The Blog

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Religion and Spirituality  |  House: Booksie Classic
Reesa is a depressed teenager that writes about her problems on her blog. She does not expect her blog to become a huge success though. Reesa's blog is very popular and is even featured on the world news. But after Reesa writes about the meaning of life, her fans realize that she is going to commit suicide. Reesa lands in the psychiatric hospital to deal with her problems and learn the real meaning of life: Jesus.

Submitted: September 24, 2014

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Submitted: September 24, 2014

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Chapter 1

 

My alarm clock was going off. I wasn’t ready to get up. Getting up meant dealing with the world. Staying in bed meant avoiding reality and living in my dreams.

I reluctantly rolled out of bed. I threw on a pair of pants. I grabbed a sweatshirt even though it was kind of warm and headed out the door after grabbing a couple toaster pastries. I was starving.

Once I arrived at school, I dumped my unfinished homework into my locker and headed to English class.

Mrs. Ryan began rambling on about symbolism in the novel we were reading. I hadn’t been able to focus on the reading last night. I also wasn’t focused on what Mrs. Ryan was saying either. I wasn’t focused much at all in life anymore.

Really, life was pretty meaningless. I was pretty tired of dealing with the constant overwhelming sadness that seemed to plague my life lately.

The bell rang and I went to history. I knew it was going to be very similar to English. I hadn’t finished my assignment and I knew I would struggle to concentrate.

I was relieved when it was finally lunch. I went to the cafeteria and got my lunch tray before sitting down at my usual table by myself.

I used to have friends. That was before I became withdrawn. That was before I was no longer interested in hanging out with them and doing the activities that friends enjoy.

Suddenly, a brilliant idea came to mind. Maybe I could write about my feelings. I could write a blog and then hopefully, all of America could understand what I was going through just by reading my blog.

The bell rang just as I finished eating my lunch. It was time for an afternoon of the same thing I had endured this morning.

 

Chapter 2

 

“How was school today, Reesa?” my mom asked as I came into the kitchen.

“Fine,” I lied.

“Do you have a lot of homework?”

“Not really,” I lied again. I really had no motivation to do my homework again today. I probably wouldn’t be able to concentrate on it anyway.

I went up to my room and pulled out my laptop. I Googled blogs and several sites popped up. I clicked on the first one and then started creating an account.

What should I title my blog though? I asked myself when I came to that part.

I didn’t want anyone to know my identity through my blog. I still wanted to be able to share my life with people though.

“The Thoughts and Feelings of a High School Student,” I finally decided. I made my username RR for my name, Reesa Rathburn.

With the account created, I started working on my profile.

 

 

 

 

Biography

 

I am a junior in high school suffering from depression. Right now, it pretty much controls my life so there really isn’t much left to say about my life.

 

With my biography finished, I wrote my first post.

 

Depression

 

Last summer, I would wake up everyday and then just stare out the window. I knew I was wasting my summer but I just didn’t have the energy to do anything else. Something was wrong, but I just couldn’t figure out what it was. One day however, it hit me out of nowhere. I had depression. I didn’t know a lot about depression other than sadness and suicide. Some research told me more about what was going on it my brain.

 

Depression affects my entire day. I sleep really late. I like it when I sleep because than I don’t have to deal with the world around me. Instead, I get to live in my dreams.

 

Once I finally get up, I will eat a large breakfast. Food is one of the few things I can count on. Food gives me comfort and helps me feel better.

 

After breakfast, I leave for school. School is nearly impossible because I would rather be alone. I also can’t concentrate on my schoolwork. I feel like school is a waste of time since I will never amount to anything. My future is hopeless. Life is pointless.

 

After school, I come home and stare out the window until it is time to go to bed. Most nights, this is pretty early.

 

Besides all that, I also feel this overwhelming sadness all the time. It is hard to think about anything else.

 

This is just a brief overview of depression in my life. Like I said, depression pretty much controls my entire day.

