Let Me Burn

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Literary Fiction  |  House: The Baby Wolf Pack

"Let me burn! Let me burn" were his words before leaving the house. He was looking furious that day. Maybe there was something sinister haunting him so badly that he couldn't even pretend to live a normal life which he has been pretending to live for the most part of his life. Christopher was considered an important member of the society. He had such calmness and patience in his attitude that people used to admire him for such graceful personality. But today all his gracefulness seemed as a veil just to protect something horryfying he had done in the past. Something too sinful to even imagine.

As soon as he left the house, his wife Samantha ran after him. She was intrigued and worried at the same time. She wanted to know the cause of such tormenting pain. What else could she do? He was her husband. It did not matter to her what he had done in the past. She only wanted him to be with her so she can walk again as a symbol of dignity and power in the same society where his husband was pretending to be someone else. Above all she loved him very much. She tried to catch him but Christopher was gone.

Christopher tried to catch his breath on the way. He was sweating and was tired and just wanted to die. He was tired of pretending to be someone else, tired of living a life filled with regret. Infact, he was tired of everything, even his life. A life which nobody knew existed. He stopped for a moment, looked around to see the emptiness of this filthy world where everything was burning infront of him. He gasped a deep breath, thinking of something, he smiled, trying to tell himself that it was the only way to live again. An act of self destruction for reconstruction.

He started running towards the nearby bridge below which a river was flowing with its full wrath. It was a place where monsters like him used to unveil their dark secrets. Some monsters would come back and some wouldn't. It was upto nature to decide. Everyone was treated according to severity of their actions and madness of their past. There was no thing such as "Injustice" in this part of the world. Hearings were heard and actions were taken immediately. In this place there was no mercy for cruelty but only for a mistake, a true mistake. Infact, in this part of world monsters like him used to find life by giving away their lives. Samantha knew where he would go. She came back and started her car and drove to the same place
where she was expecting him to be. He was sitting on the edge of the bridge. She carefully sat down beside him. "Christopher!" she shouted as she rushed towards her husband. "Are you alright?" she asked with care. "You are scaring me. What happened" silence of Christopher was irritating her. She was worried about him but Christopher was not responding to his questions. "Talk to me please, talk to me." she asked him in a calm tone trying to soothe him. 


Christopher with a smile on his face expressing his regret, told her " Samantha you don't know anyhting about me. After what i am about to tell you, you will understand everything and your love for me will be no more." then he took a deep breath as if remembering something"I killed him just because he was my best friend. I was badly involved in drugs those days. He told me many times to stop it but i was not ready for it. I told him to give me sometime and threatened him not to tell my family about this but he kept insisting that it was for my own good, that he wanted to help me and to put me out of this miserable life". Christopher looked at the sky and yelped loudly "But why? I told him not to do this but he did. He thought i was his friend and won't do anything else beside threatening him but what i did was the most terrible thing one can imagine. I went to his house where he was watching T.V and without thinking of consequences i pulled the trigger and few seconds later my best friend was lying on the floor". A moaning sound was heard from Samantha's mouth. She was horrified to hear the story and wanted him to stop. Whereas Christopher's face was flushing with blood. And with cold expression he looked at her and said " As soon as i killed him his seven year old boy came out of his room and watching the blood of his beloved father he ran towards him. Just then i came to my senses and realized what i have done. But it was too late and i was afraid of being caught and this fear made me killed his only son too." Samantha leaned back and got up as if she had seen something terrible. She hoped all of this was a dream and will be over soon.

Christopher without noticing the fear on the face of Samatha continued "Sometimes i wish....i wish i could rewind time like they do in movies.... Why do they give us hope when it is impossible." He took sand in his hands and playing with it slowly, letting it escape from his fingers totally showing he was not in his senses. He knew death was certain today but somewhere in his heart he was not ready for it. Samantha knew what he was trying to tell her by his awkward gestures. He was symbolizing his death, trying to tell her that he was no more her husband and she was free. Samantha's world was shook upside down. She tried to relax him but Christopher burst into tears and started moaning like Samantha had never seen him. "Where are you Richard? Free me from this hell". He was shouting wildly  "Richard i know you are not dead, stop playing games, we are grown ups. Stop it....Please stop it ". He was behaving madly, his body was trembling and just when he was about to fall Samantha held him. "Stop it. Come home with me and we will figure this out." Samantha said in a calm voice taking him by his arm trying to calm him.

Closing his eyes, he said in a resolute tone "There is no way out Samantha. You don't know anything. Taking someone else life is not easy, but for me it was too easy and that is what haunts me" Samntha was looking at the man whom she had loved for his whole life. She was watching him falling apart like an old building decomposing itself. Christopher in weak vioce asked Samatha "Look Samantha, the power of guilt has cursed me. This power will always catch you. It is independant of time. Look at me and see the power of GUILT, how it has ruined me slowly by taking away the peace from my soul."  Christopher looked at the river and stood up. He closed his fists together, "You know what to do now, just push me from this edge. Do this for me, give my soul some peace and free me from this miserable life."

Samantha knew the rules of this WORLD. She also knew what he was asking. But she was not ready for it. Some hope was preventing her from that little push. But just then the whole story began to repeat in her mind. A children was asking her to help him. A voice of Richard echoed in her mind "Do justice, otherwise you will never find peace in your life". Fear of guilt got her that moment and after a long silence, with tear in her eyes, she said "I love you Christopher but what you have done is beyond forgiveness. I hope you find peace. I pray for your forgiveness." her voice was trembling. She was barely able to speak any word. She knew she was going against her will. Her voice was barely audible as she continued "I have known you for very long time and you have been very good to me throughout my life.....(sighs) but then there is justice; eternal and righteous." With these words she looked at him. He was smiling while a stream of tears was flowing down his furrow cheeks. Just when she was about to push him, Christopher stepped forward, raising his hands up for a prayer "God, have mercy on me" and jumped into the river. His body was crushed when it landed on a rock. The impurity of his soul was too much for this pure river. His merciless body was rejected and was thrown away on the bank of the river.

Now the world was calm but she was left upside down. World seemed to be falling apart in front of her. "Christopher! Christopher!"  She started screaming  like she was being ripped or murdered. She bent forward and pressing her palms on the soil looked at her Christopher, who was free from his miserable life but not like Richard wanted. One more monster was lying down there with many others. Her Christopher abondoned her forever. In search of peace he took away the peace of Samantha. Samantha was left alone with the guilt for not helping her husband.

Submitted: May 09, 2016

© Copyright 2021 Lost ones. All rights reserved.

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Oleg Roschin

Dark, passionately written, and emotionally engaging. Perhaps you could break the story into smaller paragraphs for easier reading? Also, speech quotations should have their own double-spaced paragraphs. Good work, keep it up!

Wed, May 25th, 2016 6:00am

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