Maybe it would have been easier had the ending not been the best part.
It started innocently enough.
It was one of those things where you never saw it coming. You met two guys who were best friends, started dating one, and then dumped him cause you fell in love with his best friend. Just your typical high school romance right?
Okay maybe not.
Looking back now at all the pain it had caused you, and the emotional damage, you regretted breaking up with your boyfriend for his best friend. Your boyfriend was a total sweetheart and a great guy. He was smart, good looking, and emotionally stable. Usually you only get to pick two out of those three. He was the definition of a keeper.
Except for one thing: every time he held you, you were thinking of his best friend.
But you could get past that, right?
As time went on, it got worse. He probably should have dumped you for being all over his best friend, blatantly right in front of him too. But he didn't. And it got to the point where you didn't know why you were dating him anymore. So you pulled the trigger.
"I think we're better off as friends," you tell him. Leaving out the part about being in love with his best friend.
He responds with a simple "okay."
And that was that.
But of course it's not that easy.
Nothing's ever that easy.
You were head over heels for his best friend, and his best friend was head over heels for you too. But he could never date the girl who just dumped his best friend with the most cliche breakup line known to mankind. Never.
So what now?
Act like boyfriend and girlfriend with out the title?
Sounds easy enough.
Except, when the time comes, (and it always does) how do you break up with someone who you aren't dating?
Ah, theres the problem.
Apparently you can't.
So one day when everything changes, and you have no idea what happened, remember what you got yourself into.
But what happened?
Who knows. You'll never know.
One day he went from hugging you, and smiling at you, and holding your hand, like you're the only person in the world, all in public at a football game, to ignoring you.
So what now?
Endless nights wondering why?
Feeling you heart break a little more every time you run into him?
Being emotionally scarred for years to come?
Check, check, and check.
But hey, all good (and bad too, luckily) things must come to an end.
You go away to college and realize theres plenty of other fish in the sea.
You remember all the things you loved about him. His curly hair, and the way his eyes crinkled up and got all squinty when he smiled.
But then you're home on break and run into him. He's not as cute as you remembered.
It gets you questioning.
Why did I care so much?
Maybe he's changed, or maybe you've changed.
You can look directly into his chocolate brown eyes without cringing.
You don't feel like you know the person behind those eyes anymore.
And that's okay.
That's more than okay.
Maybe you've finally done it.
Maybe you've finally healed.
"Why was that so hard?" you ask yourself.
Probably because you had to face him in school every single day, never knowing what went wrong.
Probably because every time you made eye contact, you could practically see the memories flowing between you.
Probably because the ending was the best part.
Right before it all went bad, it was really really good.
The best it had ever been.
And then it was gone.
The newest memories were the best ones.
When you looked back to your relationship, the best ones had been the most recent.
Of course thats hard.
And those memories were great.
But now you know there's so much more than this guy you used to spend time with.
You realize he's a part of you past, and he'll always be a part of you, but he doesn't need to be a part of your future.
He helped shape who you are.
But only one part of it.
He was a chapter in your life.
You're a book with many chapters.
He's just one.
He makes up a part of your story.
But one chapter doesn't define a book.
And one experience, doesn't define you.
The only thing better than a great ending?
An exciting new beginning.
© Copyright 2017 Maria Fox . All rights reserved.
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