 

With the post written, I quickly added some tags and then posted it. After that, I logged out and lay down on my bed.

“Are you feeling all right, Reesa?” my mom asked later when she came into my room later.

“I am just tired,” I said. “I didn’t sleep very good last night.”

“Are you ready for dinner?”

“Sure.” Dinner is one thing I can do.

I joined my dad and sister Leigh at the table. We started passing around the food and I took large servings of everything.

“Are you really hungry again tonight, Reesa?” my dad asked. “You sure have been eating a lot lately.”

“School lunch is disgusting,” I replied. School lunch is really bad but I eat it because I really am hungry.

I quickly ate my dinner and then went back to my room. I was feeling the overwhelming sadness that I had felt for most of the day. Why did I have to feel so horrible?

Impulsively, an idea to help me feel better came to mind. I reached under my mattress and pulled out the razor I had been using for the last several weeks. I pulled up my sweatshirt sleeve and made several long marks with the razor.

With pain shooting up my arm, I did feel a little better. I wiped up the blood and then crawled into my bed.

 

Chapter 3

 

“So how was school today, Reesa?” my mom asked as I walked through the door.

“Fine,” I lied, even though it had been far from that. Obviously, I didn’t have my homework done but I had given up caring about that. It had just been a rough day because of the overwhelming sadness and the fact that I really didn’t have any friends. I hate depression!

I went up to my room and logged into my blog. I was instantly surprised by the number of comments I had.

 

-“I am glad that you were honest and told us how depression is affecting your life.”

-“You know depression is just made up to legitimatize sin?”

-“Do you have any advice for anyone suffering from depression?”

-“Now I have an idea of what my friend is going through! Thanks!”

-“You can get rid of your depression if you just have a positive attitude.”

 

Some of the comments were a little hurtful but most of them were very encouraging. I couldn’t believe that I had so many comments after one day.

I clicked the tab that allowed me to write a new post and immediately got started.

 

Cutting

 

I am a cutter. Nobody knows about it though. Sure, I really don’t have any friends ever since I ended up depressed but even if I did, I wouldn’t tell them. What would people say if they found out that I was a cutter?

 

I always looked down on cutting. I couldn’t understand why someone would want to voluntarily hurt themselves. What is fun about pain?

 

One day, the idea crossed my mind. The thought terrified me. Why would I want to hurt myself? I didn’t believe in cutting. I looked down on it!

 

I tried to fight the urge but I eventually gave in. I took a razor and made several cuts on my arm.

 

I first cut about six months ago and I am still doing it. I would like to stop but I can’t. It is like cutting is addictive. Plus, cutting makes me feel better. It is a distraction from the painful emotions of depression. It also allows me to express those complicated feelings and emotions and to feel them through the pain I have created.

The thing is, I am ashamed to be engaging in this behavior. This isn’t the proper way to deal with life. My biggest fear is that someone will find out. In the meantime, I will continue to wear sweatshirts and try not to give into the impulse.

 

I published my blog and signed out. I would check for comments later. For now, I needed a nap before dinner.

 

Chapter 4

 

The next day after school, I came home and got out my laptop. I didn’t have anything I wanted to blog about but I wanted to check for comments.

 

-“I think you need to get some serious help.”

-“Thanks for being honest.”

-“Put your trust in God.”

-“Go see a doctor.”

-“Who are you?”

-“I used to be a cutter. It is very addicting and very difficult to stop.”

-“We’re going to feature your blog on the six o’clock world news tonight.”

-“Thanks for-“

 

Wait a minute! My blog was going to be featured on world news? Why? Sure, my blog was certainly popular after only two posts but I didn’t think it was news worthy.

It was almost time for the news to begin so I rushed into the living room and turned on the TV.

“What are you doing?” my mom asked.

“Just feel like watching the news.”

“You have never watched the news.”

“A person can change.”

My mom shut up as the news anchor went on to discuss problems in the Middle East and a hurricane. Finally, at the end, my blog was mentioned.

