding a smile in there so even at his old age he could identify that I was joking. "Man you really like to pick on me. You know when girls do that it means they like the person" he said In a condescending tone. "Ugh I do not!" I yelled as I turned the music on. He chuckled like a five year old and it was so adorable. When we got to my house I made him promise that he'd  wait right there. He said  that he wouldn't leave even if he found out he had won the lottery. I ran inside to change and get my jumper cables.  I couldn't believe I actually was enjoying his corny attempts of flirting with me. And I couldn't believe I was flirting back. I quickly threw on a dress and ran back outside. He was waiting there listening to the radio. "Onwards and outwards" I exclaimed. "Wow you look beautiful!" He said practically drooling. I blushed "thanks now let's go before school gets out and then I'll never get home" once we got my car up in running he said "I had a lot of fun today Jamie, if you need anything at all give me a call." He took a red pen that he always used and wrote his number on my hand. I started driving home and when I got to the light I started thinking I'm usually the girl that can't stop trying to please seth and I don't think I want to do that anymore. I had a choice stay with the man who just made me feel like a princess in and hour or my first love that I'd been with for years. The red light turned to green and the cars honked behind me I had to make my decision right then and there left to go to Seth's or right to go home and put this all behind me. I took a left and headed for Seth's. He was being homeschooled at the moment because he couldn't work and go to school at the same time. When I got there I walked in and immeadiatily he was all over me yelling at me and he slapped me for being there so early with out notice. I said " FUCK YOU. I met a man today who cared for me. Treated me amazingly and would rather shoot himself than ever lay a hand on a woman. I don't know who you think you are going around and laying your hands on the girl that has been nothing but good to you for 2 years but that's not the man I want to spend my time with were fucking over I grabbed my keys and ran out I drove over to Mings and walked in like usual and sat down and just bawled I had lost it. I just said good bye to the two best years of my life she comforted me for hours and then I decided I just needed to go home and get some sleep. When I walked into the house my mother was there furious. I asked her what was wrong. She was Never home this early. She said" where the hell have you been. I got to he call from your principal saying. You have the next few days as vacation. How did you do that and who the fuck is this teacher that I heard you were sleeping with?!?!" In an attempt to calm her down I tried to explain everything mr Bellini had told me. She was still angry at me so I went running up the stairs to my bedroom. "How could she be mad at me I didn't do anything?!?!" I thought to myself as I threw my body down on my bed. I cried for hours this really has been a terrible day. I really needed to talk to someone and Ming was out with her boyfriend Matt. So I looked at the half faded phone number on my hand and called. I let it ring a few times "hello?" A heard a voice in the other side if the line. It was the sweetest most comforting voice I have heard in the last few hours. "Ryan?" I asked all choked up. "Jamie? What's the matter are you ok?" He asked clearly sensing that I was upset. "Not everything's not okay I really need someone to talk to." I managed to blurt out between sobs. "I'll be there in ten minutes." He said quickly. "I can't come out my moms furious with me" I told him as I began to sob again. "I'll find a way to get to you." He hung up the phone. "He really is my superman. He keeps coming to my rescue and clearing the fog from my eyes." I was so sad but I tried to stop crying at least just so I could see him. I was grabbing a tissue and wiping my eyes dry when all of a sudden I heard a "bang" against my window I opened it and looked out. There he was so adorable "I decided to go all old school Romeo with it" he was the best thing that's happened all week. He claimed the emergancy fire ladder my dad had for me in the back of my house and we sat in the roof for hours at first it was just me sobbing about what an abusive ass hole of a boy friend he was and then how awesome he was at the same time. Finally after both of us getting everything off our chests about everything from relationships to little white lies we told our parents when we were little, silence fell over us it was just him and me in my roof watching the moon and stars travel the sky. When I was cold he gave me his jacket. I grabbed his hand put it around my shoulders and I just cuddled into his chest and made him promise that no matter what happens he'll never forget how to be a gentleman like