butterflies - by landonslester

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
my love

Submitted: September 04, 2012

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Submitted: September 04, 2012

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do you remember the butterflies, that feeling down inside

you said that you felt them on many a night

where are they now the little things that made you fall for me 

did they rott, wither, and wilt never to be seen 

i thought wed always make it, i hope that we still will 

i can feel the cold, and lonley void that resides in your heart still 

on the last night you stayed with me do you remember how we cried

i felt the death of my lifes purpose when the sun set in your eyes 

the spark, the glow, the burning embers tha ignighted your soul

i watched it fade away in the night leaving me in the dark and cold

i felt the hurt and painfull sting that i put you through

the whole time i only mourned my loss not thinking how it tortured you

im the man you wanted to love and whom you tried to save

im the man that was still a boy and didnt know how to behave

i wasnt shure how to love someone as pure and complete as you do 

and im sorry i dint learn that lesson till after what i put you through

im not begging for forgiveness  i dont ask that you understand 

im doing what i think is right so i can be a better man 

i wanted to be the one that  brings the happiness and joy into your life 

now i hope that peace and comfort is what your able to find 

i wont pretend not to love you, i cant act like i dont care 

i cant block you from my mind and pretend like your not there 

12 hrs of my day are spent trying to be productive 

4 more hrs of that time are spent being self destructive 

trying to recount all the ways that ive hurt you so 

cursing myself for the things ive done that made you let me go 

2 more hrs of the day are set aside to weep

and id spend 4 more doing the same if i didnt have to sleep

the sleep ive come to justify cause i take time out to pray 

that the pain that may reside in you is cast on to me each day 

i rest only out of necessity, cause it hurts when i lay down

 everynight by myself with no one there to put my arm around

dreams ive come to fear most of all, afraid of what ill see 

spectactular visions of me and you and where our lives should be 

these ones haunt me more than any terror in the night 

the more i dream of these scenes the more they fade out of sight 

sometimes i wish i could forget how our life was then 

hoping out of sight, out of mind would be this lonley mans best friend 

but there is no rest for the wicked, no quarter for the cruel

no sanctuary for sinners and no love for the fool 

the fool who could not hold on to what he has won 

the sorry soul that had the world but yearned for the sun 

happy yes, but not content, he needed to have it all 

but her love reached the furthest star and made the universe seem small 

though he couldnt see what he had given up for clouds 

it would take him time to admitt cause this fool was way too proud 

id trade the sun and all its glory to hear you speak my name

out of love without the undertone of my daily shame

ill do thing every day that shame me down inside 

but nothing like what i did to force you from my side

so im sorry now for everyting the gods know its true 

just as they know that my heart bleeds for the pain that ive caused you 

i dont have the words to make the pain subside and go away 

just as i didnt have the words to make you want to stay 

story of my life a day late and a dollar short 

and when it counts most, a sudden loss of words 

but there was no way of talking my way out of it 

you gave in cause i couldnt committ 

now the burden on my shoulders grows heavier with time 

every day that your not with me and i cant call you mine 

7 hrs now ive been awake trying to confess my sins 

and no where in my being is there a sense of healing within 

no, perhaps it wont untill ive made my peace with you 

then it still wont take effect untill i know your words are true

but why would you, how could you, i wouldnt in your place 

to except the sarrows of the one who betrayed and lied to your face 

i dont know if youll ever see or read these words of mine 

just as i dont know if your pain will ease with time 

mine is there and will always be 

as a part of my life that burns within me 

i hope that this is not your fate its not what you deserve 

i wish i could have spared yu the pain of feeling loves sick burn 

there is no one in the entire world that could ever take yur place 

ill never meet another soul thats even worth the chase 

even if i did i have nothing left to give 

cause my heart has already been won and will stay right where it is 

in your hands right where i left it less it get to heavy to yeild 

then place it outside of your front door so i have somthing left to feel 

when i pick it up off the ground and place it back inside 

the painfull beating thats in my chest will remind me im still alive 

till i can bear it no lnger then cut it out 

since ive come to know what love is about 

the joyfull tears and painfull stings

that replaced the blood coursing through my veins 

and as im bleeding out i just hope i live long enough

to live a moment in life without the pain of love 

your butterflies are what i miss the most 

and i hope you can feel them once again 

but everything must die in time only to be reborn again

ive loved and lost ive played the game 

ive lit loves fire and then extinguished its flame 

 

 

 

im sorry

 


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