“Blogging has become a very popular activity,” the anchor said, “but one blog is taking America by storm. It is titled ‘The Thoughts and Feelings of a High School Student” and contains two posts about depression and cutting. People are drawn into it by her honestly talking about her problems. People are giving her advice as well as thanking her for being honest. It is hard to understand why this blog is so popular though.

“Now, the question remains of who is the author of this blog. The biography is very vague and says that they are a high school junior but other than that, we know nothing. The person’s user name is just RR. Experts believe that the writer is a female though.

“If you are interested in reading this blog, you can find a link on our website.”

“I wonder who it is,” my mom said. “It certainly is funny that this person is a high school junior and has the same initials as you.”

“It really is funny,” I said with a nervous laugh. Hopefully my mom wouldn’t start making some connections about my behavior.

I went back to my room and collapsed on my bed. I really needed a nap.

Suddenly, there was a knock on my door and my mom came in with her laptop.

“What are you doing in bed?” she asked.

“I am just a little tired.”

“You really are tired a lot. Anyway, I just wanted to show you that blog they were talking about on the news.”

“One of my friends showed it to me at school today.”

“I feel really sorry for this person. Hopefully, they can get the help they need before it is too late.”

“Hopefully,” I echoed.

“Reesa, please promise me that if you ever start feeling this way, you will let me know. I don’t want you to have to resort to cutting to deal with your life.”

“Sure, Mom,” I lied. It was easy to see how much my mom really knew about me.

“Well, dinner is going to be ready soon. Please wash up and come to the table.”

I sighed as I stood up and left my room. It was sad that my mom wasn’t able to make connections between my behavior and the blog and see that I had problems. I didn’t expect her to figure out that I was the blog author but I thought she would be able to realize I had depression.

 

Chapter 5

 

“Have you read the blog that everyone is talking about?” my English teacher, Mrs. Malloy asked the class the next morning.

Some of us nodded our heads yes and others shook their heads no.

“I want you to go to the website on the board and read the two posts written by this person.”

While everyone else read through my posts, I only pretended that I was reading. I was too nervous that Mrs. Malloy was going to make us do some major project with my blog and then I would be discovered.

“So what do you think?” Mrs. Malloy asked a few minutes later.

“That writer has problems,” Breanna said. “She needs to see a psychiatrist.”

“She could be Reesa Rathburn since her initials are RR,” Liam joked.

“Liam,” Mrs. Malloy said, “while there is the fact that the writer is the same age as Reesa and has the same initials, it is all just a coincidence. The writer is not Reesa.”

A part of me wanted to laugh at her mistake but another part of me was relieved that she had no suspicions.

“Now, since this blog has been capturing so much attention, many news sources are begging the author to come forward. I am sure they are just looking to interview this now famous writer, but like Breanna said, this person probably needs help.

“I want you to write me a short response about whether or not this writer should come forward and tell me why you believe the way you do. Then, I want you to post a comment on the blog, encouraging the author to either come forward or keep their identity hidden.”

I opened a word document on my computer and began writing. I was relieved that the assignment wasn’t going to accidently reveal my identity.

This author should remain anonymous. She shouldn’t come forward because she is using the blog to share her feelings with the world while still staying anonymous. Already, people are making harsh judgments about the girl. Why would she come forward so that people can make those mean comments directly to her face?

Some say that this girl needs help. She already knows she has depression, but yet she chooses to deal with her problems by posting online. If she wanted help, she would have already done that.

 

With my response finished, I emailed it to Mrs. Malloy. Next, I logged into the school account I had created for the blog site and posted a comment on my own blog.

 

-“I appreciate your honesty during this rough time in your life.  Don’t listen to anyone. Just follow your own heart.”

 

“Can I talk to you a minute, Reesa?” Mrs. Malloy asked at the end of class.

I reluctantly went up to Mrs. Malloy’s desk while everyone else left the room.

