Poem by: Maij
lust, prostitute, patron
Submitted: April 30, 2011
© Copyright 2016 Maij. All rights reserved.
hmm. i like it. left a lot for a person to guess at. good job.
I'm glad you liked it but I have to ask: When did the guessing begin for you?
it's the last line that i'm not sure of. i'm probably a litte thick is all.
oh, ok. No your not thick, that part is supposed to be up for the readers own interpritation :)
Loved it... ;)
Thank you :) Glad you enjoyed it.
I love this. Very descriptive, I can picture what's going on. I wonder what brought them together...? This definitely leaves a lot up for interpretation. I could almost see her being a prostitute.
Very good writing, no matter the interpretation.
Thank you so much. Your the second person to say that the conent can be interpreted in many ways when I intended for this piece to be very blunt and straight forward. If you have time I'd like to know how you see this scene taking place.
Well, at first I thought from your poem description that this was an affair between someone high up in society and someone lower. But then I read it, and I guessed at the prostitute because the man in the piece seems to have no care for her really. He's just there for the pleasure. Then I glanced at your tags and saw I was right.
I feel perhaps she wants to impress him on an emotional level? Even though all he wants is the sex, it seems that she wants something more.
The last line still confuses me a tad... I'm not sure what you meant by her 'previous assumption'.
Wow you hit it on the head! I was making a reference to social classes and in addition to that I wanted the encounter to seem detached and routine but different for the female character. Since she's a prostitute sex is nothing more than a job and she wasn't expecting to "feel" anything. The reference to a 'previous assumption' is in regard to lines 10 & 11 where she makes a sarcastic assumption that he will succeed in pleasuring her with his fingers. It's kind of a stab at the ego of her customers who assume that they can please her. At the end of the night he surprises her by proving that he does posses some skill when it comes to sex. Hope that makes sense
A sticky sweet delight of sexual fanatsy which had me drooling for more.This seduction between these two is undenaiable yet i can't help but feel that there is also a chemistry between them.Surely sex is devoid of chemistry it's just for the pleasure.I loved the fruity comment like she was there for the picking,well i'm sure he enjoyed her cherry.
Thank you very much for your clever and witty insights(not to mention racy but look who's talking, right?) I'm happy you liked it and even happier that you appreciated my play on words :)
My fruit is ripe! - I see some dirty thing in there? haha jk...
I didn't read the summary. I read the poem fully and I thought that this was a love scene - a true love. The percentage I'm allowed to keep - though it confused me, I thought maybe it was the pocket money her parents would give.
After seeing the summary and the tags, I somehow understood it. wow... My fav is 'my fruit is ripe.'
Take care :)
Thanks for reading and commenting. The 'ripe fruit' comment is indeed a sexual allusion. This woman is a prostitute so the percentage she is allowed to keep comment is in regards to the money she makes and what her boss allows her to keep.. So I highly doubt that her parents gave her the money haha :) Thanks again for your comments Arun. I appreciate you taking the time to read and extend your thoughts??
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