Ragtag

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is just a preview of my story, Ragtag, that's about a girl who's one of the boys. I'm trying to make it less cliché, so help me if you can. :)

Submitted: October 06, 2009

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Submitted: October 06, 2009

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“The First Cut Is the Deepest”[MJY1]

We were lying under my truck, and he was elaborating on different things that could go wrong with my truck.I wasn’t paying attention.I was hoping that he would suddenly say, “Forget the truck, and make love to me, Shiloh.” And we would.The rest of the garage would leave, and we would, under my truck. I noticed a funny thing about my Zachariah fantasies: he never called me Fox in them.Now that I thought about it, the same could be said for my Matthew Fox and my (secret) Zac Efron fantasies. I wonder if, in Zachariah’s fantasies, if his lovers said “Zach.”Maybe it was reverse for him because everyone called him Zachariah.Did everyone in Ed Belcher’s call him Edward? Because saying, “Make love to me, Ed Belcher,” sounds awkward and would turn me off if I was Ed.
Zachariah must have realized that I wasn’t paying attention, because I think he shut up.Maybe he didn’t, because I was thinking quite hard about celebrities who had had their names changed.What did their fantasy lovers call them? I think my thoughts had drowned out his talking.
I looked over, to find that he had, indubitably, fallen silent, and was staring at the under workings of my truck. He slid out from beneath my truck.I prayed that this wasn’t like the time my teacher had gotten angry because I’d let my thoughts about soup get carried away and hadn’t answered his question, which he’d asked seven times. You’d think that after the third time, he’d get tired.Especially after having chicken noodle soup spilled on him.It was a big, yellow glob on the front of his pristine white shirt.There was a piece of chicken where his nipple would be. I say “would” as if he didn’t have them, but I’m pretty sure he did, because every day when we got into class, they would poke out like headlights, and I would try my best not to laugh out of courtesy.But that day was bad, because it was like a wet T-shirt contest, only with soup and not water.
Back to Zachariah, though.
I slipped out from beneath the truck, and stood up. Zachariah was standing there, arms crossed, and looking brooding like always. I found myself drawing back a little.“Fox, don’t get me wrong.You’re really cool and all… it’s just that…”
I thought of the book Diane had gotten me two Christmases ago, and realized what was going on. “You’re just not that into me.” What a crappy Christmas present! Though I suppose it would come in handy later in life, when I was actually a member of the dating world.
He stared at me incredulously. “That was a lot easier than I thought it would be.I’m sorry. I’m just into someone else, that’s all.”
You could have hit me with a freight train at that moment, and it wouldn’t have had an effect on the fact I realized just then.“It’s Harley!” I said, and his brow furrowed. “Am I right?”
He paused, and the crease between his eyebrows diminished, and he said, “You are, actually.I can’t believe that I didn’t realize it earlier.” Suddenly, his face relaxed. “You aren’t… bitter or anything, are you?”
To my own surprise, I realized that no, I was not. I smiled at him, and said, “No. I kind of knew all along.”
But I realized I was, but only a little. I got home and ate a whole tub of ice cream and cursed about the stupid groundhog seeing his shadow. Puxatawney Phil could stay in his hole for the rest of his life for all I cared. Why was it a holiday? Groundhogs probably pop out of their holes and see their shadows all the time. Then every day would be a holiday. Which I wouldn’t mind, but Groundhog Day was just stupid.
I mean, I wasn’t going to declare a holiday of Gertie finally finding her favorite toy in all her fat that day. She was just lolling around on her back, when she jerked forward (a stealthy ninja-like move I’d never seen Gertie be able to do unless she’s angry) and batted at her belly fat. She then growled at the pain she’d caused herself (I assume), but batted again. Then her toy flew out from her fur and landed a few feet away. Gertie fell onto her back again and made a few unsuccessful attempts to pull herself right side up. Then, she sprang to her feet, batted at her toy, and slinked off creepily.
That was the best thing that happened all day.

[MJY1]Groundhog Day


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