Inside My Head

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic

My first full collection of poems, about everything you can imagine

Submitted: October 24, 2017

A A A | A A A

Submitted: October 24, 2017



Do not compare me to a summer’s day,

For long nights may follow.

And winters kiss leaves stained pink cheeks

Looking a bit too hollow.

You do not wish for a loving wife

All you want is sex.

You made that clear once or twice,

But, I wonder what comes next.

You try to flirt but we see right through

Those bright and calming eyes.

And, underneath is what we fear

Hidden are all your lies.

I cried and screamed and begged for you

I never had a chance.

But, if I was given another life,

I might have asked for a dance.

I know you’re no good for me,

Still, won’t you hold my hand?

I need the comfort as much as you,

Don’t leave me in this wasteland.

I do not love you, not for a minute,

But I will always need you.

I entered this world to see you in it.

My life no longer continues.








In my blurry mix of feelings

I failed to recite;

The true meaning of love,

Which is not prince or knight.

I wish not for roses nor doves;

I don’t want chocolate hearts.

The only heart I shall receive

Are the ones with no counterparts.

You say you love me, when you know what I hide

Underneath my sleeves.

The scars that do possess me

From all the times you leave.

I do not want to go any further,

In this thing you call a couple.

I don’t know how to say you murdered

The very love I had

But, the little thing I felt inside my heart

Was replaced with another man.

And I have to cast you aside;

Thus a new love has began.


Do you wish I was better?

Easier to take?

As I borrow someone else’s sweater,

Does your heart ache?

I know I’m not ideal

Yet I try to please my date.

I do not know how to feel,

Especially because you hate

Who I really am inside

It’s no use trying to hide

I’m a monster to society;

Can’t you feel my anxiety?

It’s crawling up my arms now

I try to stop it,

But I don’t know how.

And you sit there not knowing why

My eyes well up like I’m about to cry.

I know I’m not the perfect man

But you’re no perfect wife

I try to do the best I can,

But I knew we wouldn’t last twice.

Maybe it’s for the best

That we don’t go out

I see my future, but it’s not with you

That’s what love’s about.


My heart and mind combined

Create shades of black and blue

Like the bruises from my father

And the images of you

Through the screams of hate

And over the screams of agony

You ask me to meet you at hells gate

You look at me absently

I did not know the monster you hid

Under fake smiles and laughs

But he’s eaten your soul, now all’s that left

Is the dark path

You follow the road to nowhere

I tried to make you stop

But my lungs scream in pain

My words give up

My neck is sore

My arms are bruised

From when you held me down

My eyes are closing

Your heart amused

Three seconds till shut down.


Love is a trap

I hear my neck snap

Makes me feel like crap

Try to find my way around

But there ain’t no map

Attached to a chair

With inch thick straps

Starving, searching

for someone else’s table scraps

I wonder what’s beneath that gift wrap

But all I find is the belt

You use to slap

My back.


I feel it all the time

You’re always on my mind

And I really don’t know you

Although I want you to say it too

We are connected for a reason

As we watch for the following season

We must be the same

Tell me it’s not just a game

I can’t risk another heart broken

I take back the words I have spoken

Love is dead to me

Not worth it unless it’s free

I guess I’ll go my own way

And you go yours

Maybe we’ll run into eachother one day

But nothing will happen, we’ve closed that door…







The blood on my wrists

The lies on my lips

Curse the world

And puts it to shame

With long white wings furled

And dress lit up in flames

Try to catch me now

That I am in the sky

I broke the chains to allow

All that’s left to say is goodbye








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