bits of happiness - by landonslester

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
when you have so little, hold on to what makes you happy

Submitted: September 08, 2012

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Submitted: September 08, 2012

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i watched as she stood there, blankly staring, emotionless. what was she thinking, where was her head. a startled expression came across her face as she finally heard me calling to her. what? she asked. where did you put it i repeated. its under the note pad in the coffee table drawer. as i opened the drawer and lifted the note pad i accidently pricked my finger on the uncapped syringe lying next to the rest of the gear. a deeply blackened spoon  5 or 6 q-tips with most of the cotton removed. torn open balloons and plastic wraps scattered everywhere and then the jar containing the little bits of happiness thats left in either of our lives. as i pulled out a balloon tearing it open and exposing my sweet solice, i turned my attention to her, now sitting on the end of the couch but still distracted. where is the water, what? she replied, the water where is it, in the kitchen ill get it, just hold on a second. she said. as she returned i noticed that my finger had a few droplets of blood escaping from it. i put the tip of my finger in my mouth and cleand it off. now preparing my little shot of jesus, i remove my belt and quickly tie off my arm. pumping my fist trying to expose a vien. i dig in pull back and push off. falling back into my worn spot on the couch. i watch as she rinses out the needle and then fallows my lead. slumping down into her worn spot she turns stretches out and gently lays her head on my lap. i run my fingers through her hair softly caressing her head. she lazily spoke to me mumbling fragmented sentences. what was that, i couldnt understand what you said. i got a call back from the doctors earlier, she replied. they want me to come in to discuss the results of my test. as i struggled to fight the urge to nodd, i said what test? i was screened for hep c and hiv she mumbled. that doesnt sound good i replied. no, not good for either of us, she answered. i could feel her give in and fade out. as i fallowed suit i thought to myself. well, how bad could it be. i put no further thought into it and drifted off. i couldnt let somthing like this ruin the little bit of happiness in my life now could i ?


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