Author's note: Well hey yep I'm writing another "series". Well if you can call it that.... It's not really a series but a collection of short stories(most having a sad
ending) in which all include some sort of guilt. I have already started the second one so it shouldn't be long before that is up :D Any confusion or questions? Just send me an email to the one
specified in my about me(or whatever it is called) xD
I sat back against the tree staring up into the cold, starry sky. As always I was alone and had nowhere to go. No work that night left me just waiting for any chance of warmth.
I was happy that I always wore black because at least that kept some heat in. Of course skinny jeans didn’t really help but it was better than nothing. I was slowly drifting off into sleep when I heard someone call out to me.
“Hey! Wake up! Don’t fall asleep out here, it is winter!” An unfamiliar voice yelled. A blurry face rolled into my sight. At that time all I could see was the fact that his hair was cut in a typical emo style and was black with green streaks in it, that and the fact that he had green eyes.
He lifted me into his arms and held me close to him. It made me feel so much warmer with just that. “Where’s your place I’ll help you get there.” His words echoed, my eyes were closing and I couldn’t comprehend anything.
“Nowhere.” I whispered, barely audible. That’s when I let the fatigue and cold take over my body. That’s when I fell unconscious. That’s when I became vulnerable and led me to the terrible decisions that would follow me within the next twenty four hours.
When I awoke I was laying on a couch staring up at the ceiling. I had a terrible headache and I felt like I was going to be sick. I sat up anyways in order to take in my surroundings. It was an apartment and that I was sure of because it looked quite similar to the apartments in which my last job had taken me to.
My vision still remained quite blurry but I guess that was on account of being out in the cold for so long. Soon after I had woken up the guy came into the room and sat down next to me. He was quiet for a while just watching my movement and then I swear I saw his shoulders relax.
“Since you have nowhere to stay I brought you here. I thought it was the best place for now. You really needed to get out of the cold.” He said with a sigh. I nodded, forgetting my condition and my head fell against his shoulder.
“I guess I’m not totally stable right now. Anyways my name is Chase, what’s your name?” I asked with a short laugh. I went to sit up once more but his hand had wrapped firmly around my shoulder, holding me in place.
“It’s ok; you can rest it here on my shoulder. I really don’t mind.” He whispered into my hair. “Also my name is Alex.” I felt him lean to the side and the room was plunged into darkness. A blanket was brought around me and himself. His other hand rested on top of the one on my shoulder. “Just rest.” He mumbled.
I didn’t know what to say. So I had myself pull myself in to the warmth of the blanket and the guy. It never really occurred to me at the time to get his name but I had more important things to do, I suppose.
I once again woke up, this time without light. The guy still remained where he had been when I had fallen asleep. His chin rested against my head, his breath moving my hair slightly. I hadn’t felt this safe in a long time. But to be honest, I wasn’t safe. He wasn’t what he seemed.
His eyes flashed open and looked at me with his cat like eyes. He was tense for a moment and then relaxed once more. His hands shifted slightly and helped me sit up a little to see his face better.
“If you want we can move to my room, maybe it’ll be a little more comfortable there.” He whispered and again I swear he tensed. His face seemed to redden a little but I ignored it.
“That’s fine. That may be better anyways.” I whispered. He helped me up very carefully. He had me lean against him and we slowly made our way to the bedroom. Now stop for a moment and get the thoughts out of your head which I know you must have. That was not our intention. Or at least it was not mine. I guess it just kind of led to it……
He helped me lay down on the bed, then he laid down next to me. He turned me so that my head rested just underneath his chin. His arms once again surrounded me, making me feel protected.
“I bet you have been wondering why I would take you in. Why I would be so nice and keep you warm, letting you sleep next to me as if you were my girlfriend.” He whispered, chuckling on the last part. “I felt lonely, and you reminded me so much of myself. How I had been living only a handful of months ago.” He said quietly.
There were those thoughts again, the ones which only came to me during work. Why does everyone seem to think I’m lonely? Why do they think I am sad? I had to make it clear, the reason I wasn’t lonely or sad.
“Don’t compare me to you. I hate being compared. Also I’m not lonely, I have a job and I have my co-workers.” I stated trying to pull my head
back, away from him. His arms once again tightened.
“Your workers are prostitutes, and so are you. You’re an escort! You’ve been with men and women and for what, a little money? Why do you do that! Get a better job! I’ve seen you with the men and it really sickens me. How can you let them do what they do?” He asked, waiting for an answer. This was not a question I could evade so I did what I always did to shut people up.
I made a quick motion and my lips connected with his. His eyes widened, his arms loosening for just a moment, allowing myself to move freely. I moved quickly, holding myself just inches above him, not allowing the kiss to end. This kiss could not satisfy the hunger which I should have noticed sooner.
My hands slipped under his shirt and began feeling the warm flesh beneath. I felt him move underneath me and felt a moan grow in his throat. I felt his hard on rub against me and I knew what I needed to do.
Now I bet you know what’s going to happen and I probably shouldn’t even go into this, but then again I probably should. It wasn’t love which fueled this attack, but I guess it really was loneliness. The very thing I had always avoided.
I released him from the kiss for a moment. At this time I slid a hand down his stomach and into his pants. His eyes widened once more and he began to move more now. “No don’t!” He cried, but made no move to stop me.
“It seems you do want me to. Anyways who’s going to take care of this?” I asked as I grabbed hold of him through his jeans, he responded by shuddering. I moved my other hand away to pull my jeans down and then his. This was another reason I hated skinny jeans, so hard to get off.
I got them off after a couple minutes along with his boxers, along with my own, and then I closed my mouth around him. Another moan escaped, this time louder due to the fact that nothing occupied his mouth. He came much too quickly and my hunger hadn’t been satisfied.
I picked him up and crushed my lips to his once more, my hands scanning every part of his body, except for where I would enter him. I pulled away for a moment and looked him over. His body shivered, his cheeks were red, and his face looked so innocent.
I couldn’t hold it in anymore, so I came all over him. This seemed like a cue for Alex. He lifted my shirt up and away. He traveled down my chest and then he bent forward and took my cock in his mouth, something I hadn’t expected. Another thing I hadn’t expected was for him to be any good. But I was sadly mistaken.
He had me there moaning just as I had done to him moments ago. I was used to be taken over by the man, or the rare occasion the woman, I was with that night but Alex didn’t strike me as that type of guy.
“I’m going to cum.” I whimpered. I figured he would pull away but he didn’t. As I came he swallowed it down. I hardened up pretty quickly though. He released me and did another surprising thing. He flipped himself over and lifted his ass up in the air.
“Put it in, please.” He pleaded. I pulled him back towards me and slammed into him. He gasped and then lifted himself up a bit. I grabbed his hips and we began to move as one. Many moans escaped from him as well as I.
He came so many times before I finally did, and when I did we both collapsed. We laid there intertwined for many minutes before we finally moved. Although, we really didn’t move much, I was pulled out of him and he rested his head against my now.
We lay there for what seemed like eternity. Alex fell off into sleep though which provided me with my time to escape. I couldn’t stay here now, not after what I had done. I knew if I stayed I might have never left.
Love is such a strange thing, something that can’t really be explained to those who don’t know it. Love can be something that just happens instantly or something that takes forever and a day. But somebody will never know love unless they try to find it.
I got dressed and I left with those thoughts, leaving nothing behind to be remembered by. I quit my job the next day, trying to avoid Alex as much as possible.
This pleasure which filled me was something that should never have been felt. I hope Alex will never see me again. I just will not be able to deal with the guilt which remains in my mind, destroying any thoughts of love that may have sprouted that night.
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