the enchanted lake

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Horror  |  House: Booksie Classic
Its not finished, just a piece of writing that i found myself typing away.
I had first intended to make it a dream, but my imagination got the best of me and it turned into a horror :)

Im looking for honest reviews of my work, what i could improve and what you like/dont like about it.
remember though, its not finished :)

Submitted: January 23, 2011

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Submitted: January 23, 2011

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The enchanted lake. The air around me with heavy, making my breath shallow and the darkness of the night was suffocating me, restricting my vision. The woods were intimidating, the shadows created by the moonlight struggling to shine through the tree tops were reaching out and swirling like smoke around the trunks of the trees. The distant calls of nocturnal creatures of the night echoed around me, and the rustling of every tree and brush made me cautious and just that little bit more agitated. The moon was a full, providing me with only light source I had, and it mercifully shone down on me, guiding me forward. As the cold wind nipped at my exposed feet, and the long grass stroked my bare legs, I continued to walk with no real sense of direction. It wasn’t until it had felt that I had been walking for hours did I spot a glinting flashing of light in the distance. As I grew closer, I could see that the flashing light that I thought I had seen was in fact the moonlight dancing off of the surface of water, the light reflecting brightly back at me. The lake was surrounded by trees and fully bloomed flowers that looked deep shades of blue and soiled red in the dim light of the moon. There was a thick fog that hovered above the waters surface, floating like clouds towards me. I stood there, compelled by the beauty and was only slightly aware of the wind singing to me, the water calling me. It wasn’t long before I realised I wasn’t alone. To my right I witnessed the leaves on a bush separating and a long defined paw reached out followed by a sleek silver body of a wolf. I was immediately drawn to the wolf’s eyes, the intense bright blue shone like a light of its own, staring not at me, but through me as if seeing into my soul. I felt no immediate sense of danger, but a small curiosity growing from inside me as I watched the wolf trot up towards me, his eyes never leaving mine, and continued all the way to lakes edge where he drank steadily; his pink tongue lapping up the water. I watched intensely as I noticed a glow, that started at his furry snout and spread through his whole body. It was almost as If the water was filling him with energy and strength and it memorised me into a trance. He then lifted his head, and took one last look at me before trotting back into the bush from which he came. Following the wolfs actions I drifted towards the lake, and knelt down, my hand poised to cup a handful of water. Staring at the swirling mass of water I watched as scarlet droplets began to rise to the surface, the colour diffusing and sinking into the blue. I narrowed my eyes, straining to see in the dim light. I bent my back, my face growing closer to the water, so close that the tip of my nose was an inch from the surface. Two more scarlet droplets began to rise to the surface, but instead of spreading out, the colours became clearer and clearer, sharpening. My forehead creased in confusion and realisation hit me like a punch to the stomach. I tried to turn, to scream, panic choking me, fear paralyzing my body. I couldn’t move fast enough, to react. The gnarled hand reached out from beneath the waves, my eyes widening in shock, a scream caught in my throat. A face followed the hand, the creature jumping out to pull me in. it had drooping skin, the colour of green fungus and bright burning eyes that stared angrily at my own. The hands clutched at my hair, viciously ripping me down roughly into the water, the coldness engulfing me completely.


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