Mrs. Malloy pulled up my response on her computer. “How do you know the author is a girl?” she asked.

“The news said that the author is probably a girl,” I said quickly. I was feeling nervous again.

“There is just something about your response that bothers me. None of your classmates wrote that she should deal with her problems by continuing to blog and not seeking professional help.”

“I didn’t realize that I was supposed to be of the same opinion as my classmates.”

“I don’t want you to believe the same way as them all the time. But I don’t think you realize that untreated depression can have serious consequences.”

“I don’t think this girl is going to commit suicide.”

“And how would you know? Do you know the writer?”

“No, but-“

“Reesa, I know that you are the author of this blog.”

“No, I’m not!”

“Reesa, I am not going to report you to the press but I do believe you need some help.”

“Promise me that you won’t tell anyone!”

“Promise me that you won’t do anything major and your secret is safe with me.”

“I promise.”

“Please get some help,” Mrs. Malloy begged as I left.

I was feeling worried. I didn’t trust Mrs. Malloy not to say anything. How in the world did she even figure it out?

 

Chapter 6

 

I couldn’t stop thinking about Mrs. Malloy. If she ever told, I would suddenly become famous all because of my problems. As if my depression didn’t complicate things enough!

When I got home that night, I wrote a new blog.

 

Meaning of Life

 

What is the meaning of life? We live about seventy years and for what? Those seventy years, we work hard to survive. We work hard so that we can buy food, shelter, and other necessities as well as other things to make our lives more enjoyable.

 

In the end, we are all going to die. It doesn’t matter whether we ate healthy or were nice to others. It doesn’t matter whether we had nice possessions. We are all going to die and in the end, our life won’t even matter.

What is the meaning of life? We are all going to die. All we do is work to survive. We live to live. Life isn’t even enjoyable.

 

“Did you see the new post from RR?” my mom asked a few minutes later when she came into my room.

“No,” I lied. “Are you stalking her blog?”

“I am just really interested in her life. I am afraid she is going to commit suicide though. She was wondering what the meaning of life is.”

“That doesn’t mean she is contemplating suicide. She has depression. Life is really hard for her right now.”

“But still, that blog kind of frightens me.”

“Why don’t you enlighten me? What is the meaning of life?”

“Well, everyone’s life purpose is different. I hope RR doesn’t give up though. She will discover her life’s meaning someday. I think I am going to write her a comment right now!”

My mom left the room and I got back on the blog.

 

-“Don’t kill yourself, RR!!!!! Life will get getter.”

-“Call the suicide hotline right now! They will help you.”

-“You need to turn to God. Only He knows the plans He has for you.”

-“I will be praying for you, RR.”

-“Think about your family and friends. How would they feel if you died?”

-“Who are you?”

 

I logged off. I didn’t need people telling me what to do. They didn’t understand how hard life was for me. They didn’t see how depression was affecting my life.

Suicide would definitely be the answer to my problems.

 

Chapter 7

 

“This just in,” the news anchor on the world news said that night. “RR, the author of the blog that is capturing America’s attention has just posted about the meaning of life. Experts are worried that RR might be contemplating suicide since she is suffering from depression.

“With nobody knowing who RR is, it is very difficult to help her. RR is encouraged to check into a hospital immediately. If anyone knows RR, they are asked to reach out to her as well as contact the authorities.”

My mind immediately jumped to Mrs. Malloy. Would she say anything; especially since the United States now thinks that I am going to commit suicide?

“I am tired of all this RR business,” my dad said. “If that person is contemplating suicide, then let it happen. It is better than these people who think they need to go out with a bang and kill a whole bunch of people before taking their own life.”

“Suicide is not the answer though,” my mom said. “This person needs to understand that there is help out there. Everything will be all right, in time.”

“I still believe that they are making too much of a fuss about this person,” my dad said.

Would my dad still feel the same way if he knew it was me?

“You are being awfully quiet, Reesa. Don’t you have an opinion about all of this?”

