My life within 7-8 years

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I wanted to share bits and pieces of my journal writing to help those in life. More importantly, I want to share that we all come across different people that help us along the way, or we may help them. There is nothing out of the ordinary, or amazing about the people I met, but what truly amazes me is the faithfulness of God. For all of my readers, I want to encourage you to keep a journal of everything you do, because when you look back at it you can see your life as a reflection of what others see around you.

Submitted: December 02, 2006

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Submitted: December 02, 2006



Okay, God is awesome.  When I think about my life within the last 7-8 years I cannot help myself but think of God's faithfulness to me.  Although many times I don't completely understand God's ways, I fully trust in Him.  The Scripture in Isaiah that says, "Your ways our higher than my ways, and your thoughts higher than my thoughts..." constantly comes to my mind.  It is so difficult to trust God whom you cannot see, but through many experiences I've been through I can assure that it is far more better to trust in Him.  God has never giben me reason to not trust Him.

Certain things happen in life that we don't ever understand ~ or people we meet that seem like it's only for awhile, but God has His purposes whether we understand it or not.  For instance, in my personal life, I met one of my ex-girlfriend for a time and we dated for about a year.  I admit that we did have "fun" times in our relationship.  Maybe the relationship we had would of worked out if she gave her entire life to Jesus.  She would constantly assure me that she wanted to draw closer to God and I did everything in my power to help her succeed - but I could only do so much.  I felt in my spirit that she would only "desire" God for my benefit, not hers.  After a year in a half of dating her I saw no fruit in her life.  She was the same and not improving.  I even took a long hard look at my own personal life and saw that my walk with God was being hindered.  She was beginning to influence me, and so I knew that I had to stop this cherade of nonsense.  It was as if I saw a vision of our lives together and we were not growing at all!  I know that I truly loved her and wanted to see her life improve better for God.  I prayed for her and tried giving godly advice.  What more could I have done?  It was as if she was hypocritacal and trying to deceive me.  I have had numerous of conversations with her about all of this, but how long must I wait for improvement?  How long should I hold my trust?  My flexibility, my encouragement, my support and my honesty meant nothing to her.  She was ruining my reputation in life. 

I say all of this because we meet people for all different reasons that not all of us understand.  I believe that I met her to help her, give her guidelines, or a foundation, but now it's up to her to stand on her own two feet.  What will she do with the information I gave her?  Time will tell. 

For my readers, don't be discouraged if you find yourself in similar situations.  Stay true to what you know in God, and be faithful to Him, as He is always faithful to you.  It is far more better to follow what you know God is calling you to do than anything that you desire to possess.  As much as I loved my ex-girlfriend, I had to do something that was hurtful, because in the long run it would help her out as well as myself. 

Sometimes in life, we must do things that we hate doing.  But again I will state, that staying true to God's calling in life is far more better than any dream that you desire to possess. 

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