he was that night. When it started to get light out we decided it was time to part ways. I kept his jacket in hopes that this would happen again. I went to bed that night smiling for the first time in months. Te next morning I texted him asking him to come over and just spend some time with me since neither of us had to return to school that day. When he got there he gave me a bouquet of lilies. "You remembered that they were my favorite flower" I said very touched. "How could I forget they were my mothers favorite too." He said. ""Were"?" I asked. "Just like you don't wanna talk about your family I don't want to talk about mine either." He said distantly. "I respect that" is what I said but I wanted to yell " I'm inly doing this because I obviously care for you and if you knew about my past it'd hurt you". He just kissed my forehead and made me a wonderful breakfast. After breakfast we went for a walk together and ended up on a park bench together by a pond about a mile from my house. We sat there watching the ducks swim the morning sun sending a shimmer over their already wet wings. Getting back to reality I asked "this is it isn't it?" Confused he asked "what do you mean?" I answered "this whole thing, us, it's over now right. How could we stay together when these accusations were already made against us. How could we be happy when if the school or my parents found out you'd be in jail. This can't last it's just impossible." Obviously he hadn't thought about it because it took him quite a few minutes to come up with a response. "It's true it'll be hard but I don't want it to end. I really like you. Your an amazing girl you have so much to offer the world and frankly I can see my self getting married to you in a few years. It's going to be hard and were going to have to lie but we'll be ok as long as we try." I kissed him and it felt so right. "Let's go back to my house I have something I want to show you" we practically sprinted back to my house, when we got there I sat him down in the living room and I ran up stairs is came down stairs with a little box. "What is this?" He asked looking at the box that was now in his lap. "Well open it and find out dummy" I said with a smirk nudging him in the side. When he opened the box he saw about a hundred peices of scrap paper. He read each one aloud "38) go sky diving 80)get engaged 94) be loved" he read about fifteen of then and then asked me a second time what the papers are. " they're my bucket list." I replied hoping to clear things up "you what list???" He asked. "My bucket list, the things I want to accomplish before I die. It's like this thing where if you do everything on your list you've had the best life you could have possibly had." I explained to him. He was so amused he kept going through paper after paper. "Can I dump these out" he asked "sure as long as I'm not the one who has to clean it up" I replied with a smirk he dumped them out an started ordering then by number after about ten minutes he asked where sloth of the numbers went I told him those were things I already did. "What do you do with a paper once you've done it?" I make little origami boats and release them into the ocean. I told him. "Has anyone ever seen these before?" He asked me clearly blown away by the whole concept. "Nope your the first one" I said truthfully. We cleaned them up all except one he said "were going to do this one today." I read it "72) paint a picture on a wall". We'll mister how are we going to get a wall that my mother won't kill me for painting in..? I asked him in a cocky tone. "I have at least 7 that you can pick from at my house?" "Then let's go!" I exclaimed excitedly. We climbed in that red jeep and we went to homedepot picked out at least 15 different paint colors and bought them all. We went to his house and I just had a feild day with it. I made him stay in his room till it was finished because I didn't want the suprise to be ruined. It took me only a few hours and I was ready to unveil my masterpiece. I hung a white sheet over it and called him out. It was a 10ft wide and 6ft tall mural. When he was ready he pulled the sheet off and was blown away by the result it was a picture if the beach and the ocean and setting sail just before a wave was an origami boat with the writing 72) paint a picture on a wall. He was so happy with it he kept saying "it beautiful, it's amazing, your beautiful, your amazing". I could help but think about how much happier I was not then I had ever been before. After cleaning up our mess we drove the the beach where I showed him how to make and origami boat and we set it in the water together and watched it said away. He brought me home and we kissed goodnight. As I left the car I stopped turn around and went back. I opened the door and said I know we kinda just started hanging out but I..." I was suddenly cut off "love you" he said finishing my sentence. " yea I love you too" he