“I think they should just leave the girl alone,” I said. I stood up and headed out of the room.

I knew I didn’t have long. I didn’t know when Mrs. Malloy would contact the authorities.

I ripped out a piece of notebook paper and wrote my note.

 

I just can’t bear to go through life anymore. I am sorry, but I know life won’t get any better. I am just tired of dealing with the pain. It will be better this way.

 

Sincerely,

 

Reesa Rathburn

 

P.S.

I am RR

 

I dug around in a box of my old toys until I found my jump rope. I was in the process of tying it when I could hear sirens close by.

I looked out the window and found emergency vehicles and the press surrounding the house. I knew I was in trouble. Mrs. Malloy had told!

 

Chapter 8

 

I looked around my room dejectedly as I rubbed the bandages on my wrists. I wouldn’t be in the hospital if it hadn’t been for Mrs. Malloy. If she hadn’t told, I probably would have succeeded with my suicide attempt.

I knew what I needed to do. I walked out into the hall towards the phone. I dialed the school’s number and asked to speak to Mrs. Malloy. Since school was over for the day, I knew she would be around.

“Mrs. Malloy speaking,” she said pleasantly.

“How could you?” I yelled.

“I’m sorry; but who is this? And please calm down or I won’t speak to you.”

“This is Reesa. I am calling from the psychiatric hospital. It appears that somehow yesterday the authorities as well as the press ended up at my house. I ended up here because of you.”

“Reesa, I didn’t say anything.”

“Then how do you explain how the press and authorities learned that I was the author of the blog? You were the only one that knew.”

“Reesa, I am telling you the truth. I really didn’t say anything. I didn’t even know about your newest blog until later that night, when the news reported that not only were you discovered as the author of the famous blog, but that you had been taken away.”

I still didn’t believe Mrs. Malloy.

“If you didn’t tell, then how did people find out?”

“I honestly don’t know, Reesa. But if I were you, I would be thinking about why God saved me from the suicide attempt.”

“I didn’t want to survive!” I said angrily.

“Reesa,” a nurse behind me said, “your mom is here. We need you to come verify it is her.”

“I will talk to you about this later,” I told Mrs. Malloy before I hung up and headed to the front desk.

Since I am a famous blog writer now, everyone wants to see me. Lots of fans and press have come to the psychiatric hospital, hoping to talk to me. If I have guests, I am supposed to verify if it is really someone I know. The only person that has come so far is my dad. He gave the hospital a list of people who are allowed to see me.

“That’s my mom,” I told the nurse at the desk.

“You guys can go down the hall to talk,” the nurse said.

“So how are you doing?” my mom asked once we were seated in the sitting room down the hall.

“How do you think I am doing?” I asked sarcastically.

“I know you aren’t very happy right now. You would rather be dead. I am grateful for the blog though. It saved your life.”

“Only because Mrs. Malloy told!”

“Mrs. Malloy didn’t tell, Reesa.”

“Then how was my identity discovered?”

“It turns out the press tracked you down using the internet connection.”

“That should be illegal!”

“It should be but I am thankful that they did it.”

“Yeah, because you didn’t even know your own daughter was depressed.”

“I didn’t at first, Reesa. I admit that I didn’t know a lot about depression. I thought you were acting like a normal teenager. When the news started talking about this popular blog, I found it and discovered there were a lot of similarities between you and the author. I did some research about depression and figured out that you very well could be the author because you probably had depression. I just couldn’t prove it.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I didn’t realize that your depression was so serious until you wrote about the meaning of life. I didn’t think you were capable of suicide but I planned on watching you closely. The press intervened just in time.”

“I am sorry I didn’t come to talk to you like you asked me to right after you discovered my blog.”

“Don’t worry about it. I understand you were scared and thought you were dealing with it through your blog. You are getting help now and that is important. You were saved for a reason and I am very grateful for it.”

“Maybe someday I will feel the same way.”

“They won’t let you out of here until then.”

