how they feel

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic

this is what really happens and you realize how the other person must be really feeling.you know the feeling because you have gone through it all but you cannot do anything to help.actually its all about a young boy gointhrough various things in life.

 

Chapter1.

Kevin looked at his other classmates and how they were tormenting the girl who sat just right in front of him .He always felt really sorry for the girl but what else could he do if feeling sorry could not help? well he just let them go on and occassionally smiled when a classmate said something funny but could not bring himself to laugh. why could other people be so mean? why should somebody just decide to attack you or do something wrong to you even when you didn't do nothing to them?

What about all the talks about bullying going on what about all the pamphlets that he always saw outside the offices with big and bold letters saying lets stop bullying? were the people really working against bullying or were they just there to be seen. he recalled during gym class where Mary, this girl who is plump was sitting down and well, he could recall as one of the boys who sat next to him  saying "yo ,see that ?he looked at where he had been pointing and he turned around quickly. they had been looking at this girls butt line which had been showing and they were laughing their heads off but no one had the courage to be a woman enough just to tell her that she should pull up her pants up a little bit. he could see the girl searching frantically at what was happening and  could really feel the girls thoughts asking herself why all the people turned in her direction and started laughing at her .he could feel the pain ,the anger that was swelling up in the girl but knew that she couldn’t do nothing.

he recalled how he had been feeling angry when he first came to this school and everybody was laughing at him but he didn’t know what they had been laughing at until recently when he had been in an argument and one person had commented on how his hairline was all the way to the back and how everybody had burst off laughing their heads off.

Well .in his life though how short he had lived he had come to meet people of different characters and he had gone through various life changes and had experienced different kinds of lifestyles and by Gods grace he had managed to survive all that and now he was determined as ever to achieve what he had  come looking for in this school no matter what it took he would take all his time just to achieve his dreams .he had big goals he saw himself as the most achieved man ever and he had the believe that all those people that were high up there were not all born with a silver spoon in their mouth neither were they born with a golden one so that why he really didn’t want to interfere with the other kids just to get himself all messed up .he had little interaction with the  other kids because he did not want to come,  to school each morning smelling like a skunk just coz of that weed that he head been smoking .no! that was someone else's life not his he had bigger ambition .his mind was brought back to the present by this girl who was whispering near him" damn, this girl really stinks yo. "he looked at where she was pointing to with her head and was surprised to see Mary seated next to her .he unconsciously nodded his head and just realized too late what he had done .there would be no taking back what he had just done .Mary had seen him nod and she looked at him as if she was going to cry.

Kevin may not have been  among the cute guys or even nearer to that group but really he had a lot of influence on the girls that he associated with .he smiled faintly as he thought of how so many girls he had come to associate with had been friends with him for a long time and he had not had any troubles with any of them until that day when he stops replying to texts and he goes quiet and everybody just gets tired of not getting replies and they all quit .for instance he had this influence on some girl and she had gone ahead to tell him more about her family that he really needed to know and during valentine when she had asked him if they could go out he had said he had not really been interested in her she had become so furious but had controlled herself and said "we can go out as friends and not on a date dumb ass "she had eventually said but he could sense the hurt in her voice, he could read the sound of betrayal just bas he had been done to when he had asked girls out and they had said they were all not interested in him but how he talked to them and that had been all. and he had vowed to repay every girl in the same way.

his worst time was when he had to switch seats .He hated having to move from one place to another but what could he do? if the teachers had decided, then he could not bring himself to start arguing with them .what use would it have? you would end up getting kicked out of the classroom and have security following you all the way to the main office and have all the teachers and students attention on you .one thing he hated most was having a lot of people pay their useless and annoying attention to you .when would people ever learn to pay their attention to themselves? why wouldn’t everyone learn to mind their own business?

that day he went home feeling angry at himself and at all the other people. why could sometimes people just be so unfair like if the teacher really knew that he could not sit with this self proclaimed beautiful girl in class and yet he had been so mean to put her to sit right next to her with another boy whom he so much as liked least of all among his friends .what could they say to each other? they really had nothing in common to discuss. the world is so sad .he wished he had not been born under the circumstances he had .why couldn’t he have been born white? or if god had decided to be so unfair he could have been born at least dark skin, not an ugly looking thing he was .no girl could have ever liked him leave alone loving him. sometimes he often wondered how he had even managed to love himself.