kissed me again and I walked back to my house with the biggest grin on my face. On Monday morning I was walking to my locker and I got called down to mr bellinis office over the loudspeaker. "Oh shit did somebody see us over the last few days?!"I thought. I brushed it off and went down to the office. When I walked in Ryan and mr Bellini were sitting there. Bellini looked up as I shut the door and with a warm smile he welcomed me in to his office. "How was your long weekend?" He asked me. "It was pretty peaceful I got some house work done thanks for asking." I replied trying not to let him know that I was with Ryan all weekend. Bellini started talking agian in his loud booming military voice that we were all used to an afraid of " just to make the rumor go to rest were changed your schedule Jamie your in almost all of your same classes except we switched your English and Spanish period. For your Spanish class since there are no other teachers that teach that level class we ask you that you just report to the library or cafè for study hall." "YES I WAS OUT IF MR KATRINAS CLASS!!!!" I though to my self. Bellinis voice interrupted my thought process again "we also ask that just for the students safety of mind that you too don't interact or really just go near each other." I was slightly taken back "how are we going to be together when I'm not aloud to talk or go near him?!?!" I though freaking out. "Thank you very much mr Bellini" Ryan and I said almost simultaneously. We left the office he held the door for me and we exchanged a quick glance. Those soft hazel eyes will be the death of me they were so gorgeous. I went to the right and up the stairs and he went to the left back to his class room. I quickly went to the ladies room found the furthest stall that was open and quietly sobbed. I rummaged through my purse for my phone. Once I got it out it took me 4 tries to unlock it because my hands were skating so badly. Once it was open I texted ryan. "Hon, I don't know how I can do this I can't keep secretes and lie to everyone" I put my phone back on my lap ran my fingers through my long dark brown wavy hair and cried ever harder because nothing was going my way and now I had to try to get rid of these puffy eyes and go to a brand new class 3/4 of the way through the year!!!! "We can do this we need to be strong. Don't let ANYONE in this school talk down to you. Your better now with all your imperfections then they can ever be in their entire lives. I love you and you love me that's all that matters. We don't need approval from anyone but our hearts. Believe me I wish I could swoop into you class declare my love for you and storm out of this school and quit. But we can't we can be the best couple ever out of school but here were going to act as if were enemy's. Ik we've only been together for 4 days but I'm 36 and I've had over 15 serious relationships and this one feels truer than any if them. I love you Jamie rose Canis. " I read Ryan's text under my breath "were a couple???" I answered back immeadiatily he answered back "of corse????" I couldn't help but grin and as if everything was going to be okay. "I love you Ryan you haven't told me your middle name Thompson " I  grabbed my phone and walk out the mirror and touched up my eyes with some make up to make them less red and headed back I class. As I entered my new class I could feel the looks and the I Gould hear the gasps and whispers but is held my head high and went about my day. Once I got settled my phone buzzed it was a new text from Ryan. "it's Leslie" it said. "I love it ????" I replied and shut my phone off in ten minutes I went from not wanting to leave a bathroom stall because of fear to not being able to wait to take on all of the talking and rumors head on. I loved him so much.  "He really is my superman." I said t myself. When lunch time came I say with my usual group of friends. As soon as I sat down I was swarmed with questions about what has happened. I simply stuck with the story I was telling everyone "we are not were not and never will be a thing my neighbor Rebecca made up the rumor. She's and attention hog and just needed something to make her friends. Sadly I was just the other end of that attack." Everyone seemed to buy it. More importantly Ryan and I were in the clear. Ryan texted me with directions of where to walk to after school so he'd pick me up and we'd go hang out. I walked up king street on 4 houses in on hillside. I waited five minutes and sure enough I saw the red jeep turn the corner to pick me up. We did this every day wither it was to go to his house to cuddle and watch a movie or complete things on my bucket list. Months passed of pure bliss and happy ness together and spring turned to summer. I had successfully completed my third year of high school and now with students and staff not around it was a lot easier to have. Relation ship. I told my mother that I was spending a few