“I am in no hurry to get out of here now that I am famous.”

My mom smiled and gave me a hug. “The press saved your life,” she reminded me.

 

Chapter 9

 

The fire was burning out of control. I had never felt heat this extreme.

“Stop the fire!” I yelled to a guy dressed like the devil. “We are all going to die!”

The guy laughed an evil laugh. “You aren’t going to die!” he said. “You already died. You are stuck here for eternity!”

No! I thought death was going to be better than life! I had depression, but this was way worse!

“Please stop the fire!” I begged again.

“Reesa!” a loud voice said.

I woke up with a start. I was still in the psychiatric hospital. Carol, my roommate, was standing over me.

“Are you all right?” Carol asked.

“I just had a really bad dream.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Do you know where you are going when you die?” I asked.

“I guess I hadn’t given it much thought. Ma be I have done too many bad things to go to Heaven. I really don’t know.”

“I just had a dream that I was spending eternity with the devil. It was worse than having depression.”

“I thought depression was as bad as it could get,” Carol commented.

“Me too. But what if we are wrong? I don’t want an eternity that is worse than the life I have now.”

“What is going on, girls?” a nurse asked as she came into the room.

“Do you know how to get to Heaven?” I asked her.

“The only way to Heaven is through Jesus. Why are you asking about this now?”

“I just had a horrible dream. I need the answer. I mean, I almost committed suicide. That is why I am here. What if I had died before I knew where I was going? I would be spending eternity very miserable.”

“Why don’t I call my pastor to come talk to you tomorrow morning?” the nurse asked.

“That would be great!”

“But for now, you need to get some sleep.”

The nurse left but I never did manage to fall asleep. I couldn’t forget my awful dream. I also had a ton of questions that needed answered.

The next morning, after waiting for what seemed like forever, the pastor arrived and Carol and I went down the hall to talk.

“So Lisa called me pretty early this morning and asked me to come in,” he said. “She said it was urgent.”

I told the pastor how I ended up in the psychiatric hospital and about my awful dream.

“And now you are having questions about your afterlife?” the pastor asked.

“Do you think I have sinned too much to go to Heaven? I mean, I know suicide is probably frowned upon but in my defense, I am depressed. I also didn’t succeed.”

“Reesa, every person on Earth is a sinner. The only exception is Jesus. God doesn’t care about the size or number of our sins though. All He sees is a sinner. God loves us so much though that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to die for our sins. Whoever believes in Him and accepts this forgiveness, will have eternal life.”

“That sounds too easy,” Carol said.

“It does,” the pastor agreed. “We really don’t deserve His forgiveness.”

“But once I accept this forgiveness, than what happens?” I asked.

“After most people surrender their lives to Christ, they are baptized. Baptism symbolically represents the washing away of all sins. After baptism, a person starts their new life with Christ.”

“And what does that look like?”

“God’s plans are different for everyone. God will reveal those plans to you in His time.”

“What plans would God have for a couple of depressed girls?”

“I imagine He has some pretty big plans for you, Reesa. I imagine because of your fame, you will be able to use your blog for Him.”

This astounded me. Why would God want to use someone that is depressed? I guess God must really are about me. After all, He did stop me from committing suicide. And He gave me fame through my blog. I was ready for my new life with Christ. If God could do amazing things through me when I wasn’t a Christian, imagine what He could do through me as a Christian.

“I am ready to be baptized,” I said, “but just not here.”

“I am ready too!” Carol said.

“We can wait until you get out of here,” the pastor said with a laugh.

“Could you do one thing for me though?” I asked.

“What is that?”

“Would you get on my blog and write that I will be baptized at your church. We can put down a date when we know when I am leaving. I want everyone to witness my decision. I will tell them why I made this decision before I am baptized.”

“That sounds like a great idea,” the pastor agreed. “Shall we pray before I go?”

“Let me,” Carol begged.

“Go ahead.”

