Is anybody listening?
Can you hear me trying to think out loud
Above the dull roar of the crowded hallway?
I'm desperately trying to win your attention
In order to tell you about my story-
The difficult story with a bad ending.
Please, friend, won't you take a moment to
I just need someone to talk to,
To tell me it's going to be okay;
That I won't wake up with nightmares again,
Not like the one last night.
I need someone to rationalize this fear
And dissipate this anxiety
Of things that haunt me in the night.
If you won't listen, maybe someone else will,
Maybe someone like
Mary Jane or Jack Daniels.
Because your ear is about as deaf
As this shot glass I'm holding
And your heart is about as warm
As this joint my fingers house.
Maybe I'll find a guy to lay with in bed
And we can stay up all night
Swapping stories of brokenness
And shattered childhoods.
We'll agree with each other that
There are no more sunrays
Or PB&J's, or other innocent mementos.
All that's left are empty bottles,
Soiled sheets, and a tab run-up with a drug dealer.
Don't think these consequences of mine
Fall solely on my shoulders
Because somewhere in the past
I tried to tell you
And it wasn't my fault you didn't listen.
So don't shake your head at the things I do
And you know that I hear you whispering,
"She used to be so much better,
She really went downhill."
I blame the story that resides in me
Because someone like you
Wouldn't let it out.
Although there's no one to blame but myself
For the handful of pills
Being washed down my throat by Jack.
© Copyright 2016 Kathryn. All rights reserved.