Death, and what else comes along

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Thrillers  |  House: Booksie Classic
How can you find clarity, when nothing is clear anymore?

Submitted: August 07, 2009

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Submitted: August 07, 2009

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Death, and what else comes along by Maddie Cullen
She was waiting outside his door.
She wished that this would be a movie, and that everything would turn out perfect in the end. She had never wanted for it to happen.  He never told her about it.
But he still gave her butterflies and he still appeared in her dreams. He was still all she thought about. She felt tears, though she thought that she had emptied her body for tears. She had been crying all day. Her eyes were red, but not as red as her cheeks.
The cold November air was silently touching her pale face. Here and there she felt it. Feeling something had become rare to her.
Nothing was important anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. She was never home. She spent most of her time outside his house, or near the ocean. Those were the only places she could think. The only places she could feel. Clarity what was she was seeking. Both in mind and spirit.
It was getting dark. Not only in her empty mind, but the sky was turning grey, and the flowers were dying.
She was tired. She hadn’t slept in 2 days. She couldn’t make herself go to sleep, because every time she did, he came into her dreams. Barging in. Like he wanted to be her everything again. As if he actually could be.
She could by no means forgive him for what he’d done. She had been giving out chances every time, but all he did was let her down. 
She hadn’t been there the day it happened. She had only found him later. When it was too late.
He had been cold. Like ice. He was lying on the bathroom floor.
It was Valentine’s Day, and they had decided, together, to go out, and get something fancy to eat.
She walked in, like she always did, and she had found his almost empty wallet, and his paycheck. Had he already used them all? No way. He would never.
She saw a sharp light coming from the bathroom. It almost drew her to the half-open door. She got a terrible feeling in her stomach. She knew she wasn’t supposed to see this; still she pushed the door open. She stopped breathing. A cold wind blew right through her empty body. She suddenly felt tired but restless. She couldn’t get herself to look at him. She noticed his snow-white face, and her eyes flew down his chest to the left arm. That was when she saw the needle. It was still stuck in his arm. She couldn’t make herself pick up the phone and dial 911. She was paralyzed. Her breathing became forced. Her eyelids were suddenly heavy, and she felt her body trembling. “I’m sorry” she said, while pushing the door open, fleeing.
This was all she could think about. His dead body watching her. Waiting for her to awaken him.
She felt guilty for not feeling guilty. She loved him to bits, but she would never be able to forgive him for what he’d done to her.
The ocean was wild, and she felt idle as she watched the waves break, when they hit the cliffs. For two days it had been like that. It had rained for one and a half week now, and she could not remember how the sun felt on her pale skin. It had been too long. When she closed her eyes, his death started rolling. She never slept.
As the thirteenth wave broke, her mind was clear.


© Copyright 2020 maddiecullen. All rights reserved.

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