“Lord, I thank You for this pastor and for Reesa. Reesa and I are going through a lot right now but You are working all the same. I am sorry that I am a sinner but I thank You for sending Jesus to die for my sins. Lord, help me start my new life by living according to Your plans. Amen.”

“Amen,” the pastor and I repeated.

 

Chapter 10

 

Reesa’s life was turned upside down when her blog became famous. It seemed impossible that anything more could happen to this depressed high school junior. But when Reesa wrote about the meaning of life, all of America started worrying that she was going to take her life. And that’s exactly what Reesa was in the process of doing when the authorities tracked her down.

 

Reesa was sent to the psychiatric hospital. While she was there, she had a dream that she was to spend eternity with Satan. Reesa suddenly started wondering where she would have gone if she had succeeded with her suicide attempt.

 

Reesa learned that everyone is a sinner. God sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to die for all sins. Anyone who believes in Him and accepts this forgiveness will have eternal life in Heaven. Reesa realized that God saved her life and that God now has big plans for her. Reesa is ready for the final step: Baptism. She will have her sins washed away at the Community Christian Church at seven thirty Thursday evening.

 

Written by Pastor Ryan

 

I had gotten home from the hospital late last night (it was late so that there wouldn’t be press or fans watching me). I had spent the day reading through the blog the pastor had written for me and looking at the comments.

 

-“I am glad God saved you. He has great plans for you.”

-“Welcome to the family!”

-“You just made the greatest decision of your life.”

 

“Are you ready?” my mom asked as she came into my room.

“Of course I am ready. I made this decision several days ago.”

“Are you nervous?”

“Not really. Carol is going to be baptized with me.”

“So what is next?”

I shrugged. “I guess that is up to God. I will probably use my blog for Him though.”

“Well, should we go? Pastor Ryan is worried that we will have trouble finding a place to park.”

There isn’t a church service on Thursday nights. But Pastor Ryan had planned a short sermon and a couple songs because he was planning on a lot of people being there.

“I have never seen so many people,” I said to Carol when I arrived at the church.

“Pastor Ryan thinks most of them are here just because you are famous. He is glad because this will be an opportunity to witness to them.”

“Shall we take a seat?” I asked.

“If we can find one,” Carol said with a laugh.

All of the seats in the sanctuary were filled and people were standing in the back. Pastor Ryan had saved a couple seats for us in the front.

At seven thirty, Pastor Ryan welcomed everyone and then a band up front played a couple of songs. The songs were unfamiliar to me but I still really liked them.

After these songs, Pastor Ryan talked about forgiveness and how we didn’t deserve it.

He ended his sermon by saying, “Jesus died for all sins. If you are ready to accept this forgiveness, I invite you to come forward now.”

Pastor Ryan had told Carol and me that this was the time we were to come forward but about fifteen other people came up too.

While everyone sang another song, Pastor Ryan had a quick discussion with these people. Once the song ended, Pastor Ryan addressed everyone.

“Most of you are familiar with Reesa’s story through her blog and how she found Jesus at the psychiatric hospital. Carol was Reesa’s roommate at the hospital. She also surrendered her life to Christ after hearing Reesa’s dream. It appears Reesa’s story has also had an impact on several others who are now ready to start a new life with Christ.

“I have just one question for all of you. Do you accept Jesus as the Lord and Savior of your life?”

“I do,” we said together.

“We are going to sing another song while these people go change.”

Carol and I had brought shorts and t-shirts but the fifteen other people hadn’t realized that they were going to be baptized. Pastor Ryan had thought this would happen though and had some extra clothes with them.

Once the song ended, Pastor Ryan descended a couple stairs into the tub of water up front. I followed next. Pastor Ryan dunked me completely under water. Once I emerged, everyone started applauding.

Carol went next followed by the other fifteen people.

It was the best night of my life. Not only was a now a Christian and going to spend eternity in Heaven with God, but while I am on Earth, God has huge plans for me. I couldn’t wait to get started!

 

 


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