The Love Parody

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
A short parody of a unique love square with characters from Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter that I wrote a few years back.

Submitted: January 15, 2008

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Submitted: January 15, 2008



As Legolas was frolicing through the wilderness, he came upon a field of daisies, which he picked and put in his beautiful, golden hair. Aragorn watched this outrageous behavior and giggled like a school girl, grabbing fists full of daisies and throwing the delicate flowers into the air.

"Stop that this instant!" screamed Samwise as he tried to brush daisies out of Legolas's hair. "Mr. Frodo will see you."

Legolas and Aragorn ignored his warning and giggled louder. Just then, Samwise heard footsteps approaching but much to his surprise, it wasHarry Potter rather than his short-tempered companion. Legolas, now distracted from his flower pickings, greeted Harry with a glowing smile  and loving hug.

"Oh how I've missed you, Harry!" he declared. Harry seemed nervous at this.

"Harry, what is this? I thought what we had was special!" Aragorn tried despartely to hide his womanly tears.

Harry bit his lip. "Um actually I was hoping you would never find out..."

Legolas, now flabberghasted, threw daisy stems in Harry's general direction. "You mean all this time you've been telling me that I'm the onefor you you've been two-timing me with this... this... this cotton-headed ninny muggins?"

Harry gasped. "No Legolas, that isn't it at all! What I meant was, I love you Leggie, I really do, but sometimes I need a strong man to makeme feel safe, you know, with all the Dementors nowadays..." he comforted Legolas with his puny arm on his shoulder.

"That's right, Leggie. It's time to face the facts; you just weren't man enough for Harry." Aragorn flaunted.

"Now Aragorn, you know that isn't true. I love Legolas with all of my heart, I just needed a masculine influence in my life." Harry explained, which seemed to comfort both Legolas and Aragorn. "I'm sorry Leggie. You'll take me back, won't you?"

The guys were too distracted to notice a fourth party approaching until he was nearly on top of them. Draco, one of Harry's schoolmates, joined them grinning, "Come along, Harry. Get away from these pansies!" he chuckled.

"Who do you think you're calling pansies?" Aragorn flashed his sword in Draco's direction, now eager to defend Leggie and Harry.

"I don't know, maybe the two bafoons with daisies in their hair? Let's go, Harry. I know a shortcut to Make-Out Beach." Draco snorted.

Aragorn and Legolas gasped and held each other. "Make-Out Beach? I thought that was our special place?"

Harry sighed impatiently. "I'm sorry Leggie, but you know how I feel about long-distance relationships. I really do love you with all of my heart, but I need someone who can be there for me when you're off with your hobbit friends and that ridiculous ring of yours. I just neededsome stability. Draco means nothing to me. I could never love anyone the way I've loved you." he explained.

Draco grinned and laughed. "That's not what you were saying last night." he raised an eyebrow at Harry.

Aragorn held Legolas as he began to sob. "Honestly, you can't believe him." Harry hugged Legolas and ran his hands through Leggie's long blonde locks.

"Don't listen to him, Leggie. He'll only hurt you like he did before. You can't trust him. He doesn't really love you, he's only using you for your incredible body and your feminine ways. Let's go." Aragorn advised.

Legolas dried his eyes on Aragorn's shoulder and looked at Harry as if he could see through to his heart. "I've wasted my time believing true love really existed and that I'd found it, and I've spent so many things I can never get back, so many laughs, smiles, flowers, kisses, and so much love.You broke my heart, Harry Potter, and I can never love again." He hugged Aragorn, sighed, and left Harry alone with Draco in the field of daisies, and just like that walked away from the love of his life.

© Copyright 2018 kylie pringles. All rights reserved.

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