The thoughts of a depressed girll

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Hello, this was written for an important purpose. I'm sick of people saying depression and self-harm is just attention"whoring" and what now. We do suffer, this all has gone through my mind, you don't understand how hard it is until you live it. So STOP JUDGING.

Submitted: December 19, 2011

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Submitted: December 19, 2011

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"You are trapped, welcome to your hell! Welcome to the end! Oh wait, you still must live! How does it feel? The depression my dear. How great does it feel to hate yourself? See that blade? That knife? Those scissors, that lighter? Take one, take your pick. Now bring it to your skin, slice, burn, scratch. See the food over there? No longer you will feast upon it. Your one big fatass as is. No one likes a fat ass. You ugly bitch don't even think of walking out that door without make up. Your so ugly. Ugly fat. How does this feel? Do you like it? Enjoy it? Oh I bet! It's nighttime now, now I will have the most control. Let's hurt you. Crimson blood will fall from your arms, your legs, your stomach, your wrists. You are never going to get better.

Oh shit, someone found out. Off to the mental hospital with you.

No, don't push me away, you belong to me now. ME! Why are you pushing me away? I am the only one who cares, no one else cares about you, they all hate yo-."

 

"Oh hi there, look your happy. A smile, how cute! You look great when you smile. Make sure you always stay true to yourself. Like the new meds your on? It helps me to hold you so that nasty depression can't get in!"

 

"I'm still here, I'm pushed away but I'll be back."

 

"Don't listen to her, your happy now, happy! Look how great your doing, and discharge is on Friday! Yay!"

 

"Oh look, I'm back. It's Monday evening and you are finaly home. You came back for me, the meds won't work here, your still the same ugly failure you were before you left. I think you should kill yourself. What an ugly bitch.  Years pass yet I am still right here holding you, killing you. Look at all these people, they hate you, they HATE you. These people online, they hate you, your a whore they say, a slut, a bitch a cunt. It's all true. You are a fucking whore. Yes carve that word into your leg. Whore, Bitch, Ugly, Worthless, Fat, Failure, I hate me. Yes carve them in, now another slice on your arm, more more! Love the blood thirst for it! Yes! I am winning! But oh look you will wake again in the morning. Not too much longer until I kill you off."

 

"I love you! He loves you! Your so nice, pretty everything! What a good da-"

"Fuck no. Get out, she's mine. She isn't happy."

"Bu-"

"No but's get out. Now bring that blade with you, you may need it, you worthless idiot."

 

 

Hello, this was written for an important purpose. I'm sick of people saying depression and self-harm is just attention"whoring" and what now. We do suffer, this all has gone through my mind, you don't understand how hard it is until you live it. So STOP JUDGING.


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