The way you broke up with me hurt me more than ANY amoint of words could ever hurt a regular person. I'm not the same as a normal person. Written words hurt me more than anything. And you know this, which is why you did what you did.
You told me that it wouldn't be fair, that you hope it wouldn't hurt me too much. Well, I'm hurt. The hurt is so bad, I cry myself to sleep at night, wondering if the pain you caused will ever end. It's something like...a hand squeezing the life out of me. I can't help but think that it was MY fault that you broke me. But, deep down, I KNOW that it's not MY doing. You did this on your own. I will forget this in a few years...maybe even months.But you will NEVER be forgiven.
I wasn't ready to say good bye to US yet. I wasn't ready to give you up, I never would be either. I just...don't understand why you did this. I don't understand why you hurt me when you said you would protect me from any possible harm.
I'm not ready for goody bye. I never will be. I wanted to keep you by my side for a little while longer. But, I'm smarter than that. I know that if I was to hang onto you any longer, it would have been even harder to let you go. I just hope that you're okay. Because if something were to happen to you, I would blame myself.
You know, I was told not to let you or any of your friends see how hurt I really am. Well, that's not how I like to show my emotions. I either hide myself away from the rest of the world or I just break down, no matter where I am. You hurt me so bad, that the cuts can NOT be healed with out you.
I was honestly hoping that I could confide in you for ANY thing. But you've taken ALL of that away. You made me this depressed, angry, confused person I am now. I blame YOU for all of this now. I don't talk to my family like I used to, I don't write as much, and I don't even like going outside anymore(unless I'm going to the pool, which my family is afraid to let me go because they fear I'll drown myself). This is all YOUR fault, Alan Michael Vanderweele. I blame you, but I still love you and you know this. But you think I;m avoding you. So, you think it, you got it.
Remember this one thing, no matter what we go through, I will FOREVER AND ALWAYS supply you with love that is NEVER ENDING.
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