Santa Claus Rant (Santa is Creepy)

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
A 'rant' about how creepy Santa Claus really is.
[Note: the pick says: He sees you when your sleeping...He knows when your awake...He knows when you've been bad or good...he's really kinda creepy when you think about it]

Submitted: January 15, 2010

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Submitted: January 15, 2010

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Have you ever noticed just how creepy Santa Claus is? He watches you all the time, even when you’re asleep, and he knows where you live. Doesn’t that seem stalker-ish? Then, when he gets to your house, he eats your milk and cookies, like he really needs them. And those poor reindeer have to fly his fat body along with gifts for all the children of the world in one night. Can’t that be considered animal abuse or something? Plus, there are the elves. They work all year round with no pay and no breaks while Santa sits on his fat bum with Mrs. Claus serving him food. And how does he cross the borders anyways? I doubt he has a passport because that would slow him down from breaking into people’s houses.
It’s not like we need Santa; he just fills up the stockings and eats the cookies. Everyone knows it’s the parent’s who buy the gifts; shouldn’t they be the ones getting milk and cookies? But no, Santa gets all the recognition. He needs to retire or something (he is like 500 years old after all).


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