he didn’t realize he was home till he saw his father car in the parking lot .he felt like just killing himself but he laughed to himself as he thought of himself just dead ,rotting and forgotten by all his friends while they were having fun and he was in some dark hole like he never had existed, well ,to him all those that killed themselves were all stupid .he was stupid too but not to that extreme.

he absent mindedly took  the single key from his pocket and looked at the army strap where it hung. someday he hoped to join the army and be among those that went into war and on missions just eliminating the bad guys .if you decide to eliminate all the bad guys then how would the world be? he was asking himself and he laughed out loud as he realized that without the bad guys nobody would survive this boring world see without the bad guys everything will be affected from economy even to the single cow living alone in the countryside so everything had a purpose in life and without it we all cant stand the craziness of the world itself

the next day was saturday and kevin always loved  going to church on saturdays because he had the sense that though he qas not feeling like he believed so much at least he thought he felt better when he went to church and most especially a seventh day adventist church.he had been born in a sda church and had been goin to that church as long as he could remember.

while in kenya he had attended a koelel highschoolbut like in that school he had fallen back in church because he had been good at attending the church but their were vtwo problems,one was that he had been a fresh man and fresh mans and sophomores all had entertainment after lunch and he could not afford to miss the entertainment.,the other problem was that he had come to develop the habit of laziness in the past few days and he knew that the only time he had to clean up and if he missed he could not do it at any given time.

he smiled as he rememberred how hard life had been in koelelhighschool and how he had come to enjoy the life which the school offered like when he had come to the school he had promised his parents tryhat he would work hard and be a good boy.they trusted him and atleast they all duid coz he had worked hard to earn the position in that school he could still recall how his uncle had enthuastically said"as far as i can remember this is the only person i know who has not given me any trouble having to find a school foir him coz he has workeed hard and earned the school.all the others ave been going to schools trying to find some space in that school for themn to be accepted."

life in koelel highschool had been fun but when you lived in the school you could always have the idea that it was like being in a  prison. it was located in an army camp where you were surrounded by armed men 24/7.the other side where there was no army fence there was a very steep cliff and you could look across and see some very dry land strecting for a long way.

being a fresh man had been a hard job for example when kevin had been given his long sleeved shirt which he supposed would be worn only during visitings,funkiesand closings.he can recall that he had put he shirtt on top of his bed cover for maybe 1 min when he had gone out to pick his clothes from his clothes line and he had come back only to find that his shirt was missing from where he had placed it.

he tried looking for it but in vain.hje could not see it anywhere. he waited till the next day where he had just gone outside to pick the shirt from a clothews line and he knew it would cost him something tjhough he had not really realized that at the time when he was picki8ng it from thew clothes line.he had gone aheads and arranged it in the box where he kept his clothes only to fit himself later and found out that the shirt was a perfect size for him.

that seems like an easy job to do but when you are taking it from the clothes line it doesnt feel that easy like when his school coat had been taken and he ad to wake up early in the morning feelingb the cold going deep down to his bones.the skin could not protect him neither could the classroom where he went half the glasses had been broken from a strike whichbthey had done"i mean the other students."they had thrown rocks and stuffd and had broken nearly all the windows.men when he remembers the time he still shivers.

There had been that day when the morning had just started out as normal as any cold morning could be expected to start and since he was feeling the cold that bore into the bones he took out one sweater from his box and put it under his own sweater so that nobody could see the admission number which was on it .he had gone to class and they had all been released to go to the dorm meeting which happened every Wednesday and it was all about being clean in school and in the dorm and doing all the necessary things you can do to survive in a country and school where its not soo much developed and by saying developed it brought something else to Kevin's mind as he heard himself saying the word.it tasted disgusting. He could remember that when he had first told the other students in his class that he had come out of Africa and how everybody had laughed off asking how come he could speak English soo fluently though he had a heavy acc3nt but everybody could understand what he said.that had made him feel soo mad that he could have torn them to pieces like a hungry lion if he had been given the opportunity to.

