I always considered myself a better parent than my own till yesterday evening.Maybe because I believed my son treated me as friend or maybe because I never push him for anything .But I never
realised the impact certain of my words and actions had on him till yesterday.
My son is one gem of a kid and I am extremely lucky to be known as his mom.He is a Piscean dreamer and most of the times he would be in a world of his own , making blue print of the stories he would be writing, in that wonderful brain of his.I realize this very well, but certain times it becomes hard to bear his blank looks and I do yell at him and ask him to be a little more responsible, him being the elder brother and all that sort of things.
It was around 10 pm and he was watching TV enjoying a privileged night since today he had no school.My husband had bought groceries and asked my son to arrange them in the cupboard.He piled them in his arms and was carrying them to the cupboard .He finished off in a few trips back and forth and came back to watch his movie.
It was Denny who found something very sticky on his bath towel that smelled and tasted like honey.It didnt take much time to find out what had happened.There was bottle of honey among the items, which broke as he was dumping all of them unceremoniously into the cupboard.It must have been his fear of our yelling or taunting that made him hide the fact.He had desperately tried to mope away the evidence using Denny's bath towel.
There I saw my son, at the door, his whole countenance distorted by fear.It broke my heart.I never thought my son would hide something because he is scared of me and his Papa.I could see myself as a child, telling lie after lie to my Dad unable to bear his yellings .Here there was a difference.My mother was with me then, protecting me, playing along with me .But my son was alone ,both his father and mother taunting him ,scolding him, for making all those tiny mistakes that a 9 year old is wont to make.
I did't scold him ,I just told him " You should have told me then and there .Now I have to spend hours cleaning the entire shelf ." My son just broke down and said " Sorry momma ".I just hugged him.He was unable to control his sobs offering to help me .
Later I discussed this with my husband and we realized where we have been wrong .We were expecting a 9 year old to behave like an adult.
Real happiness came when today my son passed comment on his Papa for raising his voice to switch off the kitchen exhaust.He said ," God , Papa ,you are shouting as if I spilled honey all over the house."
I heaved a sigh of relief...my son has learned to joke about that honey incident.
PS.There is one person I would like to give my thanks to.IT is Mrs Salma Prabhu .Thanks Salma .It was the speech that you gave in my school that helped me rethink about myself as a mother.
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