Tell me again?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
A Poem, though it is more like a story, that I came up with in school today, not that good, but anyway....
And LalaHachi, don't worry, IT'S NOT FOR REAl, MY BROTHER AND PARENTS ARE STILL ALIVE AND I HAVE NOT GOT THE WORST OF THESE THOUGHTS, ONLY THE SMALLER ONES!!!
I wanted to do this to show my brother and sister how much they mean to me.
I don't know what I would do without them.

Submitted: November 04, 2009

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Submitted: November 04, 2009

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Tell me again why I'm doing this?

Oh, right because of this:

My life is like a living hell.

Nobody likes me.

Not even my parents,

They just had to go on that stupid plane and get killed.

Not even my brother,

He just had to kill himself.

Not even my cat,

It just had to get run over by a car.

And if I had friends,

I swear,

They would have found a way to die or get lost,

Just to make me feel even more lonely.

I don't even have a home.

I sleep in the park somewhere,

On a bench or even in a tree sometimes.

I eat more food in school than all the others do,

Because I know that it will probably be my only meal for the day.

I have no one to be loved by,

And no one to love back,

I have no where to go,

Because I know,

That if I go to the Police or something,

They will send me somewhere far away,

And I don't want to leave this place.

This is where all memories are,

All happy moments of my life,

And I can't survive without them,

But I can't survive with them either.

Often I make myself faint or something,

Just to come to the World of my Dreams.

That is the only place I can now meet my brother.

You may think that he was only my brother,

But then you are wrong.

He was so much more.

When I was a small baby,

He played with me,

When I started school,

He protected me from children older than himself,

After my parents died,

He was also  like my dad.

He took care of me,

He took care of the house,

He made dinner every day,

He washed my clothes,

He took care of everything.

But then,

About a year ago,

I ran away.

And when I was gone,

He had no reason to live anymore.

He cut himself and wrote a letter with a feather pen and his own blood as ink.

He wrote a long letter to me.

He thought I was dead,

But he could not resist the thought of me still alive,

And if I ever came back,

He wanted me to have an explanation (spelling?) of why he was dead.

I came into his room that day,

And I saw him close a letter.

Then I saw the blood.

Everywhere.

I screamed and he turned around.

He looked shocked at me,

As if I where a ghost.

I ran up to him and asked him what the hell he thought he was doing.

He just smiled sadly at me and said "I'm sorry Sammy, I love you",

Before he fell on the floor and died.

He had left me too,

And that was the point when I started cutting myself.

It felt so good to get away from the pain.

I went to school and did what I was supposed to do.

But no one noticed since they did not care about what I did.

I burned our house down because I hated it.

But no one noticed since it was in the middle of nowhere.

I stole stuff all the time, I even killed someone.

But no one noticed,

Since I was invisible (spelling?) to them.

No one cared,

Since I was a nobody.

So I've decided.

I don't want to stay here.

I miss my parents, my cat but most of all I miss my brother.

So I've decided to join him.

All these things cross my mind in two short seconds while I put the knife against my wrist and take a deep breath.

The last one I will ever take.

"I'm coming Robin..." are my last words before I pull the knife downwards and it cuts into my bloodvein.

While I watch the blood run slowly out over my hand and down on the floor,

I think my very last thoghts.

Tell me again why I'm doing this?

Oh, right, because I'm a girl who doesn't want to live anymore.

Because I'm doing the only thing that feels right.

I'm moving from the place I call My Own Personal Living Hell, or Earth, as you guys call it.

You happy, lucky people who have someone to love.

So don't be jealous,

Appreciate what you have instead,

Because some people do not have anything.

Go pat ypur animals.

Go give your parents a kiss.

Go give your brother and sister a hug.

Tell your friends how much they mean to you.

So just live your life and be thankful for what you have.

And never forget,

That money means nothing if you have no one to share them with.

Someone who loves you.


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