"Why am I even here?" asks the girl to herself, while she sits in dark. I'm sitting here in the dark thinking about how everything fell apart when I met Eddie. We met outside a library I had saved him from being beaten up. As the days passed we grew very close, became best friends until one night a tapping at my window. Before opening my window I look at him at his chocolate brown eyes filled with the pain of a drunk abusive mother who couldn't blame herself for his father walking out on them. I quickly open my window for him.
"Sapphire, I have something to tell you it's important and I need an answer tonight." He pauses letting his words sink in. I offer him a small smile. "What do you want to know?" He looks at serious. "Do you love me?" Silence for only a short moment. It was something I had thought about over the course of the few weeks we'd been together. "Yes, I do." We kiss the first tim ein so many years I was happy again. That night we lay wrapped in each others arms. Over the next few months we had the best moments together no matter how bad his mother got. Too bad happiness has a way of coming to an end when it's least expected.
Yes, to much happiness only brings a greater pain later on. At the end of the summer eddie was arrested for murders I had hoped he hadn't commited. Only when he confessed to me that it was him did it break my heart making me face the fact that I just couldn't forgive him. He was in prison for life and I made it my duty to visit him everyday even if it meant skipping school. One day, I went in only to have him say things I wasn't sure he meant. In an angry voice he said "Please leave I never want to see again it would have been better had we never met." I remember crying outside in my car.
Now, sitting here in the dark I cry letting the tears I held back for a year go it may be my last night. He had killed himself in that prison tonight's the night the anniversary of that night when I found out. I'm still broken since that's how he left me. I still don't understand why he didn't kill me it would have been far better for the both of us. I only regret having not met him before he became the killer he was.
I can see the moon now I decide to walk over to my favorite bridge. It's a ten minute walk. Once I arrive I sit on the edge looking in the deep blue green waters of the lake before my eyes. I've left the safety of my house to be on the edge of a dangerous world. I close my eyes let myself slip down into the cool water. I was trying to escape my painful past instead I replayed those last few months with Eddie the best time I had with him. I had grown sick of my life and what it was supposed to mean.
On the other side I see a white light then I'm in a field Eddie slowly fading from my memory. "I don't want to forget." I say suddenly I'm placed in front of a large movie screen replaying my life as well as Eddies over and over again. For me it's the only way for me to never forget. It's the only way for me to keep feeling a real emotion even if it's just pain.
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