weeks with Ming and she was fine with it. She got the house to herself so neither of us really asked any questions about what we planned in doing. Ming was the best cover for me. She's lie to my mom constantly just to cover my ass. She truley was the best of wing women. We wanted to further or relation ship we didn't want to rush into sex but we wanted to do something drastic together (besides living together which we already pretty much were it at least I thought so. I set that bucket list item off I to the water anyway). We decided to visit his house in the Dominican Republic for 3 days just the two of us alone together with no worries in the world was purely amazing. Whilst cuddled up on the beach we'd just talk "how was your father killed?" He asked me one day. "We'll he was driving my brother to his baseball game when he was four and they hit a truck driver who was inebriated and in the wrong lane. My brother was pronounced dead upon arrival but my father made it alive to the hospital but died during surgery complications" I explained to him how after that had happened my life went down hill and my mother spun out of control. "Because of the loss of their lives that's when I decided to make a bucket list so I could live out my life to the fullest extent because they were never given that chance. You've actually given me the chance to do 60 bucket list items in the last 3 months. And I thank you for that I only have about 30 left to do". His kiss to me was reassuring. "What was your mother like?" I'm not sure when I was three she hopped in aplane to go visit my aunt in Venice and she never returned the plane went down and she was one of the few that was declared missing" my eyes were bugged out of my head and my jaw dropped "I'm so sorry Ry I had no idea" it okay honey if love you and I'm will to share everything with you especially my life and my past. I felt like he knew that I was keeping something from him but I didn't feel like I could tell him. It didn't matter anyway because rid he had found out that I was hiding something he'd love me either way. But at the time I didn't see it that way. Our vacation flew by in no time but that didn't stop us from still being in paradise when we came back we spent so much time together and unlike most couples we didn't get cranky or bored with eachother we actually got closer and closer as the days wore on. At night after I'd take my shower he'd brush and braid my hair. When my nails chipped he's fix them up he cook almost every meal for me and when he didn't he'd take me out and treat me like a princess. I loved him more than life it's self. We lived in the north east and by the time September can around and school started we got this chain of freak weather. One day it was like 90 degrees. The next it was 40 we had hurricane and tornados. When October rolled around we got this heavy snow fall everyday durring school. That didn't stop us though everyday he'd pick me up or I'd drive over depending on wither for not I wanted to stay the night. On October 15th 2014 I left school at 2:17 pm and headed north up Nichols ave towards his house. The road was slippery but I was a pretty good driver my only issues was, that the snow was coming down so heavily that I couldn't see 12 feet I front of me but I was going slowly and being cautions. As I turned on the parkway all I recall was my tires spinning out from under neath. The police officers tell me that I hit a patch of black ice and went trough the barrier and hit a freighter head on. It's a mirical I'm still alive. I'm sitting in the hospital writing this to you Ryan. I'm telling you this story because I know I can't go on. I'm not going to live through this because that thing that I've been hiding from you is that when my father made it out alive I tried to do everything I could to save him. He needed lots of different tissues and organs I gave him one of my kidneys and a lot of tisses. That's the main reason I didn't want to have sex with you because I'm ashamed of my scars. The reason I won't make it out of this accident is because my only kidney is now failing. I've asked the doctors not to tell you what's happening to me because ik if they do you'll try to save me and if you do that you'll die because I've also found out very recently the name of the other kidney donor that gave to my father his name is Ryan Leslie Thompson. If you try to save me you'll die and I don't think I could live with such a huge debt to repay. The only thing I ask is that you don't ever forget me and you don't ever forget how to be a gentle man like you were on our first date. You are my superman. But I'm sad to say this is the only way. I love you Ryan Leslie Thompson. I love you more than the earth and stars combined. Don't let anyone tell you you don't matter your beautiful and your amazing but this is goodbye.
Love, 
Jamie Rose Camis


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