How do you really feel like when somebody makes fun of where you come from??

That's a question that he kept on asking himself the whole day.

He had the answeryes yes but what do other people feel like when they are being made fun of just because they come from a different place?

He knew that he felt pain ,discriminated and hurt but what do u really do if you are in a situation like that??

Those are some of the questions that flocked his mind and some had answers while some did not have them.

That was what he had been thinking about till he had gone to sleep.

Kevin woke up early the next day or so he thought.he really wanted to study and be something in life enjoying the nice fruits that life offered but one question he always asked himself was like the rich guys or the ones who thought they were soo rich why then did they still have problems?

He had never heard of any person that did not have problems in his life 

The rich were always afraid that they may be attacked otr kidnapped or killed and their money and riches stolen.

The poor guys were always in need of food and stuff like that even the rich understand what the poor guys need.the middle class guys need even more but their problem is greed only they are not afraid of people attacking them or killing them or their missing food or something they are just greedy for more.what do the rich feel like when somebody what's to assassinate them ??

What do the poor feel like when hey miss meals??

What do the middle class feel like when they want more??

What do people feel like??

How do they feel???

He wished somebody could come out of somewhere and answer his questions but he knew that that was what they all asked themselves everyday of life.why is life so questionable?

He took a shower and left for school.he was used to walking on the way to school.actually he hated taking a bus to school and he had vowed never to take one unless it's a school bus and it would certainly not be to school in the morning.

He was in for a disappointment when he went to his homeroom class only to settle down before he heard people saying that it smelled like onions.everyone knew when something like that was ever said they would turn to face the new guy in class.

They had started saying that since the first day he had come in bunobody had really said anything to him except that day when he had been coming out of the class and this crazy girl Jane had said,

"Hey, if I may ask are you Muslim?"

"Yes why?" He had asked.

"Yes.I knew it that's why you never use yourdeodorant!I heard that it's against Muslims to use that kinda of stuff.is it true?"

Kevin had felt very annoyed at that point where he couldn't take it anymore.

Why do people gave to be soo  unthinking?

Are they illiterate or something?

What does a deodorants have to do with Muslims??

"No am not Muslim actually and for your own information Muslims use deodorant too or something and they don't stink!and you know nothing about it!

So shut the fuck up and don't say nine more." He had said

Kevin had felt very happy.atleast there was somebody who was not willing to keep up with nonsense.somebody who knew something.maybe he would have some ans2ers on Kevin's questions too .

He would be friends with him!!!

That day he made sure to sit next to the new boy whim he learnt that his name was Brian and that he was from Africa and that he would not keep up with people who were not willing to learn.

"So Brian I have alot of questions which am not sure you can answer but can I just ask?

" OK just go ahead ahead my boy."

"So how do they feel??"

Who?

The people who get all this stuff done to them?

Well am gonna tell you.firt they all feel very annoyed because other people just can't let them be.

Second they pity themselves because they wish they could have been born in another person's place .

Third they feel very ashamed because they think they are not living a normal life but in reality they are .everybody is normal in their own way.

Even if they had been born under different circumstances they could still be feeling not normal and they would still wish to be somewhere else.that's how they feel

That's what I feel

That's what I feel 

AND THATS HOW THEY FEEL!!!

 


Submitted: March 03, 2016

© Copyright 2022 kevinwhiteyoung. All rights reserved.

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Comments

Zeej Hawkins

That is an amazing peice. You have talent! And a good mind!

Thu, March 3rd, 2016 3:51pm

Author
Reply

thanks soo much

Thu, March 3rd, 2016 1:00pm

Solembumsyrup

Well written with an nice and easy character. I would advise you polish up your punctuation and spelling a little bit to make it easier to read but other than that perfectly fine. Looking forward to seeing more.

Fri, March 4th, 2016 9:14pm

Author
Reply

thank you very much and i am gonna work on that.thanks

Fri, March 4th, 2016 7:44pm

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