death of my sublime spirit

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Horror  |  House: Booksie Classic
dont let the title put you off it gets worse i promise.
from the lost soul of a madeye

Submitted: January 27, 2008

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Submitted: January 27, 2008

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Death it keeps rearing its head around me
It keeps coming trying to surround me
I have seen so much recently I feel it's trying to drown me
Friends and family all seem to be dying
I am suicidal and keep on trying
I don't want to die but I keep getting these feelings
When someone else goes I feel more needless
My life so pointless I know that my worth
Is more than a rope, and a short sharp drop
More than some pills or a blade or a cliff
But I feel so alone so helpless so full of grief
I have loved most that parted and liked all the rest
I love most that still live but fuck all the rest
Some friends I have had killed by aids HIV
Some friends I have had killed by trains and not naturally
Relatives all died from natural causes
If cancer is natural not a disease meant for laboratories
Most of the shit killing people today
Did not exist 100 years ago
We bought it upon ourselves
We batter we kill we maim and we choke
It's a surprise the whole worlds not gone up in smoke.
But me I'm just one person and feeling real down
My smile's upside down a permanent frown
My life ruled by madness and pain and by noise
No longer do I care for laughter and love and small joys
Do I go leave them all join the rest in oblivion
Do I stay soldier on drive my self into a breakdown
Its close I can feel it, it gets closer each day
The madness the weirdness when will it all go away
Every time I feel happy something else brings me down
I go lower than the last time there's not much further to go
God somebody help me please make it alright
I don't know if I've much left I'm losing the fight.
The further and further down that I go
The harder to come back to somewhere I know
I am stopping this writing now because my heads at a pass
If I come back again then my tendencies will have passed.
I think I love you all well most of you anyway maybe on the next plain we can get together for a day.
Maybe in the next life yeah right there's no such fucking place
Human life is the end the finish of the race.
Oh well I may be tighter than a gnats chaff
But that's all I have for now that's enough
Adam


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