REd Neck Santa and Rudoph

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
This would be the red-neck santa. This is for a contest and dedicated to the real red-neck santa, my dad. He is doing x-mas for us this year at our house. Now mom is gonna love x-mas! Ho ho ho!

Submitted: December 20, 2011

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Submitted: December 20, 2011

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Santa Claus sits on his ole mustang pick-up truck. His hound, Rudoph, lays next to him.

"Rudoph, I'm gonna hook up them jingle bells to the pick-up. We got sum presents to deliver." Santa says, taking a drink of his wiskey-spiked coco.

Rudoph the red furred blood hound looked up and scratched his ear.

"Ho ho ho!" Santa says, holding his belly falling out of his red camo suit. He hooks up the bells and the go off.

"ching ching ching ching." The truck goes. It also goes "Clip clop clip clop"

"Shh! Do you hear Santa?" A little girl says to her brother. They sneak down.

"Rudoph! Help me get up to the darn chimney," Santa says. Rudoph sneezes and Santa climbs to the chimney. He gets in.

"Um, Rudoph. I'm stuck." Santa says. Rudoph sneezes and Santa falls down the chimney and gives the gifts to the sleeping children on the sofa. He leaves.

A few thousand house later

"Well, Rudoph. I'm beat. Till next year. Go get me that wiskey." SAnta says, leaving the pickup and going to his trailer with Rudoph behind him. He scrathes his butt crack, hanging out of his pants. They go in and SAnta falls asleep next to his grand-kids, the Elves.


© Copyright 2017 Kit Wheatly. All rights reserved.

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